I have arrived in the city of Stormwind, where I’ve learned that Paladins make for unpleasant companions. Their purported abstinence from ale, revelry, and flesh seems to lead to an unpleasant disposition, which is then followed by a vigorous lack of abstinence in all three. This, mixed with their affinity for smiting things, makes them incredibly dull and at the same time very dangerous company.
Along the road I met a fascinating woman versed in many types of magic, known as a “mage” in these lands. Her magics were potent and spectacular, although after each demonstration she would sit down and begin drinking water furiously. Our interview was interrupted many times as she excused herself to answer the unsurprisingly frequent call of nature.
I admit it was a delight to meet someone else with scholarly interests, although our interview was brought to an abrupt end when she inadvertently angered a very small animal, and was subsequently torn to pieces.
While seeking shelter from a storm in a nearby basement, I encountered a diminutive fellow who claimed to be a “rogue.” Based on the amount of blood on his clothing and the daggers he brandished I at first mistook him for an unusually surly butcher or perhaps a morose chef. His black garb was ideal for concealing the unsightly bloodstains, although it was more than a little unsettling.
I asked him several times about his line of work, but unlike the other people I’ve met thus far he was not eager at all to talk about himself. Instead, he was inexplicably keen on persuading me to turn around. He assured me, repeatedly, that he had no intention of stabbing me in my back. This made it all the more shocking when, the instant I turned away, he did precisely that.
I never did learn his name or anything about his line of work. When I recovered from his treacherous blow, I found he’d gone missing. Along with my pack.
Despite this, I still preferred his company over the Paladin.
Shamus Young is a programmer and writer by trade, videogame nitpicker by inclination. If you have the patience for more of his ramblings, they can be found at ShamusYoung.com.