The scenery in the new Prince of Persia is less “Arabian Nights” and more “Dr. Seuss” in style. In that spirit, I offer the following:

“This place makes no sense!”, I cried with a wince,
as I ran through the world of the young Persian Prince.

With so little support, the place always tilts,
’cause they made it from stone. And they put it on stilts!

You have to climb things ’cause the steps are all gone.
…along with the bridges, the roof, and the lawn.

The doors seem to suffer from many perversions,
like Tim Burton made them instead of the Persians.

The place looks absurd, the towers seem fake.
And who built the castle in the shape of a cake?

Who built all this stuff, and what keeps it aloft?
“That”, my wife said, “Would be Ubisoft.”

Shamus Young is a programmer and writer by trade, videogame nitpicker by inclination. If you have the patience for more of his ramblings, they can be found at

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