In previous writeups, I may have subtly insinuated – or, rather, explicitly stated – that my adventures in the Wrath of the Lich King Closed Beta won’t be solo this time around. As luck or coincidence might have it, I happened to have one or two “associates” who not only played on the same server as I did, but also worked in the same office.
While these intrepid souls may or may not be involved in certain special ideas I may or may not be planning, they’ll be a part of my adventures – and have adventures of their own as well. Maybe they’ll be able to answer some of your questions on how the classes they (and you … but not me) play fare in Northrend.
So, without further ado, here’s your chance to meet the Awesome Brigade (…yeah, the name’s a work in progress. I kind of like it.):
Name: Jayne(z)
Class/Spec: Mage/Fire(?)
Professions: Tailoring / Enchanting
Alias(es): CantFaketheFunk, Waterboy
Arch-Nemesis: Dell Laptops
Favorite Ninja Turtle: Donatello
Favorite Drink: Sam Adams’ Boston Lager
Favorite Team Fortress 2 Class: Pyro – okay … actually it’s the Heavy
Your not-really-all-that-humble narrator, The Mage They Call Jayne(z). Fond of setting things on fire, though with an expansion closed beta come 1-copper respect costs and a pressing need to try out everything he possibly can. Primary duties include: providing refreshments, turning monsters into sheep, and making awful puns.
***
Name: Meditation
Class/Spec: Priest/Holy
Professions: Tailoring / Engineering
Alias(es): Mr. Uncreative, Pretty-In-Pink
Arch-Nemesis: Shadow Word: Death
Favorite Music: Hard rock or Sinatra, depending on how bad the tank is
Favorite Drink: Jack Daniels or Jack Daniels, amount depending on how bad the tank is
Favorite Game: WoW or Anything-but-WoW-because-that-stupid-tank-doesn’t-know-what-Taunt-is-for, depending on my patience level
Though Meditation is well-versed in the ways of face-melting (and his Armory reflects that), for the purpose of our adventures he has deigned to throw on his Devout set and keep us all from dying. Or, rather, he’ll try. Primary duties include: casting Power Word: Shield, casting Power Word: Fortitude, and seeing exactly how low he can let the tank’s health drop before the heal lands.
***
Name: Slycne
Class/Spec: Rogue/Combat
Professions: Flower-Picking / Leatherworking
Alias(es): Slick Knee, Mr. DPS
Arch-Nemesis: Aggro
Currently Reading: The Book of Jhereg by Steven Brust
Favorite Drink: Guinness
Favorite Battletech Mech: Vulture/Mad Dog
As a Rogue, Slycne’s chief weapon is surprise. Surprise and fear. That is, his two weapons are surprise and fear and … I’ll end that joke now and just admit that as a Rogue his two weapons are whatever he uses to make things dead before they make us dead. Primary duties include: killing things, sapping things, and going AFK while stealthed.
***
Name: Scones
Class/Spec: Warrior/Protection
Professions: Mining / Blacksmithing
Alias(es): Omelette, Croissant
Arch-Nemesis: Durn the Hungerer
Favorite Music: Piedmont Blues
Favorite Drink: Bourbon (when accompanied by Blues), else Scotch
Chances of Being Intoxicated While Tanking: 70%
Chances of Causing a Wipe due to the Above: 85%
Chances of Blaming the Healer: 100%
I think there’s a joke here about scones and beef, but I’m not sure exactly what it is. Regardless, Scones is our group’s tank, meaning that he’s willing to get punched in the face over and over again – so that we don’t have to. Primary duties include: marking pulls, making pulls, and trying to keep Slycne from pulling aggro just from breathing on the target.
***
Since there are only four of us, a fifth is always welcome – so if you’re lucky enough to get in the beta, feel free to hit us up on Northrend (PvE)! The more the merrier!
Rumor also has it that there is a fifth member of our intrepid team, but one who lacks a level 70 Horde character and so will be primarily covering everyone’s favorite brand-new Hero class. But there’s no way to really know for sure, now is there?
We’ll get some actual content going up soon, so stay tuned and stay cool.
See you next time!
-TMTCJ(z)
