The Thread of Love

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Laugh your ass of when people suddenly yowl in pain while trying to eat solid foods with a bad mouth ulcer.

McDonald's.

It tastes nice.

The Burger King

The things you did to me as a child have made me stronger.

Shampoo in your eyes.

Oh the pain! It hurts so good.

Dr.Who has been cancelled. (Not really though)

Noooo, that show is the tits!

Extremely hot and humid weather.

I can lose weight.

Cancer.

Its a neat star sign!

Cancelled game.

I can finish my backlog now.

Dick moves by unhappy corporations.

At least... at least... at.. least... at least we have something to complain about.

Rabies.

The Doctor gives you a lollipop after he gives you the shot.

Pets shitting on the floor.

At least I know my pets are having the correct bowel movements! No constipation, they could die from that.

Erectile dysfunction.

Now I have an excuse to NOT get laid!

Cockroach stuck in your ear.

Gives you an excuse to stay away from people.

Rotten apples.

damn fine fertilizer

appendicitis

Get rid of unwanted appendixes.
Those who hate kittens

Often like puppies.

Flashing gifs.

They're more intense than regular gifs.

Mispronunciations.

They allow for funny posts on the internet.

The Spice Girls.

They don't burn the roof of your mouth.

Human nature.

We do have some possitive qualities.

Meaninglessness.

Means that your failures don't matter either.

Corpses.

Probably the least harmful thing to "rape". I don't condone it, however.

Taking things too seriously.

Can lead to things getting done.

Dull blades.

Still good for poking things.

A punch to the face.

A great song by Frezal Rhomb.

Curb stomping.

Something to do when bored.

Head wounds.

Might leave some badass scars when they heal.

Losing an eye.

Now I have a cool eye-patch!

Giving love a bad name.

Can teach caution and critical thinking.

Narcissism.

Who needs the company of others when you are the best company you could have?

Inferiority complex.

People will keep praising you.

Superiority complex.

Well it's just what people say I have when they are jealous of the simple fact that I'm infinitely better than they are, so really I should just take it as a compliment, though it's not like I'm not reminded of that ever single second that I exist.

Being a flamboyant supervillain who will innevitably ge his ass kicked by that stupid noble hero.

At least you'll end up being the fan favourite.

Lobster hands.

Good for supervillainy.

Broken leg.

I bet some fine-looking girl is going to feel bad for me... and bend over... and ask me how it feels...

Vegetarians telling you not to be what you are not.

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