In a dramatic shift from current trends, Nintendo’s new console appears to be generating violent, irrational behavior after it’s launch, rather than before and/or during, as has been the case with Microsoft’s and Sony’s new consoles.
Instead of muggings in the line at Best Buy, we’re seeing domestic abuse masquerading as “Wii injuries.” Instead of car windows being broken, it’s TV screens. And instead of paranoia over what playing the games will do to minds our children, we’ve got paranoia over what playing the Wii will do to the faces of our children.
This is a glorious time to be alive, and thankfully our inveterate bloggers are on the case, crying shenanigans over obviously photoshopped cries for attention and trying valiantly to stay on top of the ever-increasing list of household objects destroyed by flying Wiimotes.
Yet all of this attention on the FUD flying around over the possibility of a loose Wii in your house (Is your HDTV safe from the Wii? Find out after the jump!) is ignoring the most painfully unique aspect of the Wii: it’s encouraging people to get up off the couch and move.
Sure, a busted TV, finger or baby is a bit of a drag, but people who go outside and do things are constantly facing trauma, tragedy or death. It’s called living, people. Carpe diem! Let no bonds of nerdic prudence keep us tethered to our sedentary pursuits! Let us go forth and actively vegetate! A vote for Wii is a vote for progress!
Besides, they’re making better straps now, so that damage thing should be under control. One hopes.
For completely missing the point and reinforcing outdated stereotypes, I’m giving everyone involved a score of ii. And Nintendo? You get a score of 249, payable in US dollars.