Afraid of Skyrim’s spiders? Trust me, it could be a whole lot worse.
Ever since the debut of The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim arachnophobic modders have been altering the game to remove the horrifying presence of its eight-legged denizens. Some mods replace the creatures with less aesthetically-menacing ursine foes, while others, like the mod seen in this clip hope to give the creatures a more family-friendly, Disney-owned image.
It’s a noble idea; “Replace spiders with Spider-Man.” In theory that should work, but in practice the results are straight out of a Hieronymus Bosch depiction of that one ring of hell Alighieri cut from his book for “being way too icky.”
Don’t get me wrong, the mod is successful. The spiders have been replaced by Peter Parker’s alter ego. However, the modder didn’t do anything to alter the animation routines of the creature, resulting in a Marvel Comics superhero eternally doomed to crabwalk across the surface of Tamriel, feeling out possible victims with his pedipalpian hands.
Then, to ratchet up the horror, the modder decided to demonstrate his creation by dumping dozens of the abominations into the middle of Whiterun’s town square. They twitch, they scurry, and I’m almost entirely convinced that if they were capable, each of these mockeries of nature would scream in agony and beg for the sweet release of death.
Source: Kotaku
Published: Dec 22, 2011 08:33 pm