Image Credit: Bethesda
Forgot password
Enter the email address you used when you joined and we'll send you instructions to reset your password.
If you used Apple or Google to create your account, this process will create a password for your existing account.
This site is protected by reCAPTCHA and the Google Privacy Policy and Terms of Service apply.
Reset password instructions sent. If you have an account with us, you will receive an email within a few minutes.
Something went wrong. Try again or contact support if the problem persists.
You Suck at Parking Review in 3 Minutes Happy Volcano

You Suck at Parking Review in 3 Minutes – Top-Down Parking Chaos

Recommended Videos

You Suck at Parking is a top-down racing game by Happy Volcano in which your goal is to race through obstacle-laden courses and park your car.

Each level, you drive your car using WASD keyboard controls or a control stick and R2 until you get to a parking spot, and then you brake. The challenge is sometimes in parking precisely, but more often itā€™s in getting to the parking spot in one piece and not getting knocked out of it after you park. Each level features a time limit and a fuel meter that prevents you from going too slowly on an individual park, which keeps the game frantic.

The controls are consistent but weighty, and youā€™ll find yourself careening around corners while avoiding or using the gameā€™s many physics-based obstacles. Things like jump pads, ramps, electrified walls, and magnets keep the game interesting and challenging throughout its runtime, and many of the levels combine them in clever ways.

You Suck at Parking is structured similarly to a puzzle game. Thereā€™s a hub world within which you find a series of themed levels. Once you begin a level, there are two-to-five parking spots you aim to park in. Once you park, youā€™re given a new car at the start of the level, and you aim for another parking spot. Once you fill all spots or run out of time, you get credit for your parking and the level ends. New hub areas are unlocked by completing more parking spots, so youā€™re encouraged to do your best, and there are even Mastery challenges unlocked by completing a level in the minimum amount of cars possible.

Thereā€™s the requisite leaderboard to compare skills with your friends, and although I donā€™t care for leaderboards, I still found satisfaction in completing each level well. The game is pretty hard and can be frustrating, but thatā€™s the fun of it. You die a bunch trying to figure out the best path through the level, then complete it and feel cool.

You Suck at Parking currently only takes a few hours to run through the levels, with the devs promising more content as part of the live-service gameā€™s future. Thereā€™s currently a season pass with a free and paid track, with more seasons to come, as well as paid cosmetics in the store. I didnā€™t get to try the multiplayer mode where you race your friends, and I also didnā€™t attempt to max out the battle pass, so I canā€™t comment on how long it takes.

Itā€™s possible the gameā€™s $20 price and the further $12 for the season pass will help the devs fund future content for the game, as promised on the roadmap. But thereā€™s never any guarantee, and thereā€™s just as much chance the devs go bankrupt or something. As it stands, the base game is a little content-light for its price point, which makes paying even more for the season pass feel questionable.

Right now, You Suck at Parking is a cute little racer that reminds me of playing Flash games back in the day ā€” only a lot more polished, with cool music and some clever levels. I genuinely had fun with it, and it does what it wants to do well. If you like improving your times and trying all the hard levels, youā€™re going to have a blast, and the game and season pass may be worth it for you. But if youā€™re just looking for some casual top-down racing, Iā€™d say wait and see how many levels get added, or play it on Game Pass.

You Suck at Parking releases on September 14 for $19.99 on PC, Xbox, and Xbox Game Pass and will come to Nintendo Switch and PlayStation in 2023.

Watch the Review in 3 Minutes for You Suck at Parking.


The Escapist is supported by our audience. When you purchase through links on our site, we may earn a small affiliate commission.Ā Learn more about our Affiliate Policy
Author
Image of Elise Avery
Elise Avery
Elise Avery is a freelance video editor and writer who has written for The Escapist for the last year and a half. She has written for PCGamesN and regularly reviews games for The Escapist's YouTube channel. Her writing focuses on indie games and game design, as well as coverage of Nintendo titles.