MetroidNutQuest 2012

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>MN: Hurl your MEATY FIST at the conveniently window-shaped target in front of you.

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You throw your SHITTY AIRSOFT REVOLVER, which you have nicknamed THE MEATY FIST, out the window. Huh. Looks like it was open.

>MN: JUMP out the conveniently window-shaped target in front of you after your SHITTY AIRSOFT REVOLVER nicknamed THE MEATY FIST loaded with 1 AIRSOFT BB. Lose the PANTS along the way.

>MN: Do the hope thing.

>MN: Give that Strider douche his sunglasses back

>MN:Throw hat trough the window

>MN: Give that Strider douche his sunglasses back

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That's absurd! Strider is a fictional character, unlike you! You can hardly give him his sunglasses - oh. You were being sarcastic, weren't you? Alright. That's fine.

You hear an ominous "click" as your door locks itself.

Smartass.

>MN: Wedge chair under the door knob to prevent intruders from entering

>MN: Smoothly put on glasses like Horatio Caine of CSI: Miami, say witty one liner, and then flash to intro while Roger Daltry yells "YEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!"

>MN: Put on PRESCRIPTION AVIATOR SUNGLASSES.

>MN: Smoothly put on glasses like Horatio Caine of CSI: Miami, say witty one liner, and then flash to intro while Roger Daltry yells "YEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!"

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Your revolver is loaded, and your door...is locked.

http://mirrors.rit.edu/instantCSI/

>MN: JUMP out the conveniently window-shaped target in front of you after your SHITTY AIRSOFT REVOLVER nicknamed THE MEATY FIST loaded with 1 AIRSOFT BB because you think you are "the man". DO NOT Lose the PANTS along the way.

>MN: Marvel at the miraculous technological advancement that is your self-locking door.

>MN: JUMP out the conveniently window-shaped target in front of you after your SHITTY AIRSOFT REVOLVER nicknamed THE MEATY FIST loaded with 1 AIRSOFT BB because you think you are "the man". DO NOT Lose the PANTS along the way.

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You succeed at one of these things.

>Roll down the street, leaving your house and pants behind FOREVER.

>Roll down the street, leaving your house and pants behind FOREVER.

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As you attempt to roll down the street, you hear a terrifying sound - that of your LUCKY FEDORA being wrinkled. Looks like you can't roll without damaging it! You think you'll lie on the ground a while, instead.

>MN: Do the smart thing, and stand back up. Immediately put pants in PANT POCKET for safekeeping.

>Crawl across the street like a worm

>MN: Have an epiphany*

Epiphany: Realisation of Great Truth, as defined by a West-Indian Man to Homer Simpson in "The Simpsons Movie"

>MN: The components are in place. Begin the ritual.

>MN: Do the smart thing, and stand back up. Immediately put pants in PANT POCKET for safekeeping.

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That would create a tear in the fabric of space and time!

>MN: The components are in place. Begin the ritual.

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You cannot begin the ritual without your SHITTY AIRSOFT REVOLVER and a DOG!

Find DOG in your pants. Name him Weiner, as he is a SAUSAGE DOG (aka a Daschund)

>MN: Summon your faithful steed using your MEATY FIST as a STEED-WHISTLE. Guns can be used like that, right?

>MN: Cry.

>MN: Find DOG in your pants. Name him Weiner, as he is a SAUSAGE DOG (aka a Daschund).

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There is no WEINER in your PANTS - oh, that was low.

>MN: Summon your faithful steed using your MEATY FIST as a STEED-WHISTLE. Guns can be used like that, right?

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Obviously. You simply have to puts your lips to the barrel and pull the MUSICAL TONE TRIGGER! Unfortunately, you are still not wielding your SHITTY AIRSOFT REVOLVER!

>MN: Stand up and put the pants back on your head.

>MN: Breath, Breath in the air. And don't be afraid to care.

>MN: quickly return your pants to their rightful place upon you, thereby covering you shame.

>MN: Shake fist angrily at neighbors

>MN: Stop fooling around, numbnuts! Go find your MEATY FIST!

>MN: Shake fist angrily at neighbors.

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You'd love to, but you are not currently in possession of the MEATY FIST!

>MN: Stop fooling around, numbnuts! Go find your MEATY FIST!

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Disregarding the rudeness of any voices you may or may not be hearing in your head, you get up and cross the street. Your SHITTY AIRSOFT REVOLVER is lying on the ground.

>MN: Anti-Disestablishmentarianism

>MN: Anti-Disestablishmentarianism.

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Actually, you've always been fairly opposed to state churches, making you an anti-anti-disestablishmentarianist.

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