Mall Fight RP: (CLOSED) (FINISHED)

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"THEN WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING HERE?"

I eat ice cream, because I might as well.

"Still dude, not exactly the best time."

Paddy the Second:
"THEN WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING HERE?"

"Telling you we should get the Hell out of here before-"

Bells ringing from miles away, towards the mountains where you made your descent. The sky changes to dusk, though the sun still shines brightly above you. The air is warm, though you consider it only an annoyance.

image
(noirlac)

"SO LONG GOOD LUCK BYE!"

The townsman runs off.

"OHMYFUCKINGGOD!" I leave a tulpa outside the door of the church and storm inside, barring the doors.

"HEY NARRATOR! GO FUCK YOURSELF!"

I flood the ice cream shoppe with boiling hot water.

Paddy the Second:
"HEY NARRATOR! GO FUCK YOURSELF!"

What? What did I do now?

MinimanZombie:
I flood the ice cream shoppe with boiling hot water.

Man, that's just fucked up.

"I'm used to it by now."

I head to the ice cream shoppe and start throwing paper aeroplanes at Salt's head.

"Why didn't you tell there was shit all to defend here before?"

The boiling water melts all the ice cream. "Dude, Zombie, that's just not cool, man."

Paddy the Second:
"Why didn't you tell there was shit all to defend here before?"

image
(noirlac)

It's two houses and a church along a river. You had to see this coming.

"Well, this date's going fan-fucking-tastic."

I lie on the floor. My tulpa stands outside the church tapping his feet.

I pat Salt on the back.
"All things considering, it probably could have gone worse for everyone involved. So... yeah."

"Hold on, you and Sister went here for a date? Wow, I learn new things every day."

I crash a plane into the Ice Cream store, imolating everyone in a 300-metre radius.

"That was news to you, Tox? Wow."
Then Sigma happens.
I respawn next to the wreckage.
"This is one example of what I was talking about, Salt. In case you hadn't guessed."

I respawn next to Trilby. "How would I have known? I haven't been here for like months, dude!"

"I dunno, I just assumed it had come up at some point when you were around because it's like the only thing Salt goes on about."

"Good point."

"I guess I can look on the bright side. At least I'm not Trilby."

I walk up to the ice cream shoppe.

"Aw man, I really wanted that sherbet!"

The ice cream shoppe respawns.

"Score."

Paddy the Second:
I lie on the floor. My tulpa stands outside the church tapping his feet.

Uh... Paddy?

"I placed the order for sherbet first, dude."

I flood it again, but this time with liquid nitrogen.

"... Damn you."

The ice cream is already frozen, numbnuts.

"Besides, handicapped. So I get precedent."

But the patrons were not.

>patrons

>people in the mall other than us

I am purely bamboozled.

"Oh god, that innocent couple who also just happened to be here was frozen solid."

The ice cream shoppe respawns, minus the nonexistent patrons.

I sneak in front of Salt and score all the sherbet.

"So, where the fuck's that sherbet?"

*mmm nom nom* "I dunno."

I lean over to RaN and steal some of the sherbet, eating it before he can put the blame on me.

"Why are you making eating noises if I got first dibs?"

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