Serial Killer Round 50: Vegas or DEATH! (IT'S OVER)

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With all these cardboard and Styrofoam sales, you'll need some packing peanuts to make sure your valuables aren't...damaged mid-transit-and holy S*** you guys are sword dueling?! I wanna join too!

*I drop my suitcase full of packing peanuts and pull out cutlass, jumping into the fray and swinging wildly.*

Mortis Nuncius:
I was prepared to defend my honor in a fair manner when zis cad decides to draw a pistol.

Now my actions seem less dishonorable, no?

"No."

*slashes at legs, ducks and steps back onto caltrop*

"Wait, is that no, yes or no, no?"

*Flings cardboard ninja stars at combatants from the shadows*

*leaps back to avoid slash and expertly shreds cardboard ninja stars*

"It was a no, yes, no?"

Time's up! The votes have been tallied!

Check your inboxes

*checks self for stab wounds and gun shot wounds*

It looks like I remain living, and as such I can continue selling our incredible cardboard products!

Looks at mirror.

Still not missing any body parts ^_^

MWAHAHAAHAHAAAAA! I live, you fools! I shall wreak havoc upon your souls!

Unless you buy cardboard from me...

That sounds like a good reason to buy cardboard. I will take seven cardboard please

*checks* aww no hanging yet?

Huh, guess I'm still in this race. Time to invest in cardboard stocks!

Loadsa carboard. Imma need loadsa carboard for my little project. Hehehehe.

*opens up a cardboard stand*

Come one come all to our new cardboard stand. Here we will sell you all of our high quality cardboard products. We also do special orders to those who pay up. So come on by and buy our stuff!

And if anyone EVER FUCKING THINKS about opening a competing store near us. I swear to Christ I will come over and fucking break your legs.

Well, I hope you're all happy. Better start putting your brains together now that mine's all over the floor.

staika:
*opens up a cardboard stand*

Come one come all to our new cardboard stand. Here we will sell you all of our high quality cardboard products. We also do special orders to those who pay up. So come on by and buy our stuff!

And if anyone EVER FUCKING THINKS about opening a competing store near us. I swear to Christ I will come over and fucking break your legs.

Malbourne:
Well, I hope you're all happy. Better start putting your brains together now that mine's all over the floor.

Cant help but see that this happened... looks like a short game for 50. If I die y'all better remember I said this. the styrofoam salesman is down, he tried to compete with cardboard. THEY KILLED HIM!

@Mem: Man got what he deserved. We don't take kindly to cheap packaging.

but your cardboard is sharp!

@Mem: I do believe that you are in error, my good sir. The cardboard business belongs to staika and myself. And we would never be so crass as to resort to guns. They lack the finesse of cardboard.

As for sharp cardboard, we do sell the blunt, zero-paper cut variety. We are quite confident of it's bluntness, we are. So much so, we will do a demonstration for you. Present your neck, if you please.

Second Cycle has started! ...And someone has been done in already.

Check your inboxes

Hurrah I survive to sell again!

@Schizzy: Quite right sir, a sharp piece of cardboard is much messier than a gun and much more elegant to use. A kill with cardboard strikes fear into the opponents side and shows them what happens to those who step to us.

And I see that you are showing off the new blunt cardboard. Perhaps we should show them the cardboard that's in the storage room.

Hmm not me.

Blunt cardboard you say? I would love to have a demonstration of that, but my neck is so fradgile right now, what with the killing going on. How about you use this watermelon here.

@Mem: How cute, you think you have a choice in the matter. But sadly for you you do not have a choice in the matter.

*grabs Mem to stop him from escaping*

Now you be a good test subject..... I mean presenter and stay still.

@Schizzy: Whenever you are ready sir.

*squirms* No! please I have won thousands of money! I will give you any of money you want!!

how much money do you want? five? seven? I will pay any amount of money up to twelve.

@staika: Quite so.

*slits Mem's throat*

There's an acute lack of blood coming from his neck. Why is that?

@Schizzy: that's an easy one, you used our special blunt cardboard which does not slice. Now shall we demonstrate our sharp cardboard so everyone can see the difference?

No please! No I will pay fifteen moneys!?!

@staika: My word, friend staika, so it is the blunt cardboard.

*Slips on Kevlar gloves with steel lining*

Wouldn't want to cut myself now, would I?

*Brandishes a ubiquitous piece of cardboard*

@Mem: here we have our very special You-won't-feel-a-thing-I-promise range of sharps. Very honest name, I must say. Most people don't realize being cut by one of these until DAYS later. Like so.

*Slices off Mem's left index finger, which curiously, doesn't fall off*

Two pieces of bad news.

First, I'm dead. I was the medic. Blah.

Second, my computer is on strike and I don't want to write on my phone. If I can get this situation resolved, there will be a short story following.

So the medic gave his life to protect my finger? Im okay with this :p

Will you take seventeen money to release me please?

No the medic is dead... *hides in her room*

Heh, read 'Blah' as 'Bish' and thought of Kendrick Lamaar and Money Trees. [/mullingrambles]

Well, this is most certainly an unfortunate turn of events. I mean most anyone dying is unfortunate, but a medic is definitely more so.

"Well, that's unfortunate."

*pokes Mortis in the side*

Link_to_Future has been killed. He was the Medic.

Y'all can just send in your votes now

@RaN: What was that for?

*pokes RaN back*

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