The Story of the Seven Deadly Sins (Closed, Started)

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The Story of the Seven Deadly Sins

Seven people wake up in the middle of an ancient temple. The floor and walls are of a dark-sand colored stone that is warm to the touch, and it is oddly light, despite having apparent source of light. However, as they look around, they find that there are no walls, the floor they stand on seems to be surrounded by an endless flow of lava. Somehow, they are not melting, but it is hot enough to be uncomfortable. They are not dressed very heavily, but rather in thin and dark cloaks that covers just enough. If there is a ceiling it is so high up that is cannot be seen or reached. Around them, there are a number of obelisks in different shapes and colors. All are made of stone, and between each pair of matching ones, there is a mirror into another world. Each of these is a trial, a level to clear. In the middle of the room, a circle is drawn, like that of alchemy, but for now, it only seems like a decoration. It is a strange and wondrous place, and none of them know why they are there.

Suddenly, a man appears in front of them. His face is obscured by a mask far too similar to a human face, and he is dressed in white. On his back, there are two broken bones sticking out, almost as if he used to have wings. His hair is long and blonde, almost white in color. He speaks.

They have all committed a grave sin, he tells them.

"Luxuria, Gula, Avaritia, Acedia, Ira, Superbia and Invidia. I have waited."

He lets the words hang in the air for a while. With a sinister grin he then explains that this is a special part of Hell, and that they have been chosen for a trial because of their past deeds. Should they succeed in passing all of the trials then they will be set free to the outside, and should they fail... well, that remains unsaid.

"Now, let the game begin."

Hello, I'm DarkRawen, this is a weird RP idea, but it might appeal to people. I do hope so, obviously. My Co-GM will be IFS, and I look forward to seeing how it will turn out.

Accepted Players:
Avaritia/Greed - Ruedyn
Ira/Wrath - VonKlaw
Superbia/Pride - cori
Luxuria/Lust - Terratina.
Acedia/Sloth - roushutsu
Invidia/Envy - Quintley
Gula/Gluttony - IFS

Hey everyone, I'm IFS your (hopefully) benevolent Co-GM. I will be attempting to give feedback on all the sheets (usually after Rawen has), if you would prefer that I do so via PM rather than in the thread say so in your post. I look forward to seeing what submissions we get.

There we go.

Let me know what you think (preferably in PM) and let me know if I need to change anything.

Shadowstar38:

Since you didn't specify, I'm assuming you want feedback here.

Anyways, I do have issues with this sheet. Firstly, a few minor things. The humans are wearing nothing under the cloaks as they are really not the person having been taken there, but the soul that has gone to hell after dying. Secondly, I don't really understand how Gula is supposed to use his power with a gem (Also, Gula is Orange, Not Blue, just a very minor thing) and several wires in the way. The mask over the eyes is also rather similar to what the sheet above yours have, so I would try to avoid it altogether if I were you. The personality is fine, perhaps a bit too wrathful, but that's more personal preferences.

So, then there's the power. Thing is, I don't really know how it would be useful for most things, as I'd need to know more about what happens when it takes a solid form. Can you form it? Is it really tough? Slimey? Basically, what is the uses for it?

The thing that troubles me the most is the backstory, though. I did say it should be more fantasy than real life, and that I would rather not have a lot of details when it comes to the setting. Since you've given not only a time, but a real place, it sort of seems a bit off compared to what I asked for. There is also the fact that while you've described what his deed was, you haven't really been clear on it. He was a cannibal hitman? How many people did he kill? And did he eat them alive, or kill them and then eat them? It's with the deed I really want the details.

I do hope this doesn't discourage you, I like the idea, but I need to make sure that 1. I have enough info to work with, and 2. it doesn't clash with the theme/setting/details of the RP.

Done, hopefully

Ruedyn:

There we go.

Looks good to me, I've got no complaints.

Shadowstar38:

My criticisms are basically the same as Rawens, so nothing new here.

So far, here is the deal:

Ruedyn:

VonKlaw:

You two have been accepted.

While you two:

cori:

Shadowstar38:

Will be accepted when/if you make the necessary changes and are approved by both of us.

cori:

Done, hopefully

Indeed you are, welcome aboard.

There it is. Be gentle. :P

Terratina.:

There it is. Be gentle. :P

Neither me nor IFS can see anything wrong with it. Welcome over to the dark side :P

Hope this works for ya.

roushutsu:

Hope this works for ya.

Most of it is good, I was counting on the sin of sloth to be a little less extreme than the others (since there's not a lot you can actually mess up when your sin is not doing anything, and I think Conrad messed up just about anything he could), but there's one thing that bothers me, which is the appearance. Basically, that they aren't actually wearing anything underneath the cloaks, since it's closed and long enough to cover everything it should cover, and because they aren't given any items apart from that one. Since your character has glasses, I would suggest working the gem into those.

roushutsu:

Hope this works for ya.

Looks pretty good to me, my only minor concern is that the crime isn't nearly as extreme as the others, but as Rawen said that's pretty hard to do with Sloth so it should be fine.

DarkRawen:
Most of it is good, I was counting on the sin of sloth to be a little less extreme than the others (since there's not a lot you can actually mess up when your sin is not doing anything, and I think Conrad messed up just about anything he could), but there's one thing that bothers me, which is the appearance. Basically, that they aren't actually wearing anything underneath the cloaks, since it's closed and long enough to cover everything it should cover, and because they aren't given any items apart from that one. Since your character has glasses, I would suggest working the gem into those.

IFS:
Looks pretty good to me, my only minor concern is that the crime isn't nearly as extreme as the others, but as Rawen said that's pretty hard to do with Sloth so it should be fine.

Yeah, coming up with his backstory was the most difficult part for me, especially since Sloth is more of a personal and spiritual sin, but I tweaked it a tad bit regardless. ^_^ Let me know if it needs any further adjustment.

roushutsu:

DarkRawen:
Most of it is good, I was counting on the sin of sloth to be a little less extreme than the others (since there's not a lot you can actually mess up when your sin is not doing anything, and I think Conrad messed up just about anything he could), but there's one thing that bothers me, which is the appearance. Basically, that they aren't actually wearing anything underneath the cloaks, since it's closed and long enough to cover everything it should cover, and because they aren't given any items apart from that one. Since your character has glasses, I would suggest working the gem into those.

IFS:
Looks pretty good to me, my only minor concern is that the crime isn't nearly as extreme as the others, but as Rawen said that's pretty hard to do with Sloth so it should be fine.

Yeah, coming up with his backstory was the most difficult part for me, especially since Sloth is more of a personal and spiritual sin, but I tweaked it a tad bit regardless. ^_^ Let me know if it needs any further adjustment.

I can't see anything else that's wrong with it, so you're in.

This seems like a really interesting concept!
Let me know if you want me to make adjustments (PM preferably)

Quintley:
This seems like a really interesting concept!
Let me know if you want me to make adjustments (PM preferably)

It looks good to me, and Rawen should have her comments up by tomorrow.

Since we're mostly waiting on a gluttony now I'm going to go ahead and mention that if none shows up in a few days then I will go ahead and make a gluttony sheet so we can get this thing started.

Quintley:
This seems like a really interesting concept!
Let me know if you want me to make adjustments (PM preferably)

I can't see anything bad, I assume it's okay to tell you here since the feedback is basically that it's good, and welcome aboard.

Ruedyn:

There we go.

VonKlaw:

Let me know what you think (preferably in PM) and let me know if I need to change anything.

cori:

Done, hopefully

Terratina.:

There it is. Be gentle. :P

roushutsu:

Hope this works for ya.

Quintley:
This seems like a really interesting concept!
Let me know if you want me to make adjustments (PM preferably)

Ok this is checking to see if you all are still interested, if you are then please respond in the forum or via PM. If everyone is still interested then I'll put together a gluttony sheet so we can begin.

IFS:

Ok this is checking to see if you all are still interested, if you are then please respond in the forum or via PM. If everyone is still interested then I'll put together a gluttony sheet so we can begin.

'Course I am! >:D

IFS:

Ruedyn:

Ok this is checking to see if you all are still interested, if you are then please respond in the forum or via PM. If everyone is still interested then I'll put together a gluttony sheet so we can begin.

Still here, being greedy.

IFS:

Ok this is checking to see if you all are still interested, if you are then please respond in the forum or via PM. If everyone is still interested then I'll put together a gluttony sheet so we can begin.

Still here and interested.

Ok this is checking to see if you all are still interested, if you are then please respond in the forum or via PM. If everyone is still interested then I'll put together a gluttony sheet so we can begin.

Yes still interested.

Ok this is checking to see if you all are still interested, if you are then please respond in the forum or via PM. If everyone is still interested then I'll put together a gluttony sheet so we can begin.

Yep! Been waiting and ready!

Apologies, I am still very interested but I will be away for a week (without internet access, gasp) starting at the end of this week and I don't want to let you guys down so I'm afraid I'll have to pull out.

cori:
Apologies, I am still very interested but I will be away for a week (without internet access, gasp) starting at the end of this week and I don't want to let you guys down so I'm afraid I'll have to pull out.

Honestly, I would prefer if you stayed. A week of absence could be explained in-game, and I have a feeling the best thing to do would be to get everyone together now, and start.

So, if you want to keep in, and don't mind making (or me making) an excuse for your absence, then we're good to go. Your character is pride, after all, she might not be interested in going along with the rest of the group at first, thinking they're below her, or something similar.

As I said, it's up to you.

And there is the gluttony sheet, I expect we'll begin shortly.

7 Sins

Seven people wake up in the middle of an ancient temple. The floor and walls are of a dark-sand colored stone that is warm to the touch, and it is oddly light, despite having apparent source of light. However, as they look around, they find that there are no walls, the floor they stand on seems to be surrounded by an endless flow of lava. Somehow, they are not melting, but it is hot enough to be uncomfortable. They are not dressed very heavily, but rather in thin and dark cloaks that covers just enough. If there is a ceiling it is so high up that is cannot be seen or reached. Around them, there are a number of obelisks in different shapes and colors. All are made of stone, and between each pair of matching ones, there is a mirror into another world. Each of these is a trial, a level to clear. In the middle of the room, a circle is drawn, like that of alchemy, but for now, it only seems like a decoration. It is a strange and wondrous place, and none of them know why they are there.

Suddenly, a man appears in front of them. His face is obscured by a mask far too similar to a human face, and he is dressed in white. On his back, there are two broken bones sticking out, almost as if he used to have wings. His hair is long and blonde, almost white in color. He speaks.

They have all committed a grave sin, he tells them.

"Luxuria, Gula, Avaritia, Acedia, Ira, Superbia and Invidia. I have waited."

He lets the words hang in the air for a while. With a sinister grin he then explains that this is a special part of Hell, and that they have been chosen for a trial because of their past deeds. Should they succeed in passing all of the trials then they will be set free to the outside, and should they fail... well, that remains unsaid.

"Now, let the game begin."

Game Start

The man in white gives them a short moment to be shocked, amazed, surprised, angry, just about any emotion might surface. No one speaks up, and he tilts his head.

"It seems you still have need of understanding this. It is very simple, allow me to give you a bit of the details. I am the one you refer to as "The devil", by the way. I prefer Lucifer, the Bringer of Light, personally, and this is a game of my own creation." His voice sounds almost excited, and he's clearly taking a sort of joy in it.

"There are 9 windows here, each a window to a new world, and a new level. None of the worlds are real, but I would advice you to act as if they were, else there might be unfortunate consequences." He motions for each of the "windows", 9 sets of different pairs of obelisks, between them what looks like a thin layer of glass, large enough to walk through. He places a gloved hand on one of them, showing it can easily be broken through. "You go inside, and you solve the problem. Choose wisely, because you cannot that easily get out from one once you've entered it. A solution is the only key. You have each been given a special power that can aid you, have fun with those." He chuckles, before continuing. "I would advice you to act carefully, everything can have a consequence. Now, for the rules." A piece of thin, fine paper appears in his hand, and he writes something on it. It soon turns into a scroll.

He opens it, and reads it out loud.

"Rule 1: Do not kill each other. If one of you dies, the levels will end up being unsolvable, and you will all lose by default.

Rule 2: You have all the time in the world. However, the world is ending fairly soon, so I would suggest moving fast so you can enjoy it.

Rule 3: You cannot bring anything from any of the worlds, as they are not real.

Rule 4: Do not try to escape, there is no way out apart from the way I have provided you with.

Rule 5: Lucifer lies a lot, and at least one of these rules are untrue.

Rule 6: Lucifer is fond of small kittens.

Rule 7: The rules might be updated according to Lucifer's whims."

He tosses the scroll to Luxuria, choosing her at seemingly random. If there is an intention behind it, he doesn't let it be known.

"And now I will take my leave, being the ruler over the eternal souls of most of humanity is busy. Any questions?" He lets no questions be asked, as he quickly continues.

"Magnificent. I will be rooting for you guys."

And then he's gone. They are left to their own accord, to explore and interact. However, if one of the rules are to be believed, their time is limited.

She caught the scroll, almost automatically.

Luxuria had studied the man in white carefully during his little speech. The initial statement just showed that he knew some Latin. The rest? Well... If that man was indeed the Devil, then that certainly changed things. She when to stroke her hair only to find that her head was covered by the hood of a dark cloak. Of course, there were more pressing matters. Such as that strange pressing sensation against her throat. She looked down to see a dark blue sapphire set in the center of a black choker. Well, this was quite a change of wardrobe for the mademoiselle wasn't? And this was quite the change of scenery as well. Luxuria had been told about how her so-called 'sins' would bring her to Hell. She had never imagined that to be true.

Composure not cracked, she turned to the others, "Shall... we start?"

"Wait. These rules make no sense."

Ira thought about what had just happened, unsure if he wasn't merely dreaming but deciding to play along anyway.

"He states, as a rule, that at least one of the rules are untrue. But if that very rule is untrue, then all the rules may be untrue and we are merely doing ourselves a dis-service by blindly following them..."

Ira shook his head, increasingly certain that this must be some form of deluded nightmare. He had read much of the devil, and was fairly certain that he did not like kittens, nor would he joke about such things. The whole idea of writing rules that could be untrue was an absurd idea he could barely comprehend.

"At least one...which might mean all of them anyway. Have you even checked whats actually on the scroll?"

Ira shook his head again.

"We need to think this through. Properly."

While he listened, "Acedia," as he was now called, continuously shifted his weight from one side to the other, swaying slowly before he decided to simply sit down on the warm ground. Upon kneeling, he noted the dark robe he was now swathed in. He reached to adjust his glasses when he felt something small brush against his cheek--a thin chain attached to the right frame. Dangling off the end of the chain was a tiny light blue crystal. Where did that come from? he thought to himself.

He simply sat and listened to Lucifer explain these "rules," rolling the crystal in fingers. Now that he sat in his presence, he wondered just what was the big deal about him. Wasn't he supposed to be some kind of scary, grotesque monster?

"Why bother" he asked after the devil had taken his leave. "Didn't one of those rules mention that we should hurry because the world was going to end? Why should that matter to us at this point?"

The conversation was distracting, enough to cut through the bewilderment. The masked man's words had been almost as confusing as the surroundings - souls? New worlds? The names, too, were difficult to place. Except for the last - Invidia - that was her, she was certain.
There had been another name, though. Why couldn't she remember?

She pulled the hood low over her eyes and glared at the tall man who had been shaking his head.

"You're surprised that the rules don't make sense?" she muttered under her breath. "None of this makes any sense."

'Avaritia' was too busy with his new clothes to really notice much of what the man in white had said. It'd never compare to his noble finery, he'd rather go nude if he could. He was certainly pretty fucking warm. His necklace ,the one thing he liked thus far, fascinated him endlessly, although the craftsmanship was shoddy and the jewel was the only thing remarkable, and even then he probably had 10 of the things. A droll item to accompany him.

His ears perked up a bit when he heard the thing in white call himself the Devil, Lucifer. It was not his religion, but hadn't he heard Hell was his punishment as well? Suppose once you give a being a whole underworld, he'd conquer it eventually...

He agreed with the skeptic, Ira, though he couldn't see a ceiling and the floor was literally lava. As an afterlife, he found himself thoroughly unimpressed. Throwing off my hood, I look at the rest of my group. A lazy bastard was already losing hope, and a girl was mumbling to herself. The one who had the scroll must've been special in some way, he'd keep an eye on... without voices, Greed realized he had no idea what gender these people were. Cloaks were no fun, he'd have to see if anyone else would act on his nudity idea.

"Right-oh, a bunch of puzzles for another crack at life before the end? I wonder if maybe I hug a few more puppies if I'd get to a place a bit more... pearly." Greed smirks at his own joke, and he looks at one of the mirrors. A few puzzles and he'd be free again? This was going to be fun.

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