Zero Punctuation: Halo: Reach

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"Same guns, same story, same enemies, same levels with a few minor tweaks and adjustments."

Yup. That completely describes my single player experience too.
What's really funny about the whole "space combat" thing? UT2004 did this Six fucking years ago. and it was just about as good to boot.

"Jet packs?" Tribes did it far better 10 years ago.

The other abilities are a reasonably cool mish-mash of the other Tribes 2 Pack equips, but with refined gameplay enhancements to bring them into the modern era (for those who couldn't tell, it's the one part of the game I actually like). Armor Lock is much more useful than I thought it would be, and the Bubble Shield is basically a "I've got a shotgun, and I will man-rape you with it regardless of your wishes."

However, this leads into my main problem with Reach, and Halo in general: It was built from the ground up to be multiplayer and multiplayer ONLY. If you aren't jumping online, you are essentially wasting your money unless you happen to love the story.

The Firefight mode was only able to hold my attention for so long; fun as it was initially I eventually got tired of it since every encounter turned into "Snipe snipe snipe, swap, grenade, spam spam, melee, retreat, reload, repeat".

So for me, the only good thing to come out of Reach is that it looked pretty damn good on my new 55 inch TV.

For those ready to improperly wield the hypocrite card ("If you didn't like it, why did you play it?" My favorite circular-logic chestnut) no, I don't own the game. I would never willingly part with my money for a Halo title; every other gamer on the planet owns it by now, and a few of those many people happen to be my friends.

I liked the link at the end to the halo 3 review way back when; using the beatles song.

I'm surprise he actually reviewed it, not that it makes any difference to me; I'm PS3 all the way!

Not a huge fan of the series, everything that came after Combat Evolved just sucked majorly, although Halo 3 multiplayer was decent.

Great vid, didn't expect him to enjoy it.

HankMan:
I played this game and I can think a whole number of reasons why I didn't like besides it being a Halo game:
Limited weapon selection
Over-powered pistol not having enough amo
paints-on-head-retarded driving mechanics
Brain damaged friendly A.I.
Only getting two grenades at a time
Power shield won't let you move
stamina worn out faster than a fat man on a thigh master

God damn it -_-

You started with really good reasons... I don't mind if you don't like limited selection.
The pistol can't possibly be overpowered if it doesn't have enough ammo. That's called balancing. Do you see how that works?
Fair enough, you don't like the driving.
Every game has retarded A.I so that's not really an issue considering they're better than most.
Fair enough, you want more grenades.
Try a drop shield. It's called armor lock for a reason.
The sprint could do with a faster recharge but the amount seems fine to me.

Then you ruined it...

Oh Wait, That IS a Halo game

Wow, he didn't hate it totally, I must now go out and buy a 360 and track down every previous Halo game...

Nah, I have Halo 1 for PC, and it's kinda ok, but didn't make me desperate for more.

The bit about aircraft with side doors open is actually fairly realistic, military helicopters often fly like that with guys hang out the side, and I have no idea why.

Needless pop against PS Move though. I've not bought it myself, but I don't rule out getting it in the near future if I find some good reason other than re-playing Heavy Rain, which isn't quite enough to justify the cost.

EightGaugeHippo:

YoungZer0:

EightGaugeHippo:
I just noticed he didnt say anything was terible. A few flaws, But nothing major.

That's because Bungie never really changed anything in the whole run of the series. You can't complain about things that have been shit in the first one, since they have became part of the franchise.

Yeah, but Bungie has changed things. Halo 1 is very different to Halo Reach. Oh wait sorry, they still have sheilds and space marines and a few of the same weapons, thats the formula for shitness apparently.

I played Halo 1 a few days before i gave Reach a try. The Art-Direction is a lot darker.

That's it.

I'll pick it up eventually, after I buy a few games I want more:
Penumbra: Black Plague
Amnesia: The Dark Descent
Splinter Cell: Conviction
Possibly Just Cause 2
(Even if reach is better than all of these, I don't care. I love being horrified, and heard Black Plague and Amnesia are the best, Sam Fisher is one of my favorite characters and it looks a bit more action based stealth than "Be stealthy or die in two bullets" approach of the previous games, and I like grappling hooks, blowing things up, and jumping out of a helicopter onto a mountain and pulling the parachute at the last second so I roll all the way down the mountain and get up as if I haven't just broken every bone in my body.)

Scrotum monsters are scary.

I did watch the ending level after I watched the review and i feels a lot like Kerrigan's death from the end of starcraft 1.

Like nailing me thoughts to a wall ... or video :D
It is a completely OK game, it is slap bang in the middle of average, nothing wrong with it, but nothing that would make you love it either.
In fact this is the only game I ever fell asleep while playing, which is quite an achievement.

And this being the last Halo... yeah right, MS will ride that dirty old w*ore till her bones crumble.

I'm going to throw in my 2 cents and demand a sequel to Oni as well.

Nothing like doing a spinning neck snap on a poor bastard, then sliding, whipping out a plasma rifle and blasting another guy in the face before bouncing up and throat punching someone else.

Damn that game was cool.

Wow, yahtzee found a halo game to be ok... on single player alone.... holy shit

I was surprised Yahtzee didnt slate this too much. I felt ripped off after i bought it and on normal setting on first playthrough had completed it in 5 hours, and I'm not even that good at fps. The story moves way too fast and half the time the link between missions didn't seem to make any sense. I liked halo and thought halo 3 was ok, but feel let down by Halo Reach

Silly Yahtzee... Spartans wear suits of magnetic armour, with magnetic gloves, magnetic boots, and magnetic bum-plates. That's why they can get away with not using seatbelts :P

And i am slightly less amazed than everyone else, but still pretty amazed that he was so un-hateful to the game.

See it's the multiplayer part that actually pissed me off. If he wants to hate on it he should play the maps. They're all strictly rehashes of old levels or taken straight from the levels. There is absolutely no creativity in them, which is not what I have come to expect from Bungie. Also, I'm glad he pointed out the ending because that for me was the only real redeeming quality of the entire story. I wasn't really moved by anything that happened, nor was I ever really when it comes to the Halo saga, but the ending where I was fighting for my life really hit home and I actually was like, "Yes, this is fun! The story makes sense now!".

Anyways, good insight as always! Makes hump-day that much more enjoyable!

JaredXE:
I am frankly amazed that Yahtzee did this, considering how bleh he was about Halo 3 and Halo Wars.

Also, I LIKED Oni.

The world needs another Oni, damn that game was awesome!

Kollega:
Silly Yahtzee... Spartans wear suits of magnetic armour, with magnetic gloves, magnetic boots, and magnetic bum-plates. That's why they can get away with not using seatbelts :P

And i am slightly less amazed than everyone else, but still pretty amazed that he was so un-hateful to the game.

Actually, (I may be wrong) they do have magnetic components in their armor..its how they "holster" their weapons when not in use :P

Also, they are quite heavy too 1/2 ton so it makes sense that they wouldn't have to strap in. (Also, people don't even do that in real life). I was amazed too that he wasn't as venomous towards it as I expected...pleasantly surprised though.

Yahtzee, that's what they took "Combat Evolved" out of all the future Halos.

Yahtzee...didn't...hate...a Halo game? AWESOME.

The armor lock is EXTREMELY useful online, but, of course, Yatzee won't ever play that. Anyway, he does make a few good points and he wasn't as hyperbolic as I thought he would be. The Combat Evolved thing is actually kind of funny. It was only put there on the first Halo because Microsoft didn't think a name like Halo would sell.

So:

Yahtzee, that's what they took "Combat Evolved" out of all the future Halos.

I know you're being sarcastic but that isn't why. Apparently Microsoft figured out that people like Halo and the name, so there was no need for a subhead.

That's pretty much exactly what I was expecting.

HankMan:

Tenkage:
Ok that is fair, he destroy the game but he didn't hate it, so That must mean this is one of the best shooter games on the market, I mean come on if Yahtzee can enjoy it almost anyone can LOL

Almost anyone

GamesB2:
Ha brilliant.

To everyone complaining about Halo Reach because it is a Halo game.

Bad _ Very bad... you go learn stuff before commenting.

I played this game and I can think a whole number of reasons why I didn't like besides it being a Halo game:
Limited weapon selection
Over-powered pistol not having enough amo
paints-on-head-retarded driving mechanics
Brain damaged friendly A.I.
Only getting two grenades at a time
Power shield won't let you move
stamina worn out faster than a fat man on a stair master

Oh Wait, That IS a Halo game

Ok I'm sorry, you clearly haven't played this game...(or at least completed it)

Halo has Always had a vast weapon selection.

The over powered pistol (as you call it) doesn't have a lot of ammo because it's only a pistol and does quite a bit of damage, if it had more ammo then it would be over powered.

The driving mechanics have Always been the same, and are probably some of the best in any shooter.

Ok i admit, the A.I isn't very good, but then again, it never has been.

You acctualy get 4 grenades at a time. (2 frags, 2 Plasma Grenades, you know...the sticky blue things that scream while blowing up?)

If you could move while the power shield was active, it would be very over powered.

And if you wore heavy body armour you would not be able run for long either.

JacobyPAX:
People don't need seat belts in Halo because of artificial gravity and/or some other advanced and vague technology.

Ha, I would have argued that they don't need seat belts because their armor weighs a ton. A falcon would need to be doing loop d loops to get them to shift.

You... just don't do the research, do you?

A) It is not the last Halo game. 343 Studios is currently working on the next one (although it isn't Bungie, I'm still looking forward to seeing what the new guys can pull off).

B) You reviewed Halo Wars, correct? Go back, look at when that took place. 2531 I believe. Then look at when Halo Reach takes place. 2552. Start of the Human-Covenant War, you say? At the very least, if you're going to give an opinion on a story, get the details right. It isn't that hard.

C) The fact that you constantly say that a game's single player should allow a game to stand on it's own is, in this day and age of gaming, wrong. If a game just has single player? Damn right it should. No denying that. If it has both? Unless one mode is infinitely greater than the other (see: Metroid Prime 2... I think we can all agree that multiplayer was just pointless) both parts of a game need to be taken into account. I actually have a shit-load of issues with Halo: Reach. The story flow is sub-par compared to ODST, some of the mission designs are atrocious (that mission with the Falcon over New Alexandria is my own personal hell, it's boring, and there seems to be no real reason behind it) and, worst of all, the music isn't half as memorable as Halo Wars. Pile that on top of a multitude of visual bugs that haven't been nearly as prevelant in previous Halo games (EDIT: Except Halo 2), and that's fucking pathetic. But I still consistently enjoy Halo: Reach more than the other Halo game because of the multiplayer. If it wasn't for that, and if it was like ODST again and had no real multiplayer mode, I'd be fucking pissed (though I loved ODST for it's campaign, story, and soundtrack). And I'm usually not that into multiplayer games.

You can't deny part of a game simply because you don't usually play it if you're reviewing it. You just can't. It's pathetic. It's amateurish.

Seriously, I don't understand why people look to you for anything but overused criticisms about "repetetive gameplay" (fitting thing for you to constantly repeat, though, I suppose) and bad words and jokes that you've used time and time again.

Then again, maybe they don't anymore, and I'm just reading too much into things.

Either way, I agree on the seatbelt thing...

EDIT: Bit of trivia here for you, the "Combat Evolved" subtext to the original Halo's title was absolutely despised by the developers. Microsoft was just too afraid people would think the title is some super-religious reference. Put "Combat Evolved" in there, and BAM, people are intrigued rather than put off. Or at least, that was their mindset.

arc1991:

HankMan:

Tenkage:
Ok that is fair, he destroy the game but he didn't hate it, so That must mean this is one of the best shooter games on the market, I mean come on if Yahtzee can enjoy it almost anyone can LOL

Almost anyone

GamesB2:
Ha brilliant.

To everyone complaining about Halo Reach because it is a Halo game.

Bad _ Very bad... you go learn stuff before commenting.

I played this game and I can think a whole number of reasons why I didn't like besides it being a Halo game:
Limited weapon selection
Over-powered pistol not having enough amo
paints-on-head-retarded driving mechanics
Brain damaged friendly A.I.
Only getting two grenades at a time
Power shield won't let you move
stamina worn out faster than a fat man on a stair master

Oh Wait, That IS a Halo game

Ok I'm sorry, you clearly haven't played this game...(or at least completed it)

Halo has Always had a vast weapon selection.

The over powered pistol (as you call it) doesn't have a lot of ammo because it's only a pistol and does quite a bit of damage, if it had more ammo then it would be over powered.

The driving mechanics have Always been the same, and are probably some of the best in any shooter.

Ok i admit, the A.I isn't very good, but then again, it never has been.

You acctualy get 4 grenades at a time. (2 frags, 2 Plasma Grenades, you know...the sticky blue things that scream while blowing up?)

If you could move while the power shield was active, it would be very over powered.

And if you wore heavy body armour you would not be able run for long either.

Damn straight...I agree with everything here and will add that I can actually drive all the vehicles in Halo...you put me in a chopper in Battlefield Bad Company 2 and I fly that as well as a cow attached to a kite (i.e. we are going down fast and not from enemy fire)...Halo has simplified controls but hey...you don't want 50 different controls to get something done when under fire.

arc1991:

HankMan:

Tenkage:
Ok that is fair, he destroy the game but he didn't hate it, so That must mean this is one of the best shooter games on the market, I mean come on if Yahtzee can enjoy it almost anyone can LOL

Almost anyone

GamesB2:
Ha brilliant.

To everyone complaining about Halo Reach because it is a Halo game.

Bad _ Very bad... you go learn stuff before commenting.

I played this game and I can think a whole number of reasons why I didn't like besides it being a Halo game:
Limited weapon selection
Over-powered pistol not having enough amo
paints-on-head-retarded driving mechanics
Brain damaged friendly A.I.
Only getting two grenades at a time
Power shield won't let you move
stamina worn out faster than a fat man on a stair master

Oh Wait, That IS a Halo game

Ok I'm sorry, you clearly haven't played this game...(or at least completed it)

Halo has Always had a vast weapon selection.

The over powered pistol (as you call it) doesn't have a lot of ammo because it's only a pistol and does quite a bit of damage, if it had more ammo then it would be over powered.

The driving mechanics have Always been the same, and are probably some of the best in any shooter.

Ok i admit, the A.I isn't very good, but then again, it never has been.

You acctualy get 4 grenades at a time. (2 frags, 2 Plasma Grenades, you know...the sticky blue things that scream while blowing up?)

If you could move while the power shield was active, it would be very over powered.

And if you wore heavy body armour you would not be able run for long either.

See this is exactly what i meant by my last comment. Bungies previous mistakes are repeating and are now a feature, if you play a Halo game you have to expect bad AI and all that. They don't improve, they don't change. Playing it as save and ball-less as possible. Which is exactly why i don't respect Bungie. I hope they really are done with this overrated franchise and might finally make a game that's worth playing. Although i liked ONI i'd love to see them do something new.

Also: It's not a bodyarmor, it's an exoskeleton, it should improve speed and strength.

YoungZer0:

EightGaugeHippo:

YoungZer0:

EightGaugeHippo:
I just noticed he didnt say anything was terible. A few flaws, But nothing major.

That's because Bungie never really changed anything in the whole run of the series. You can't complain about things that have been shit in the first one, since they have became part of the franchise.

Yeah, but Bungie has changed things. Halo 1 is very different to Halo Reach. Oh wait sorry, they still have sheilds and space marines and a few of the same weapons, thats the formula for shitness apparently.

I played Halo 1 a few days before i gave Reach a try. The Art-Direction is a lot darker.

That's it.

A few days before you played reach? Let me ask you some thing. was that your first time or did you ever play Halo 1 when it was new?

Dfskelleton:
Splinter Cell: Conviction

That game is shockingly fantastic. You won't be disapointed, unless you REALLY liked the way the previous games played, because the control scheme has been simplified to an extreme.

Eh, better than I expected (And I don't think he used the word "Average" once...wow).

I still question his refusal to acknowledge that multi-player can in fact be the "main part" of a game, and that he's essentially ignoring a very sizeable chunk of the product, but meh, he's yahtzee, he makes funny.

I laughed a bit, agreed with a couple points (seriously, why no seat-belts!?) and disagreed with a few others, but it was still a funny video, so I can't complain.

Now we just have to weather the incoming storm of Halo-related threads that are soon to follow.

lol @ gay-lo reach around

Haha, that true about the seat-belts. Wait........ He didn't hate it??? Well, good for you Yahtzee. You have gotten past where you call a game shit simply because you hated it before you even played it.

This is great. The entire comments to this video is filled with people flaming each other about weather Halo is good or not, who are probably all going to get suspended somewhere down the line of these arguments. Just play the damn game and either like it or dislike it. NO ONE on either side of the argument is going to change their mind at this point.

YoungZer0:

arc1991:

HankMan:

Tenkage:
Ok that is fair, he destroy the game but he didn't hate it, so That must mean this is one of the best shooter games on the market, I mean come on if Yahtzee can enjoy it almost anyone can LOL

Almost anyone

GamesB2:
Ha brilliant.

To everyone complaining about Halo Reach because it is a Halo game.

Bad _ Very bad... you go learn stuff before commenting.

I played this game and I can think a whole number of reasons why I didn't like besides it being a Halo game:
Limited weapon selection
Over-powered pistol not having enough amo
paints-on-head-retarded driving mechanics
Brain damaged friendly A.I.
Only getting two grenades at a time
Power shield won't let you move
stamina worn out faster than a fat man on a stair master

Oh Wait, That IS a Halo game

Ok I'm sorry, you clearly haven't played this game...(or at least completed it)

Halo has Always had a vast weapon selection.

The over powered pistol (as you call it) doesn't have a lot of ammo because it's only a pistol and does quite a bit of damage, if it had more ammo then it would be over powered.

The driving mechanics have Always been the same, and are probably some of the best in any shooter.

Ok i admit, the A.I isn't very good, but then again, it never has been.

You acctualy get 4 grenades at a time. (2 frags, 2 Plasma Grenades, you know...the sticky blue things that scream while blowing up?)

If you could move while the power shield was active, it would be very over powered.

And if you wore heavy body armour you would not be able run for long either.

See this is exactly what i meant by my last comment. Bungies previous mistakes are repeating and are now a feature, if you play a Halo game you have to expect bad AI and all that. They don't improve, they don't change. Playing it as save and ball-less as possible. Which is exactly why i don't respect Bungie. I hope they really are done with this overrated franchise and might finally make a game that's worth playing. Although i liked ONI i'd love to see them do something new.

Actually, I find the enemy AI to be great... The team AI... Not so much. Learn to drive idiots!

EightGaugeHippo:

YoungZer0:

EightGaugeHippo:

YoungZer0:

EightGaugeHippo:
I just noticed he didnt say anything was terible. A few flaws, But nothing major.

That's because Bungie never really changed anything in the whole run of the series. You can't complain about things that have been shit in the first one, since they have became part of the franchise.

Yeah, but Bungie has changed things. Halo 1 is very different to Halo Reach. Oh wait sorry, they still have sheilds and space marines and a few of the same weapons, thats the formula for shitness apparently.

I played Halo 1 a few days before i gave Reach a try. The Art-Direction is a lot darker.

That's it.

A few days before you played reach? Let me ask you some thing. was that your first time or did you ever play Halo 1 when it was new?

I played it the first time it was released. Played Halo 2 the first time it was released. Didn't care for 3, Wars or ODST. Reach looked different, except it wasn't.

lilmizzazle:
I am actuly amused over the fact that yahtzee actuly "liked" a game that has been wanked so much upon now the last years! does this prove that bungie are indeed gods?

This isn't the first hugely popular game that he's said good things about. The two that come to mind are Call of Duty 4 and Arkham Asylum.

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