Zero Punctuation: Braid

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The enphasis on dick jokes was spot-on.

So much dick jokes
Creepy...

Review was entertaining but all these random rants now seemed like hes trying too hard. Does he really need to tell us the first 1 min or so about how gamers are 'ruining' the industry because they do not buy what yahtzee or [insert name of picky-for-the-sake-of-it gamer] cannot measure all games with the same elitest stick? Sure its not good if FIFA <[insert year]> sells millions while masterpieces like Okami sell very little but so what that is real life, people are free to buy what they want to enjoy.

I enjoy games across all spectrums like Gears and Halo as well as Okami, Beyond Good & Evil and Psychonauts etc. It is all about being in the right mindset - dont expect to be wowed by the art or story in Gears and conversly don't expect to be shooting stuff in Ico. Just take it as it is unless the game insists it is trying to be something it is not (or failed to do).

I value innovation and diversity too but I just don't act like a twat about it. But I guess thats his act. I am just wary of gamers trying to emluate his style only to end up with a generation of gamers acting like complete dicks with a 1 dimensional attitude towards entertainment mediums.

I think you're trying too hard.

Never heard of Braid before now but entertaining review all the same. The birdy to the Yanks brought a smile to my face.

There have been pikachu condoms in Japan in the past o.o....

Yahtzee Croshaw:
... Piss off! Close the browser and fuck off back to Gears of War!... Has he gone?! - Good, I hate that guy! ...

Good to know that somebody else hates 'that guy' as well!

Just a few days ago I realized that my PC isn't even fast enough to fluently decode videos anymore - and by 'decode' I mean PLAY! The 720p XVID videos which seem to become standard around the intertubes totally hog the CPU at 100% load when the action starts.
It makes me feel so damn yesteryear! O_o

Nice review, and nice Heroes reference.
Actually, you really can hear a strong edge of hatred in his voice. That's how you know he's not just going for cheap laughs.

PS. Loved the comment about the Princess being the atomic bomb.

HalfShadow:
Puzzle games are for people who suck at everything else.

By your logic the majority of gamers suck at everything, since the majority of gamers enjoyed Portal.

Although I enjoy Yahtzee's reviews I do think they're usually extremely harsh and nitpicking...sometimes for the sake of being funny.

I any case, though I usually tend to disagree from his reviews at some point...this time I have to agree.

Braid's virtues and flaws have been accurately described. Among the flaws, the breaking key mechanic feels cheap and the repetition of puzzles as well; and the "open-to-interpretation" narrative combined with the joke metaphor illustrated exactly how I feel.

Funny he didn't point out games are even cheaper in his original country of origin... Great review however!

As for Braid, I played the demo and is was good but even though I CAN RIGHT NOW buy and pay it due to my obscue amount of free points I've amassed over last year I won't at this point in time... why? Well of course theres the fact I want to finish other games first but there is still hype. Hype is what can turn me off a game (hence why I avoid everything about GTA int he previews before buying it) but what can really turn me off a game is when its hype for reasons beyond that of gaming... art... Now I was all ok with Shadow of the Colossus for example until the end, to put it blunt I did not like the ending... AT ALL. Yet that didn't stop me from enjoying the game before but it was along time until I did to shake off all those irritating screams of passion from its forums where most users don't understand the word, let alone the concept of opinions. I have a feeling Braid will follow suit. Its like me degrading my Wii when visitors see it to distance myslf from the nobs in TV adverts. The only time this hasn't been the case was with Bioshock... because it had core gameplay along with all the style blah blah blah. Although given Braid IS an indie game prehaps I'll give it a shot sooner.

Meh, even though you can see flaws in the industry, its no way near as bad as Japanese exclusive games industry *shudders*. I think Yahtzee can agree with me there.

we need more games like the Braid.

MEXICAN GRUNT:
we need more games like the Braid.

You're going to have to expand on that one as not everyone like platformers and/or puzzles... don't worry though, I know what you mean... in theory.

I don't know if calling the "breaking key" thing a "dick move" is really fair. It's completely based on the time mechanics and whether a given door or key can be reversed. It isn't arbitrary at all and thinking through what will happen logically before trying to open a door will always reveal what will happen if you do. I remember being irritated at having to reset a room once or twice during the game but that rarely took more than a few seconds. Compared to the minutes it can take to reload a level because of something totally arbitrary that happens in most games it's really a very small inconvenience.

Wow, I'm shocked, nothing felt forced and it just sounded like yahtzee "back in the day" but in better quality, good job Yahtzee, this is what makes your reviews good and fun to watch.

I too blame the mainstream gamers for causing the perpetual decay of video games these days.

I feel sorry for all the Adrien's out there.

Overall nice review but i don't think I'll be playing a game with random key breaking except if it has a secondary sledgehammer option.

Awesome, just awesome! Great review, Yahtzee! Looking forward to more, as always. :)

Whe the helll is he going to review Blood Curse?

That was one of your best yet.

btw if your talking about the 4th lvl two doors (in reference to the dick move thing) its trying to show that door only upon while traveling right because traveling right make time go forward while traveling left uses the key but doesn't upon the door because your traveling backwards in time.

___

ounce again awesome review i felt the same on the story, as if it was trying to be artsy so it said a bunch of things that didnt make that much sense but made people interpret the end on there own, which is some what...lazy.

YYZed:
That was one of your best yet.

btw if your talking about the 4th lvl two doors (in reference to the dick move thing) its trying to show that door only upon while traveling right because traveling right make time go forward while traveling left uses the key but doesn't upon the door because your traveling backwards in time.

___

ounce again awesome review i felt the same on the story, as if it was trying to be artsy so it said a bunch of things that didnt make that much sense but made people interpret the end on there own, which is some what...lazy.

I think the justification of bad gameplay in rationalsing meaning got old in Sons of Liberty.

Bombader:

Funny it's not really an "Indie" game when they had the income of a high budget hit, I didn't know that.

It is not the budget that defigns an "indie game", it is the creative controll given to its makers. Games that are defined by their buget are "buget games". They tend to be crappy since creative controll is in the hands of a marketing department who doesn't care what happens after the point of sale. So long as an acceptable percentage of players don't return the software, and nobody looses their buisness license for false advertizing, the disigners of "buget games" could care less how the game plays. I'm looking at you "eXtream" sieries.

Indigo_Dingo:
I think the justification of bad gameplay in rationalsing meaning got old in Sons of Liberty.

No seriously, the way Yahtzee says it implies that you have to make a random choice between two doors, one right, one wrong. The real reason it's annoying is because unlike every other part in the game, rewinding won't help you adn you have to restart. The actual solution is just as logical and puzzle based as any other part of the game.

Geo Da Sponge:

Indigo_Dingo:
I think the justification of bad gameplay in rationalsing meaning got old in Sons of Liberty.

No seriously, the way Yahtzee says it implies that you have to make a random choice between two doors, one right, one wrong. The real reason it's annoying is because unlike every other part in the game, rewinding won't help you adn you have to restart. The actual solution is just as logical and puzzle based as any other part of the game.

And since when does Yahtzee ever let logic or reality get in the way of him bashing a game?

Miniges:
Well it's nice to hear he has a girlfriend...

Not for long he won't, by the sound of it...

HalfShadow:
Puzzle games are for people who suck at everything else.

Actually, I find puzzle games more fun than FPSs, MMOs, and most of the other game genres out there. Mostly because I have to use my BRAIN to succeed at them. Perhaps you're just a little sore you weren't very good at tetris when you were a little boy :(

Hello all. I'm a first time poster but long time viewer signing up solely for ZP Forum! (suck it) Briefly; I'm Danny, Male, 24 yrs, Yorkshire, England (PC/Nintendo/Sega lover)

I enjoyed this edition a lot more than the previous few. I agree that it seems Yahtzee's fire died down a little, but he returned in great form this week. Back to his usual tricks, as it were.

I personally think that everyone complaining at his rant at the start should just fuck right off. At the end of the day, this is a little something known as SOMEONE ELSE'S OPINION. Just because it's not your own, doesn't mean you have to cry about it.

I'm a big fan of the Final Fantasy series (and a Wii owner :P) and a lot of these reviews should send me home crying (if I apply the typical mentality from the negative posters) but I watch and enjoy them because it's the well informed, intelligent and humorous opinion of a gamer who likes games because he likes them and who isn't afraid to point out if something's shit and tell you WHY it's shit. NOT your typical gamer that 'likes' games because every other prick and their dog does and they don't want to feel left out.

If the review consisted of some smug gimp in a shirt and tie telling you why you should fork out your hard earned cash for some piece of crap that you practically just bought 2 weeks ago with a different protagonist and 3 different guns by simply saying "10 out of 10", it'd be pretty pointless and I wouldn't watch it........because it would be like EVERY review written/filmed today whether that's games, films, music or anything.

Nothing is actually reviewed anymore. Instead, everything is WHORED to the high heavens, except on here. And the fact that a reviewer is willing to express their personal views on a culture gone wrong WITHIN their weekly slot in a constructive manner just puts a smile on my face and pitches a tent in my pants each and every week.

Sorry that I've gone on a little, but I felt that it had to be said. I got pissed off aaaaages ago when some people complained that one edition had "too much political stuff" in it. I think it was re: Resident Evil 5.

Chalk another up for the annoying folks that only register on here for the ZP forum and keep up the good work.

Take it easy all,

Danny

anti_strunt:

Miniges:
Well it's nice to hear he has a girlfriend...

Not for long he won't, by the sound of it...

Hmm. I thought he was speaking of a metaphorical girlfriend, since he usually avoids making much reference to the details of his personal life. Plus, he's not quite hot enough to pick up chicks with his cynicism.

Lol, Yahtzee; Too stupid to figure out one of the puzzles, and then complains about a key and door puzzle as if it's an arbitrary and random solution.

Protip Yahtzee - If you move to the left on the stage where time moves backwards, if you open a door, it won't change the future because you're going back in time.

Next time you attempt to criticize a game, at least be sure it's a failure of the game and not of your brain. Rethink your brain density statement.

This was awesome. You finally brought up the fact that it is people who buy games that determine what gets put on the market. I couldn't agree more.

jedikv:
I am just wary of gamers trying to emluate his style only to end up with a generation of gamers acting like complete dicks with a 1 dimensional attitude towards entertainment mediums.

I'm afraid this has been going on for years. Take out "gamers" and put in "moviegoers" and we're talking decades. Put in "art aficionadoes" instead? Centuries. 'Tis part of the human condition to be pinky-up-the-nostril retarded about what composes "art".

Also, sadly, I know no one named Adrian to show this video to. Perhaps I should consult the phone book and make a new friend!

Great Review! If my name was Adrian I would have been quite shocked, although I still laughed my head off :)

Yeah man. Gears Of War. Is. Shit.

ReverseEngineered:
Not a bad review, though I was somewhat disappointed that he tried to garner so much negativity when he admitted that he actually liked the game. If he liked it so much, why focus on the nitpicking?

Ripping a bad game is hilarious, but bitching about nitpicks is just annoying. Just like the Portal review, it's okay to say, "Finally, a game that did something right."

But "Finally, a game that did something right" isn't funny. At least, I'm not laughing.

Once again Yahtzee exposes his retardation in regards to the level where the key will only open one door. I had to think about it for 30 seconds to realize that time flows backwards when you walk to the left which is why you can't open a door from the right then just walk through it.

Every episode has some equally glaring misobservation, and the guy should really play the games for more than 5 minutes before he writes his bits about them.

sultanas in rabbit droppings, haha, my new term for needle in a haystack

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