Anyone who recognizes this image knows my pain.

All the cars in Jak 3 for the PS2 (remember them)? How they were mandatory for about 45 per cent of the missions and flew into thr air if it hit a dune...which were everywhere...because it was in a desert! It made the racing missions tooth-pullingly frustrating, because it was mostly up to luck as to whether my buggy tipped or not. They did look cool though.
Also, Mako for the win.

Lord Quirk:
All the cars in Jak 3 for the PS2 (remember them)? How they were mandatory for about 45 per cent of the missions and flew into thr air if it hit a dune...which were everywhere...because it was in a desert! It made the racing missions tooth-pullingly frustrating, because it was mostly up to luck as to whether my buggy tipped or not. They did look cool though.
Also, Mako for the win.

We must have been separated at birth.

Laggyteabag:

Halo's M274 ULATV (aka Mongoose)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

>Mongoose not as fast as Warthog

It has worse acceleration, but once it gains speed it's so much faster. It just can't splatter without a slope

I loved the Mako in Mass Effect. If it got stuck you could always use the rocket-boosters to fly away and, its cannon completely destroyed most of the enemies who would come at you.

OT - I hate the vehicles in Kid Icarus Uprising. Pit already controls like a vehicle by default so I think adding more vehicles just over-complicates an already overly-complicated and, poorly utilized control scheme. Not to mention the addition of vehicles in that game seemed completely unnecessary and pointless to begin with.

It's a Warthog that can only carry two people and has no gun.

The Mako was the best vehicle ever. I loved that thing. Now the Hammerhead. That thing needs to be rebuilt with all new blueprints.

I liked the Mako and the Hammerhead.

Mongoose and the HL2 vehicles are pretty terrible yes.

I'll nominate the Drakes from World of Warcraft: Wrath of the Lich King: The Oculus & Malygos. Oh the rage those fights generated on the WoW forums, oh the grief. I personally didn't think they were ~all~ that bad, but a lot of people thought they were the absolute worst.

The Slick Star in Kirby Airide... I just don't get why it was built. It cannot make turns sharper than around the end of a football field, it has so much trouble stopping, it's just so... useless!

It warms my heart to see so much Mako love in this thread. I really feared it would be the least popular. I loved that thing. I still consider Bioware's decision to scrap it altogether instead of fine-tuning it to be unforgiveable.

I also liked the Mongoose. Ok, it didn't have a gun, but it was hilarious to zip around honking during deathmatches.

I'm going for the helicopter in Flight Simulator 98. I gave it a shot, tried to take off, and two seconds later it was on its head.

The Helicopter from Earth Defence Force. All of the vehicles in that game had handling problems but the chopper was the worst.

Racecarlock:
The tuk-tuk in just cause 2. The thing barely has enough horsepower to go up a 27 degree hill, and it's really slow. Unfortunately, it's also one of the most common vehicles. Fortunately, I have the grappling hook and parachute.

This, although I did gain some respect for it earlier when I used one to avoid a helicopter which was spraying bullets and rockets at me. Then it flipped off a bridge and plummeted into the ocean and it lost my respect again.

I think I have to nominate a vehicle from a rather new game, Wargames: European Escalation.

It's an "upgrade" to an anti-air gun jeep, which is ok, but really nothing special in itself, for the price it costs.

Its name? The Strop 1

Let's go through it's failures!
-It can only go, in optimal conditions 200km on a single tank of gas. It may sound like a lot, but you have to divide it by 5 to get the actual performance. It is in fact the vehicle with the least autonomy in the game, all that with a rather large fuel tank, 500L, which is enormous for such a small and cheap vehicle.
It's not even very fast.

-Its armed with an inaccurate anti-air 30mm auto-cannon. It doesn't have enough range to hit helicopters using missiles or rockets. Even if it manages to get in range, it fires too slowly, and takes too long to start hitting the target before it either leaves, or destroy the strop 1.

-Its price is appalling: 40. With that kind of money, you can buy a much more efficient missile launching, faster vehicle with twice the range.

-Its armor? 1 in the front of the vehicle, 0 everywhere else. Infantry can hurt it by using only rifles.

-Its health pool? Barely more than an armed (armed, not armored) truck, for two and a half the price.

The worse part of this vehicle? Its successor is truly amazing. For 25% more money, you can get much more speed, 3 times more autonomy, an accurate missile launcher, a more accurate main gun, more hp.

If you see one of these vehicles on the battlefield, you know your opponent so so desperate/incompetent, you can win just by having a single infantryman walk up to his units and kill them using only a rolled up newspaper.

The boats in Battlefield 2 & 3. Most of the time all they do is make you a bigger target.

Blackhawks in BF2. Getting into the air in one instantly attracts seven billion (Actual number may vary) tv missiles to your location.

i remember the vehicles in Jak 3 where resoundingly rubbish.
But to be honest, it seems 80% of helicopters ever seen i na game get shot down, with at least 70% of those going into a tailspin before crashing/exploding/explocrashing.

Slayer_2:
The Mako was actually pretty good, I thought, it could climb up an 80 degree incline, so pretty decent for accessibility. The weapons sucked, it was slow, and it weighed about 10 kilos, but it could climb Everest.

Some of the worst vehicles of all time were in Saints Row 2, they handle like boxes that magically accelerate from 0-100 in 2 seconds, and brake in half that.

Back in the Desert Combat mod for 1942, helicopters were made of awesome. No hand holding; they was tough as balls to fly, but they were maneuverable, fast, and deadly against ground targets.

endtherapture:

I hated this PoS.

THANK YOU! I was about to post that. Stupid bouncing. And flipping. And don't even get me started on trying to go up ramps...

Cpu46:
The Mongoose is an excelent vehicle. Sure everything you said about it's attributes was right but you left out the fact that nobody can hit you if you drive it the right way. It is an awesome flag grab vehicle and can out menuver almost anything in the game. I have taken down scorpion tanks with that little vehicle (and a buddy) simply because the tank couldn't get a good hit in on me, we didn't even have a power weapon like rockets or splazer, we had assault rifles and grenades. The wraith kill count I have with it is astronomical.

O RLY SIR? (Sorry)

This is Halo right? Then I believe that the forklift would like to have a word with you... of course I guess you could say that it doesn't really count as a "Useful" vehicle that's bad per say, more like a "Joke" vehicle that's intentionally bad.

On another note I want to stretch the meaning of "vehicle" a bit my definition of vehicle is any mode of transportation that is ride-able. I would have to say that the worst "vehicle" I have ever used in any game would be the koopa shell from Super Mario 64 (again stretch). Considering the game doesn't give you a lot of opportunities to practice with it and the fact that it has very slippery controls and multiply that by the fact that it moves forward on its own PLUS crashing into ONE thing will throw you off it's pretty crazy (and again... its a stretch)

Edit:

Lugbzurg:
The Slick Star in Kirby Airide... I just don't get why it was built. It cannot make turns sharper than around the end of a football field, it has so much trouble stopping, it's just so... useless!

If you want to talk about turning don't hate on the Slick Star (It's my favorite). It can take corners nicely and get a full boost as well if you plan the turn ahead of time. You should be yelling at the Formula Star though that thing can turn 5deg. left or right in about 10 minutes (minimum). Also why would you want to STOP in a racing game?

I can see both sides to the Mako viewpoint. Personally, it was very awkward to control.

Helicopters + planes in BF3. because im bad at the game.

Look, it's a fucking fact that the ending of ME3 sucked because you couldn't make the final charge in a Mako, bouncing around like a fucking lunatic while the Reapers try to hit you.

I would've mowed that stupid Starchild with my baby.

I would probably say any horse in any game ever
assassin's creed gets a special mention as being particularly crap

Lugbzurg:
The Slick Star in Kirby Airide... I just don't get why it was built. It cannot make turns sharper than around the end of a football field, it has so much trouble stopping, it's just so... useless!

Don't knock the slick star, you just probably haven't gotten over the learning curve. Though I agree that's irrelevant because it offers no benefits another star wouldn't, thus no reason to use it at all. The bulk star is far worse though.

Racecarlock:
The tuk-tuk in just cause 2. The thing barely has enough horsepower to go up a 27 degree hill, and it's really slow. Unfortunately, it's also one of the most common vehicles. Fortunately, I have the grappling hook and parachute.

God yes. How many times have I been looking for a good fast vehicle, only to be confronted by a string of tuk-tuks slowly trundling my way.

Also, the chariot in Prince of Persia: The Two Thrones. Always crashing because a wheel nicked a wall. *sigh*

captcha: fill the tank

Diddy Kong Racing's hoovercrafts. I'll take that HL2 one anyday of the week.

I hated the Mako. I don't often say I hate things but I hated that thing. On the other hand I did like the Hammerhead.

DigitalAtlas:

Anyone who recognizes this image knows my pain.

Oh, forgot about that thing. Yeah it's up there.

I totally agree with everyone here who says the Mako. It's just so... hard to control. You can't steer it accurately, because when you turn the wheels, you have to move forward. No, it can't be like most games where turning the wheels turns the wheels and you have to apply gas, this has to turn and jerk forward.

The Peewee pocket bike from Saints Row 2. If you ever tried to turn in that thing it instantly ground to a halt. Since the physics in that game are total wank and they also obviously didn't spend any time on the bike at all since it was a pre-order exclusive the steering would lock to 90 degrees whenever you steered in either direction at any speed. Also doing wheelies and stuff often sends the bike flipping over backwards and getting stuck in the ground.

Dishonourable mention goes to this.

Soxafloppin:
The tank from Sly 2, basicaly you powered the left track with the left stick and the right track with the right stick, sounds simple but it really, really isnt.

And also everything from Jak 2 and 3.

DigitalAtlas:

Anyone who recognizes this image knows my pain.

That I do, that I do.

What was with that driving/shooting section before the final boss :|

I adore the Jak games but can't remember the driving sections at all. I faintly remember nerd raging over a race but that's it.
Were they really that bad?

Any vehicle from Just Cause 2, they all handle terribly.

Jmp_man:
This is Halo right? Then I believe that the forklift would like to have a word with you... of course I guess you could say that it doesn't really count as a "Useful" vehicle that's bad per say, more like a "Joke" vehicle that's intentionally bad.

While I agree that the Forklift is an intentionally bad vehicle, I am forever in its debt by somehow getting me through this section on "The Pillar of Autumn" on Legendary that took me about an hour to complete.
Forklifts never die Jorge, they're just missing in action... *cries*

Mako from Mass Effect and every vehicle from Half-Life 2.

But the best? The Manta from Unreal Tournament 3 on PC controls beautifully.