Enraged Nerd Herd Pummels Would-Be Thieves


Two teenagers learned a painful lesson about messing with a man’s DS during a bungled robbery of an internet gaming center, when an enraged nerd herd finally decided that enough was enough.

To the eyes of a couple of masked teenage tough-guys, the PC Gamerz gaming center in Kaneohe, Hawaii probably looked like a soft target. It was late at night, with only a handful of customers hanging around, none of whom could reasonably be expected to stand up for himself in a confrontation. The assailants came in loud and hard, attempting to intimidate their victims; they viciously sucker-punched the clerk twice, then began yelling at the customers, demanding their money. Most handed over whatever they had.

One of the robbers then made the mistake of approaching a man named Hays.

Beyond the range of the security cameras, the thief tried to take a Nintendo DS belonging to Dylan Hays. But Dylan Hays really likes his Nintendo DS. “He wasn’t having that, so he came back swinging,” said Devin Wolery, the unfortunate manager who took two nasty shots to the face. In fact, Hays seemed happy to tangle with both the attackers until Wolery jumped in to lend an assist.

The pair managed to escape the surprise ganking with the help of a third man but Wolery had tripped an alarm before Hays got his can opener out, so all three were quickly arrested. Police don’t encourage this sort of behavior, according to a KHON2 News report, but as Hays explained, every man has his breaking point, especially gamers.

“We’re gamers, we’ve been immersed in that culture where like we all want to be Superman. You know we’re missing something partial in our brain that says, ‘Yeah, this might be dangerous’,” he said. “I mean it’s Devin’s place but it’s also ours, like this is where we come to hang out.”

Whether poor Devin felt any bitterness over the fact that his customers were more willing to fight for a Nintendo DS than they were for him was unknown at press time.

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