Who do you think would win in this WWE-style match? (Please read OP first)
Spidermod, the Hero
50.6% (44)
50.6% (44)
DVS BSTrD, the Witty
17.2% (15)
17.2% (15)
V da Mighty Taco, the Crunchy
12.6% (11)
12.6% (11)
Dr. Fetus, the Unloved
19.5% (17)
19.5% (17)
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Poll: A 4-way Escapist Battle-Royale! Who Would Win?

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Wow! My ego sure needed this
*checks results*
Awwww man! CURSE YOU SPIDER MOD!

kailus13:
I dare say it would be DVD BSTRD. He has the smarts to take on all challengers!

I am curious why you picked those specific escapists.

image

tippy2k2:
It's painfully obvious what would happen...let me paint a picture for you!

The Spider-Mod starts with a swing of the ban-hammer! He crushes Dr Fetus and completely obliterates him!

Meanwhile, Mighty Taco backs away slowly in fear and accidentally tips over the jar holding DVS (he's the one with the brain in a jar avatar, right?).

Not quite, Mabel is my avatar and Aoshima is my steed!
image

Quaxar:

CrazyCapnMorgan:
Kross.

Kross wins all the things. Then makes it so it never happened. Then makes it happen again, just for the hell of it. Then he makes it happen with thundersnow, shelf clouds and a break dancing Jimothy Sterling.

So yeah, Kross.

I dare say Susan Arendt could kick his butt if need be.

All hail the Queen!

Perhaps, but not without Kross first making it so Susan became Grumpy Cat. Then putting her in a room. With a dingily cat toy. Smothered in catnip. Attached to a rapidly spinning ceiling fan.

Captcha: evil eye

Indeed, I shall watch for those, Lord Inglip.

Spidermod would simply band them all and seize victory!

..then I would back-stab Spidermod and become the victor!

Quaxar:

CrazyCapnMorgan:
Kross.

Kross wins all the things. Then makes it so it never happened. Then makes it happen again, just for the hell of it. Then he makes it happen with thundersnow, shelf clouds and a break dancing Jimothy Sterling.

So yeah, Kross.

I dare say Susan Arendt could kick his butt if need be.

All hail the Queen!

Hey, hey, hey - take it easy! Nobody can really beat Susan. She is basically a god. And working for the Escapist is just here hobby - her job is being the final boss of the Internet. Since the Internet still stands, as we all see (BTW, thanks for that Susan! The cats are appreciated), that means she is the most powerful being around. However, there just isn't any comparison. You don't just bring in Susan like that.

V da Mighty Taco:

Okay, new rules - No BanHammer of Great Justice for Spidermod. Spidermod is the Hero of the People, and as such it would be dishonorable to defend her / his title with something like a mighty hammer. If that explanation doesn't work for you, then the Hammer's in the shop for repairs. :p

Tsk, tsk, tsk! BanHammers are like Mjolnir--indestructable![1] Even so, the Spidermod wouldn't need her BanHammer to win this contest. You mortals don't know what she's really capable of (mostly because you don't hear her victims screaming when they're wrapped up in her webbing).

PsychicTaco115:

CAGE MATCH!

Natchos? Did someone just order natchos? :D

TizzytheTormentor:
..then I would back-stab Spidermod and become the victor!

*pats palm with bloody head of personal BanHammer*

Did you forget that we Mods watch each other's backs, sunshine? o_O

[1] As long as we're Mods, that is.

DVS BSTrD:
Wow! My ego sure needed this
*checks results*
Awwww man! CURSE YOU SPIDER MOD!

kailus13:
I dare say it would be DVD BSTRD. He has the smarts to take on all challengers!

I am curious why you picked those specific escapists.

image

tippy2k2:
It's painfully obvious what would happen...let me paint a picture for you!

The Spider-Mod starts with a swing of the ban-hammer! He crushes Dr Fetus and completely obliterates him!

Meanwhile, Mighty Taco backs away slowly in fear and accidentally tips over the jar holding DVS (he's the one with the brain in a jar avatar, right?).

Not quite, Mabel is my avatar and Aoshima is my steed!
image

I find it funny that Fetus is beating both of us. Nobody even likes him, and yet apparently people root for him before us. I know I already used this pic, but this fits too perfectly to not use again:

I'm surprised it took you so long to find this thread, and that Spidermod hasn't been here yet as far as we know. I'm pretty sure he / she would want to know of her / his upcoming fight! :p

TizzytheTormentor:
Spidermod would simply band them all and seize victory!

..then I would back-stab Spidermod and become the victor!

No BanHammer, remember? Spidermod needs to defend his / her title the honorable way - with webs and his / her BEAR HANDS!!! (TF2 reference, not a typo)

PsychicTaco115:
Can I take you on for the title of Taco teh Crunchy?

Because we both know this battle needs to happen

Like right now

1v1 me, pleb

I thought it was you!

DoPo:
It's sky14kmea hands down.

lacktheknack:

sky14kmea faints!

...It's kemea. ;_;

OT: I didn't even know I'd been thrown into a Battle Royale. I'm flattered! :D

Darren Carrigan:
Fetus wins after a low blow to Spidermod

Plot twist: Spiders don't have genitals.

Fappy:
Sky wins every time. She'd just break reality with her anime girl voice. It would be over before it began.

Haaai~ Watashi wa kawai desu! Yosh!

S'all I got. May the best Escapist win!

sky14kemea:

DoPo:
It's sky14kmea hands down.

lacktheknack:

sky14kmea faints!

...It's kemea. ;_;

Hey, who says I was talking about you? I totally didn't misspell your name because it's hard to remember for my puny little brain. Nope.

<.<

>.>

Erm, yeah, I meant that other sky14kmea but seeing as they aren't actually present on this website, I'd consider changing my vote for you. Maybe.

DoPo:

sky14kemea:

DoPo:
It's sky14kmea hands down.

lacktheknack:

sky14kmea faints!

...It's kemea. ;_;

Hey, who says I was talking about you? I totally didn't misspell your name because it's hard to remember for my puny little brain. Nope.

<.<

>.>

Erm, yeah, I meant that other sky14kmea but seeing as they aren't actually present on this website, I'd consider changing my vote for you. Maybe.

Nah, don't worry about it. It happens a lot, so I'm almost used to it.

It's not the worst misspelling I've seen. o_o

sky14kemea:

DoPo:

sky14kemea:

...It's kemea. ;_;

Hey, who says I was talking about you? I totally didn't misspell your name because it's hard to remember for my puny little brain. Nope.

<.<

>.>

Erm, yeah, I meant that other sky14kmea but seeing as they aren't actually present on this website, I'd consider changing my vote for you. Maybe.

Nah, don't worry about it. It happens a lot, so I'm almost used to it.

It's not the worst misspelling I've seen. o_o

Off topic I know, but I have to ask: Are you a lady or a (not-so)gentleman? I'm too lazy to always refer to you with both gender pronouns, plus calling a lady a sexy beast might be a little inappropriate / harassment-y. I was originally going to call you "the Sexy", but switched to "the Hero" due to this. "The Hero" is probably more fitting anyways, but the thought did occur and I didn't want this thread to offend you or DVS.

V da Mighty Taco:

Off topic I know, but I have to ask: Are you a lady or a (not-so)gentleman? I'm too lazy to always refer to you with both gender pronouns, plus calling a lady a sexy beast might be a little inappropriate / harassment-y. I was originally going to call you "the Sexy", but switched to "the Hero" due to this. "The Hero" is probably more fitting anyways, but the thought did occur and I didn't want this thread to offend you or DVS.

What on earth is a (not-so)gentleman? xD

I'm female, but I don't get offended when referred to as a male. Although I think calling anyone a sexy beast without buying them breakfast is inappropriate. ;D

sky14kemea:

V da Mighty Taco:

Off topic I know, but I have to ask: Are you a lady or a (not-so)gentleman? I'm too lazy to always refer to you with both gender pronouns, plus calling a lady a sexy beast might be a little inappropriate / harassment-y. I was originally going to call you "the Sexy", but switched to "the Hero" due to this. "The Hero" is probably more fitting anyways, but the thought did occur and I didn't want this thread to offend you or DVS.

What on earth is a (not-so)gentleman? xD

I'm female, but I don't get offended when referred to as a male. Although I think calling anyone a sexy beast without buying them breakfast is inappropriate. ;D

A gentleman, but you know... not so gentle. That's they second time my puns have gone right over people's heads in this very thread. I'm sad now. T-T

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