Insult me in the most creative way possible

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As the title says, come up with the most creative ways to insult me. Or the user above. Or both. Please state which.

If you're wondering why I'm making this game specifically, SanAndreasSmoke told me to

SanAndreasSmoke:
The game is Insult Kailus in the Most Creative Way Possible

Please keep the insults fun, do not insult anyone out of spite. Keep forum games silly!

You are a pork pie bellied piece of of meat panties with all the stuffings of a fat man named Mumu.

It is clear to me that kailus's intelligence is that of a particularly stupid bacteria.

Thou art a fart monger.

kailus13:
As the title says, come up with the most creative ways to insult me. Or the user above. Or both. Please state which.

If you're wondering why I'm making this game specifically, SanAndreasSmoke told me to

SanAndreasSmoke:
The game is Insult Kailus in the Most Creative Way Possible

Please keep the insults fun, do not insult anyone out of spite. Keep forum games silly!

Haha I am such a positive influence!

OT: Kailus's mother was a hampster and his father smelt of elderberries!

You are a foul breathed, water salted, ostrich loving, pile of llama vomit.

You are so stupid that you scored slightly below average on your last math test!

kailus is so fat that I believe his mother was a whale.

You're so stupid you though a tsunami was a type of sushi

You smell like a Klingon, have the morals of a Ferengi, you are cold as Vulcan and treacherous as a Romulan

Substitute chemistry teacher.

It is believed that kailus is so smelly he disturbs skunks.

If I had a dollar for every brain you don't have, I'd have one dollar.

Kailus13 has the most adorable avatar on this site.

It speaks volumes about his character.

Your mother is so corpulent, that when she adorns a yellow raincoat random pedestrians will periodically mistake her for a public transportation vehicle.

It is difficult to tell if kailus has hair, or if he just likes wearing dead animals as a hat.

Yer maw's a DJ in a nu-metal band.

kailus is so stupid he can't even tell i'm insulting him.

Kailus wants so hard to be liked and popular, he starts threads and then talks to himself in them.

kailus is so stuck up, he talks about himself in third person.

Kailus is so full of it that if you gave him a wafer thin wafer he would burst.

Kailus is so useless, he couldn't even keep this thread going for more than 2 days.

He also smells of elder berries and old people.

EDIT: Thread over.

You are a sad excuse for a man who can't even keep his own thread afloat.

kailus is so stupid, he forgot this thread even existed.

You're a dub-stepping wubphile.

"I'm a what?" "You're an idiot, kailus" "oh"

Kailus, past instances in which I expressed to like you, were fraudulent!

I bet you're such a dunce that you won't even pick up on the reference

You, sir, are a shit weaseled turd muffin.

Fijiman you fight like a farmer!

I find your literature to be lazily constructed and devoid of whimsy.

Dr.Susse smells like a perfume shop that's next to a candle shop.

If a thought came into your head it would die of loneliness!

I engaged in intercourse with your spouse or significant other.

Captcha = i'm sorry

I'm not.

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