Zero Punctuation: Nier

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Interesting that Ben likes to sometimes do a jRPG once in a while. I have no idea what Nier is still either.

FYI, that boss wasn't just ripped from Zelda. Go all the way back to Kirby Superstar for the SNES....one of the 8-in-1 games in it was called "The Great Cave Offensive" which also had a very similar boss.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o0C03vXGyMY

They recently updated the graphics and released it for the DS.

If he hadn't mentioned it on Twitter, the review earlier this week had me thinking we'd be seeing Nier in ZP this week. It's standard ZP fare, i.e. very good and funny, especially the name Yahtzee assigns to Nier when he gets the opportunity.

What is this 'Illbleed' of which he speaks?

Yay puns. I have a feeling by the time i get and finish this game, all my near's will be spelled nier. Its like tf2 made me spell sandwich as sandvich for months. Made my English teacher mad.

Jark212:
Well if I'm forced at gunpoint to buy a Square Enix game, Nier would be the game I'd buy...

What about Just Cause 2. They had as much to do with that than they did Nier (Nier was deved by Cavia).

EDIT: Maybe you could get MW2 since Square published that in Japan.

I enjoyed this, and hope very much FUN SPACE GAME: THE GAME incorporates a small Zork-eque quest. There's not enough wit and good writing in games, and desperately arguing with a computer to try and get it to work (perhaps as a parody of HAL9000?) is something I think would be well received.

Plus the idea of a bunch of txtspking kidz trying to communic8 wiv a computer thats OMG liek absolute Grammar Nazi sounds like sadistic fun (my favourite kind!).

Hehe John Major. Take that America! You have no idea what that joke was about and proabaly never will.

I hadn't heard of near either. Don't think that I'd like it but the review was fun, especially the last part.

L1250:
The actually masculine character design for the main character that seems odd for a Square game was apparently designed for the sole purpose of the non-Japan release.

The original is actually the one we got (Nier: Gestalt on the Japanese 360). The one you displayed is from Nier: Replicant (a Japan only PS3 release) which was created to suit Japanese tastes.

mehhh
normally some JRRPGs have some ability to cause a slight twinge that admittedly make me wanna check them out (but I rarely actually do because I simply don't have time to commit to RPG games of any kind), but this is one that really doesn't draw me to it at all

I mean, not saying it's bad or anything I don't have an opinion except I'm just not interested
even games like Metro #### or w/e (ya I know it's not an RPG just saying) had some intrigue cuz of its atmosphere

oh well, I heard the new Dead to Rights game was miserably bad sooo bleh
but hey, lotsa games coming out this month...or heck this week lol, can't wait to see how those turn out

Azhrarn-101:

Jark212:
Well if I'm forced at gunpoint to buy a Square Enix game, Nier would be the game I'd buy...

Considering that Just Cause 2 and Supreme Commander 2 are both Square Enix games (in the sense that it's the publisher of both), then you do have better choices available. Unless you meant a S.E. J-RPG obviously. ^_^

Square only published Nier. It was developed by Cavia.
Square also published Modern Warfare 2 in Japan, so does that mean that MW2 is a Square Enix game?

Stilton:

L1250:
The actually masculine character design for the main character that seems odd for a Square game was apparently designed for the sole purpose of the non-Japan release.

See this, this right here, is incorrect information. The "grizzled old man" is the original character design, whereas the effeminate prettyboy was created later on, in order to appease the japanese audience.

In other news: A ZP about Nier without as much as a single tiny reference to the brilliance that is Grimoire Weiss? Who's this guy and what has he done to Yahtzee?

s69-5:

L1250:
The actually masculine character design for the main character that seems odd for a Square game was apparently designed for the sole purpose of the non-Japan release.

The original is actually the one we got (Nier: Gestalt on the Japanese 360). The one you displayed is from Nier: Replicant (a Japan only PS3 release) which was created to suit Japanese tastes.

I see. My apologies for the mix-up. It's still a rather odd design decision, regardless.

Hm. I didn't expect him to review this.

Still, I was planning to buy it anyway and the fact that Yahtzee even remotely liked it is good enough to guarantee my purchase.

A NEARRR DEATH EXPERIENCE, BOOSH!

Win. :]

This was NIERLY the worst zero punctuation ever. Raspy voice, redundant comments...

I'm surprised Ben never heard of Nier.

On the other hand though, his review quality IMO is going up again, compared to some rather recent older times, if that makes any sense...

Bayushi_Kouya:
Anyone else get a nonworking video screen?

Its adblock dude

I hadn't heard of it either, but my thoughts of "wonder what it is and if it's any good" died the instant you said "Square Enix".

And from the sounds of things, I should just keep playing 3D Dot Game Heroes, a Zelda ripoff/homage/whatever you wish to call it that's actually good.

No one you knew had heard of this game? Dont you know any gamers then?

Seemed pretty decent to me. Well done Yahtzee. :)

Nier may have potential. But I fear that being dragged out of the action after every level just to water a melon crop will just get on my tits. Or get me hopelessly addicted to Farmville again D:

Having said that, I'm impressed that theres enough character spaces to rename "Nier" as "Twattycakes" :D

Kage Me:
...Yeah, I really don't think Majora's Mask would be the best example of a Zelda-in-a-different-dress game.

I was just about to point that out.

Note to Yahtzee: When you deliver your obligatory "All Zelda Games Are Alike" snark, Majora's Mask is the LAST game you want to cite as an example.

I didn't think yathzee would review this game. Perhaps this is his real attempt to beat down his track record of just hating jrpgs cause this review sounded pretty fair. Hmm maybe when the game breaks down to 20 bucks I'll probably buy it.

Haha... Boosh!

That was the highlight of the episode.

aaah yes marketing gone wrong again! now please marketeers who make up names: always google your stuff!
what is a nier anyways...except for a kidney

Is one also slipped under my radar.

But from sounds of it for good reason.

Might rent it, but otherwise great review!

Man, I sure hope he never starts to review a Harvest Moon game . =D

he cussed a lot in this vid.....laughed me head off abt it

Actually, funnily enough, in Nier Replicant (aka: The primary Japanese version), Nier is a Teenaged boy trying ot save his little sister.

That's the only change. They just swapped out Adult-Father Nier for teenaged-brother Nier.

Oy.

BlueInkAlchemist:
If he hadn't mentioned it on Twitter, the review earlier this week had me thinking we'd be seeing Nier in ZP this week. It's standard ZP fare, i.e. very good and funny, especially the name Yahtzee assigns to Nier when he gets the opportunity.

What is this 'Illbleed' of which he speaks?

cursedseishi:
Yeah, I'm surprised he never mentioned Grimoire Weiss, the two seem like they'd get along great.
That pun at the end though? Hah! So horrible that it was awesome, and trust me you aren't the only one who suffered from a Nier-Death experience.

And, for the life of me I can not find anything about that "Illbleed" or "Lilbleed" or whatever game... I'm quite curious to see what a chick with just 3 strips of tape looks like.

http://lparchive.org/LetsPlay/illbleed/

SirMax:
Woah what Yahtzee's seen the true ending of Illbleed? Maybe he watched that LP...

Probably. Considering what I just posted, you can tell that I did, too.
And I regret it.
Immensely.
To quote myself:

Erana:

One of the worst [twist endings] was Illbleed... I watched an LP of that game, and it was OK at first, then got really weird. The New game plus is Just... Oh, GOD. GOD, Get it out of my head!
Why...‽‽‽
No....
Brain bleach! Brain bleach!

Seriously, Yahtzee. I posted that just yesterday. Yesterday. About a game that almost no one has heard of, and before this video has only been mentioned twice in the entire Escapist. Are you trying to screw around with my head‽

At least you can tell the main hero IS a man...

Regardless I would only pick this one up if I played a demo first and it was cheap. Why? Well mostly because of the former statement. It has the weird art style but no cliche she-boys clogging up the story.

Hah, I heard about a game before Yahtzee!

Funny thing is, I mentioned the looping soundtrack yesterday in another thread about Nier. It was the only thing that really annoyed me in the game.

All Hails to our Pungeon-Master Y.C. for another great review of another not that great product of nogramming

"Zelda is only one game with about 50 different dresses."

Really, I would say it's 2 games with about 25 different dresses each, 1 game with two terrible CD-i dresses, and Zelda 2.

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