Critical Miss: #24

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ItsAPaul:
Wow, really? That's the worst attitude towards mtg I've ever seen. I can't play kitchen table types because they're so bad at the game... don't know resource management, think that "living the dream" decks actually win, etc. I've got no problem playing casual formats like EDH but it'd still be no fun if your opponents don't get that 2 for 1s are good and all that.

Also, tournament decks aren't expensive. There are always the cheap one that's like 150-200 to make, and the most expensive you can go (if it's even still viable) is 700 for a deck that goes out of its way to play the most expensive cards. That's for Type 2 where you generally need new stuff every set; older decks are more expensive assuming you need dual lands but they never change.

EDIT - omg people are talking about Sliver Queen and Elvish Piper like they're viable in this thread... *facepalm*

Nice man. The smug sneering at the end there really helped make your point about how fun tournament games are.

ItsAPaul:
Wow, really? That's the worst attitude towards mtg I've ever seen. I can't play kitchen table types because they're so bad at the game... don't know resource management, think that "living the dream" decks actually win, etc. I've got no problem playing casual formats like EDH but it'd still be no fun if your opponents don't get that 2 for 1s are good and all that.

Also, tournament decks aren't expensive. There are always the cheap one that's like 150-200 to make, and the most expensive you can go (if it's even still viable) is 700 for a deck that goes out of its way to play the most expensive cards. That's for Type 2 where you generally need new stuff every set; older decks are more expensive assuming you need dual lands but they never change.

EDIT - omg people are talking about Sliver Queen and Elvish Piper like they're viable in this thread... *facepalm*

This is casual play talk.
Nor Tourney.
It is well known they can't be used.

Am I the only one who thinks she looks pretty nice in that outfit..? O.o

Good comic! I haven't played since the Melbourne GP last year, so I haven't seen much of the Zendikar sets.
I'm a big fan of discard-decks. One of my favorites was something I threw together from the Alara sets, consisting solely of 1/1 meatshields, and then mind funerals and Nemesis of Reasons. Endless hours of fun.

That's what I love about MTG, when a player suddenly does a 180 on you and wipes you out, or those fun theme decks you use against friends.

And that's why I don't like Duels of the Planeswalkers, so many limitations.

LOL i know exactly what you mean. my old deck from the timespiral set deffinatly had this effect. my current vampire deck has that "oh crud, he just summoned my doom" kinda feel to it. a Vampire nighthawk is annoying. but when four vampire nocturnus come into play one right after the other, it becomes one of the most feared cards i own. XD that or the treefolk deck my friend runs with.

Ahaha, I totally know that. I've been playing M:TG for about 9 years now, good to see a comic about it. (:

Otaku13:
LOL i know exactly what you mean. my old deck from the timespiral set deffinatly had this effect. my current vampire deck has that "oh crud, he just summoned my doom" kinda feel to it. a Vampire nighthawk is annoying. but when four vampire nocturnus come into play one right after the other, it becomes one of the most feared cards i own. XD that or the treefolk deck my friend runs with.

Pah. Vampire nighthawk. It is a poor man's Chimney Imp .

Jhereg42:
I had this card called the Sliver Queen that basically mades tons of little 1/1 cannonfodder. Everybody was like "oooh, scary" until I played an Overrun.

There is no greater sense of satisfaction than killing all three opponents in a 4 way duel in one turn thanks to a horde of 1/1 Slivers.

Dear lord. We had a guy with a sliver deck at school... I'm so glad he graduated.
That deck screwed people's stuff up on a daily basis for a while.

I just got back from a draft so that was glorious. Friend of mine has what he calls his Castelvania deck every card in it is something you would see in a Castelvania game. The sad part is it wins a lot.

I shed a tear of joy for my Magic the Gathering days. Back when Lightning Bolts were 3 damage for 1 red mana, birds of paradise were highly coveted, and my blue/black counterspell deck was a thing of beauty.

I imagined the seagull was a bird of paradise with fire-breathing enchanted on it. :D

Karlaxx:

Jhereg42:
I had this card called the Sliver Queen that basically mades tons of little 1/1 cannonfodder. Everybody was like "oooh, scary" until I played an Overrun.

There is no greater sense of satisfaction than killing all three opponents in a 4 way duel in one turn thanks to a horde of 1/1 Slivers.

Dear lord. We had a guy with a sliver deck at school... I'm so glad he graduated.
That deck screwed people's stuff up on a daily basis for a while.

Sounds like my sliver deck. I intentionally went out of my way to insure it was the baddest deck I had in my arsenal; Coat of Arms comes to mind. :)

Firia:
I shed a tear of joy for my Magic the Gathering days. Back when Lightning Bolts were 3 damage for 1 red mana, birds of paradise were highly coveted, and my blue/black counterspell deck was a thing of beauty.

Bolts have been back for over a year, rejoice!

NihilCredo:

Firia:
I shed a tear of joy for my Magic the Gathering days. Back when Lightning Bolts were 3 damage for 1 red mana, birds of paradise were highly coveted, and my blue/black counterspell deck was a thing of beauty.

Bolts have been back for over a year, rejoice!

For reals? I thought they were phased out due to being overpowered. I've always thought I was sitting on a trove of classical gold mines. Oh well. :)

Firia:

NihilCredo:

Firia:
I shed a tear of joy for my Magic the Gathering days. Back when Lightning Bolts were 3 damage for 1 red mana, birds of paradise were highly coveted, and my blue/black counterspell deck was a thing of beauty.

Bolts have been back for over a year, rejoice!

For reals? I thought they were phased out due to being overpowered. I've always thought I was sitting on a trove of classical gold mines. Oh well. :)

They're absolutely everywhere now. Birds of paradise not so much but they've been replaced with the similar but better/worse depending on your colour, Llanowar Elves who are so numerous they come with boxes of cereal. In my opinion it's a better card when combined with the absolute mana humping horseshit that is elvish archdruid.

Firia:
I shed a tear of joy for my Magic the Gathering days. Back when Lightning Bolts were 3 damage for 1 red mana, birds of paradise were highly coveted, and my blue/black counterspell deck was a thing of beauty.

I imagined the seagull was a bird of paradise with fire-breathing enchanted on it. :D

You know, they reprinted Lightning Bolt and Birds of Paradise in the 2011 core set. Both of them can still kick ass - Lightning Bolt especially so when you have a pair of these in play.

21/21 pridemate?! that would mean that you would have had to have gained life for like 20 turns how long did that freakin game last? 0_o

AugustFall:
Last night on MTGO I was faced with a loop, it was aweful. I could get him down to 8 life in both games but then through scrying and other such cards he has all that he needs and opens up an infinite loop which negates my turn and then uses infinite direct damages.
I too love playing with my friends with as you say ridiculous theme decks (we can't make a deck without a theme) but I like the challenge of Tournament play.

Great comic as usual, reminds me of when my friend, using his saporling deck, equipped this ridiculous black legendary scythe and took on my then 21/21 Ajani's Pridemate. I love literal translations of what's happening in magic, it's crazy.

21/21 pridemate?! that would mean that you would have had to have gained life for like 20 turns how long did that freakin game last? 0_o

Jhereg42:
I had this card called the Sliver Queen that basically mades tons of little 1/1 cannonfodder. Everybody was like "oooh, scary" until I played an Overrun.

There is no greater sense of satisfaction than killing all three opponents in a 4 way duel in one turn thanks to a horde of 1/1 Slivers.

I have a sliver deck as well and everyone fears my little 1/1 army. I also have an overrun and a Garruk I can substitute in if I would so please to do so. Lets just say that by a few turns all my 1/1 slivers ended up becoming 3/3-6/7 with vigilance, haste, trample, reach, flanking, double strike, (tap) regenerate target sliver, and I cast overrun. I beat everyone else in one turn as well.

It's always fun to play bullshit cards when you're playing casually. I have a lot of them that i don't put into decks simply because i rather like my friends and don't want to make MTG into the next monopoly. But its also fun to wipe the floor with them.

Godavari:
Lightning Bolt especially so when you have a pair of these in play.

I also have a fire servant, but my red deck also has one of these, and, one, of , these
Lets just say that it all of that and lightning bolts, lava axes, and a dragons claw makes for a fun win.

ItsAPaul:
Wow, really? That's the worst attitude towards mtg I've ever seen. I can't play kitchen table types because they're so bad at the game... don't know resource management, think that "living the dream" decks actually win, etc. I've got no problem playing casual formats like EDH but it'd still be no fun if your opponents don't get that 2 for 1s are good and all that.

Also, tournament decks aren't expensive. There are always the cheap one that's like 150-200 to make, and the most expensive you can go (if it's even still viable) is 700 for a deck that goes out of its way to play the most expensive cards. That's for Type 2 where you generally need new stuff every set; older decks are more expensive assuming you need dual lands but they never change.

EDIT - omg people are talking about Sliver Queen and Elvish Piper like they're viable in this thread... *facepalm*

oh my GOD I'm so goddamn ANGRY about how other people I don't know play CARDGAMES AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH

Magic is a game, not a job

Grey Carter:
I've often argued that the kitchen table is the natural habitat of Magic: the Gathering games. Tournament play is all right I guess if you've got lots of money and no friends (or if you're completely hyper competitive) but, like most things when there's money to be won, it's ruined by the single-minded determination to win, win at any cost. Combo decks and ludicrously cheap loops rule the day (though many players would decry me as a 'scrub' for using the word cheap), whatever, tournament play simply isn't for me.

So, you refuse to learn to play the game the way it's played competitively, therefore anyone who goes to tournaments is scum? Stay at the kitchen table, thanks. Merely using the word "cheap" does not make you a scrub. Complaining about and banning strategies instead of finding ways to counteract them does. Also, it's virtually impossible to play tournament Magic without friends. Never know who might have the card you need to borrow.

It's too bad the commentary ruined the comic, which I thought was pretty funny. I have a bunch of Tempest Owls I've written "Not Welkin Tern" onto, because I kept picking them by mistake thinking they were Terns in ZZW draft.

MaxFan:

Grey Carter:
I've often argued that the kitchen table is the natural habitat of Magic: the Gathering games. Tournament play is all right I guess if you've got lots of money and no friends (or if you're completely hyper competitive) but, like most things when there's money to be won, it's ruined by the single-minded determination to win, win at any cost. Combo decks and ludicrously cheap loops rule the day (though many players would decry me as a 'scrub' for using the word cheap), whatever, tournament play simply isn't for me.

So, you refuse to learn to play the game the way it's played competitively, therefore anyone who goes to tournaments is scum?

Yes, Yes! That's exactly what I was saying! You can tell from the part where I said "people who go to tournaments are scum" instead of "tournament play simply isn't for me." Also, how could I comment on higher level play if I'd never played a higher level game. I simply prefer the atmosphere of a kitchen table match.

Seriously, all this paranoid anger really isn't helping to prove you tourney player's points.

And linking to Sirlin, Bible of the docuhebag? Probably not doing you any favours either.

In short. I like X, you like Y. I post in jest, you are super serious.

I used to play MTG tournament play, spent a lot of money on cards, won some local tournaments, went to some of the big pre-release tournaments.

Then I realized that I was paying good money to sit in a room all day, where I was guaranteed to meet some smug douchebag who was constantly pulling every possible rule-hack or cheat they thought they could get away with.

They didn't care to much about actually playing the game, they just wanted to be declared the winner via any means they could manage.

Stalling when they were ahead on life if the game was running long, conveniently "forgetting" things that weren't in their favor and acting offended if you called them on it, yet somehow watching you like a hawk and being completely inflexible if they "catch" you in some minor tournament rule infraction. Good sportmanship or actually enjoying the game is an alien concept to them. Various other tactics that had nothing to do with their deck or actually playing the game well.

Most players are not like that of course. But if you go to one of the money tournaments, you will meet at least one, and probably several if you progress far enough. It left a very bad taste in my mouth.

Grey Carter:

Slycne:

Grey Carter:

On the face of it, there's nothing special about the Welkin Tern, it's a 2/1 flyer for 2 mana. A decent quick drop and good for pecking away at an opponent but it's not going to set the earth on fire (that's a little joke, it does) when compared to some , of , the , cards in my deck.

Eldrazi decks are so much fun, I almost feel bad sometimes, almost. Hand of Emrakul is still one of my favorites for how quickly you can have a 7/7 Annihilator 1 on the board.

I do feel kind of bad because they prove those people who've been whining about power creep for the past few years like nine different flavours of right.

Eh, there are still Legacy block decks that are based on cards before the Eighth Edition which absolutely demolish. I'm thinking Goblins and the like - making me wish that I had the money to justify a good Goblin build. And don't even start on Vintage decks.

As for the card that everybody fears in my deck, it's the Troll Ascetic - a 3/2 for 1GG which can't be the target of spells or abilities controlled by opponents, and which has regeneration for 1G. It's unassuming at first, but once I start getting Blanchwood Armors on it, it starts to steamroll over the field. Closer to the example in the comic is Xantid Swarm, a 0/1 flyer for G - one of the rare green flyers, and much more threatening when it's backed up by a Blanchwood Armor.

I can recall the last time I tried to play Magic. Well not really it was 2004 and I've had a lot of alcohol since then. But I made some Green deck and thought it was okay then I played against my friend's red deck (one out of eight decks). Maybe it was brown, it was some colour that was the polar opposite of green. The moral is he kicked my ass before I had 2 monsters out and as with first time I played Guitar Hero (1) I said "F--- this game!" And never played again, Magic that is not Guitar Hero. You have to know how play guitar hero/rock band if you have nerdy friends because pretending to play is easier than really playing!

It's not that I don't like Magic, I just don't like playing a game where you can't ever beat the friend that got you started on it but I guess it's slightly more fair than DnD.

I really enjoy your series. Have seen all of them so far.

It's nothing 'special' in terms of style or whatever (barring the art style, which is a little quirky, I'm talking setting, general theme of jokes etc.), but it's fantastically executed.

Is Grey's Corner new? I don't remember seeing it before. It kind of reminds me of the penny-arcade front-page 'news' rambles, which might be a bad thing, just thinking long-term. But this one was definitely relatable. I remember using a death deck almost completely full of rats, and a light deck that had a wall of light (0/5, I think it forced creatures to attack it), Something's Blessing (+3/+3, flying), and something that made it invincible - hey, it was a long time ago! - but yeah, they were terrible decks that sometimes did awesome things. Loads of fun. Once I started getting good decks together, I quickly grew bored with the limited permutations possible at mid level play - dread to think what high level was like. I gave away several shoeboxes of the things, and sold a couple more for some charity event.

It was fun while it lasted, tho.

ItsAPaul:

Also, tournament decks aren't expensive. There are always the cheap one that's like 150-200 to make, and the most expensive you can go (if it's even still viable) is 700 for a deck that goes out of its way to play the most expensive cards. That's for Type 2 where you generally need new stuff every set; older decks are more expensive assuming you need dual lands but they never change.

Way to go defending the elitist and expensive tournament decks. 150-200? For a deck that might be relevant for a month, maybe two? Christ I bought both my ally decks for under 30 and I've had fun with them since zendikar, and the red/white one actually does not bad against some archtypes. Its people like you that make me understand why my missus won't play at prereleases. Magic pros are the enemies of fun sometimes.

If anyone wants a laugh look up the price for a playset of baneslayer angel or jace, the mind sculptor on ebay.

Grey Carter:

Slycne:

Grey Carter:

I do feel kind of bad because they prove those people who've been whining about power creep for the past few years like nine different flavours of right.

Some of them just stray into complete bullshit territory. Especially when combined with everyone's favourite fatty dropper, Elvish Piper.

True, though I think people often dismiss or forget about some of the crazy stuff in older editions. There are some very powerful cards like Balance "I'm resetting the game for 2 mana." Though almost every deck I construct now includes Enchantment destruction to deal with 2011 core set Leylines, those are annoying as all hell.

Oh God yes. Leyline of sanctity may as well read "Players with red or black decks may not win the game."

I beg to differ. These are all in my Red/Black deck.

Karousawai:

ItsAPaul:

Also, tournament decks aren't expensive. There are always the cheap one that's like 150-200 to make, and the most expensive you can go (if it's even still viable) is 700 for a deck that goes out of its way to play the most expensive cards. That's for Type 2 where you generally need new stuff every set; older decks are more expensive assuming you need dual lands but they never change.

Way to go defending the elitist and expensive tournament decks. 150-200? For a deck that might be relevant for a month, maybe two? Christ I bought both my ally decks for under 30 and I've had fun with them since zendikar, and the red/white one actually does not bad against some archtypes. Its people like you that make me understand why my missus won't play at prereleases. Magic pros are the enemies of fun sometimes.

If anyone wants a laugh look up the price for a playset of baneslayer angel or jace, the mind sculptor on ebay.

As I recall, people on the various MTG forums call him 'Jace the Money Scalper.'

His flavour text reads "Fuck your kids, you can't afford college."

Godavari:

Firia:
I shed a tear of joy for my Magic the Gathering days. Back when Lightning Bolts were 3 damage for 1 red mana, birds of paradise were highly coveted, and my blue/black counterspell deck was a thing of beauty.

I imagined the seagull was a bird of paradise with fire-breathing enchanted on it. :D

You know, they reprinted Lightning Bolt and Birds of Paradise in the 2011 core set. Both of them can still kick ass - Lightning Bolt especially so when you have a pair of these in play.

Yeah, someone quoted me to tell me that Lightning Bolts are back. :) I had no idea! I thought they were so over powered (really, 3 damage for one red as an instant? AWESOME) that they were phased out. I wouldn't be surprised if they were rare (I figure uncommon, at least) now.

That is a mighty fine beast there. I'm not sure I'd have a place for it in any of my old decks. My red decks were fast and furious. I had a goblin deck wherein nothing cost more than 2 mana to play, and could drop a player in 4 to 5 turns. If I wasn't playing a goblin every turn, I was doing it wrong. :) Lightning bolts were strictly a support spell for me. I'd use them to kill creatures that stood in my path, or that dared to attack me. The only time I'd lob one at a player was as a finishing move. Not even then, if they were playing blue. ;)

(The reason why that critter wouldn't have a place in many of my decks would due to the high cost of it. While its special ability is undeniably badass, it would take at least 5 turns to put out, and fall to the first lightning bolt on the field. To maintain its longevity, I'd need more equally badass critters, and/or buffing enchantments. That would bump it to a 6th turn creature, at least. But which time I'm in my endgame. Still, miiiiighty fine ability, that. :) )

Grey Carter:

Firia:

NihilCredo:

Firia:
I shed a tear of joy for my Magic the Gathering days. Back when Lightning Bolts were 3 damage for 1 red mana, birds of paradise were highly coveted, and my blue/black counterspell deck was a thing of beauty.

Bolts have been back for over a year, rejoice!

For reals? I thought they were phased out due to being overpowered. I've always thought I was sitting on a trove of classical gold mines. Oh well. :)

They're absolutely everywhere now. Birds of paradise not so much but they've been replaced with the similar but better/worse depending on your colour, Llanowar Elves who are so numerous they come with boxes of cereal. In my opinion it's a better card when combined with the absolute mana humping horseshit that is elvish archdruid.

Birds of Paradise were great depending on how they were used. One green for a 0/1 flying creature that when tapped produces one of ANY color?! They could have asked us to pay one green and one colorless, and it'd still be reasonable. As it is, it's badASS! Yeah, getting one in the late game is just fodder for the masses. But right at the go, it can accelerate a deck from fast to hyperdrive. With the right enchantments, they can even be turned into effective combatants-- though they were never intended to be that way on my decks. Merely bonuses.

Round one; Play bird of paradise.
Round two; Play firebreathing.
Round three; Attack (assuming they have no aerial defenses).

If the player used a lightning bolt to bring your seagull Bird of Paradise down, then you're not really out anything big, but they're down one Bolt. It's still win win. ;) And even if they have a flyer, let that thing block, and let your bird tear it up. Creature down, you still win. If it doesn't block, you're eatting life points, and that much closer to winning. BETTER win! :D

BAH! Pardon the double post. :( Sorry bout that.

Grey Carter:
some , of , the , cards

Have fun against all of my Eldrazi cards. And thats not even counting my drones and spawn swarms. Which are devastating with cards like Rapacious One and Broodwarden, supported by a Raid Bombardment or two.

Firia:

Godavari:

Firia:
I shed a tear of joy for my Magic the Gathering days. Back when Lightning Bolts were 3 damage for 1 red mana, birds of paradise were highly coveted, and my blue/black counterspell deck was a thing of beauty.

I imagined the seagull was a bird of paradise with fire-breathing enchanted on it. :D

You know, they reprinted Lightning Bolt and Birds of Paradise in the 2011 core set. Both of them can still kick ass - Lightning Bolt especially so when you have a pair of these in play.

Yeah, someone quoted me to tell me that Lightning Bolts are back. :) I had no idea! I thought they were so over powered (really, 3 damage for one red as an instant? AWESOME) that they were phased out. I wouldn't be surprised if they were rare (I figure uncommon, at least) now.

That is a mighty fine beast there. I'm not sure I'd have a place for it in any of my old decks. My red decks were fast and furious. I had a goblin deck wherein nothing cost more than 2 mana to play, and could drop a player in 4 to 5 turns. If I wasn't playing a goblin every turn, I was doing it wrong. :) Lightning bolts were strictly a support spell for me. I'd use them to kill creatures that stood in my path, or that dared to attack me. The only time I'd lob one at a player was as a finishing move. Not even then, if they were playing blue. ;)

(The reason why that critter wouldn't have a place in many of my decks would due to the high cost of it. While its special ability is undeniably badass, it would take at least 5 turns to put out, and fall to the first lightning bolt on the field. To maintain its longevity, I'd need more equally badass critters, and/or buffing enchantments. That would bump it to a 6th turn creature, at least. But which time I'm in my endgame. Still, miiiiighty fine ability, that. :) )

Bolts are actually at common. I find it insane, but then again, it seems somewhat necessary, since white has become the answer to red with cards like Leyline of Sanctity, Goldenglow Moth, Ajani's Mantra, and Ajani's Pridemate. I went to a draft the other night where a guy got 4 copies of each of the latter three. He didn't win, but he sure kicked my ass straight to the curb. White is a serious contender in most tournaments I go to, actually. Especialy since this came out last year. I mean, damn. And people say Eldrazi was the height of the power creep.

I can understand why Fire Servant wouldn't fit. A lot of old decks worked really, really fast. I think this card is viable in a red deck these days because there is a correlation between the power creep and the mana cost of cards. I've never seen a modern red deck kill in 4 turns. Mine, as it stands, wouldn't even stand a chance of doing that. I'm not sure if a goblin deck could work out that problem. I have never constructed a "swarm" deck such as goblins, elves, or slivers, so I don't really know. : |

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