Zero Punctuation: E3 2012

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Until I noticed the related terms I couldn't remember the name of the winner of yahtzee's inaugural least excruciating game of E3 award, and I got to thinking. One thing Final Fantasy's endless mostly unrelated sequel generation has going for it is that advertising can be a great deal less expensive. A five second clip and a logo will do as much for people's understanding of a game like FFLARGENUMBER as a full game play video with critical excerpts and the name of the game repeated like from the mouth of a mad used car salesman would for a game like Watch Dogs. That's not to say it's better, just possibly less expensive. >.>

What? No mention at all about XCOM: Enemy Unknown from Yahtzee, OR the comments? For SHAME people! Where are all the strategy game enthusiasts nowadays? xD

Yathzee hates the RTS genre. He outright refused to play starcraft two.

Michael Ellis:


Michael Ellis:

Wow, that's so inaccurate it's not even funny. And what, caring about a character suddenly became a perversion overnight while I was sleeping?

Sexualized=\=perversive FYI. Look into it. Got nothing more to say


Feel free to think whatever you think. But don't act offended when someone thinks otherwise. Peace out

I'm sorry, did I miss something? When did being baffled at other people's idiocy become interchangable with being offended?

There was waaay too much time spent on "Steve" this video lol.

Is it just me, or did the new enemies in Halo 4 look like they were stolen right out of the Metroid series?

Watchdogs came across as polarizing for me.
Because of the terrible sound quality from when I saw it, I did not realize that its gimmick was "instantaneous multiplayer" (as it was announced). I thought I was watching a modern-noir/heist game play it totally-straight-faced, then after a conversation with a douchebag, some absurdly contrived gunfight broke out at an intersection.

It look like the bastard spawn of Live Free or Die Hard and Grand Theft Auto 4.
At least it's memorable.

Apart from that, I can sum up E3 in three letters.


I really can't be the only one who signed up for The Escapist's website solely for ZP. I don't know what other features this site has, nor do I care, I'm more interested in the misanthropic British man's rant than "Space Janitors".

Anyways, I adopted Yahtzee's rule of hype, and I must say videogames are much easier to handle once I assume they are rubbish.

Funniest part about this video: the voice actress for Lara Croft is actually British (born and schooled in Ascot, Berkshire). How badly do you have to work to mess up your own accent?

Although, I suppose if I tried to pull off, say, a Brooklyn accent, people would criticize me for botching an American accent, and I don't really know what her original accent sounded like in relation to the accent she tried to pull off as Lara Croft, but still.

man, id love to hire yathzee for child care services.

Third time's the charm; Yahtzee actually figured out which end of a harp is which. Now I can finally sleep at night, thank you.

Well at least there's at least one sane person that can see past all of the crap the industry is trying to ram down our throats from E3. Despite the fact there was a whole load of 'good' hype given by even just those in my community over the Wii U and a huge clusterfuck over Halo 4, I can't help but seem to think that somehow it all just went cocks up somewhere during the planning for the presentation or to be more blunt, during the planning of the bloody game.

To elaborate, it just seems like they're trying so hard to show us hyped up content that will either:
A) Only occur in the first 15 minutes of gameplay; Or
B) NOT EVEN OCCUR AT ALL (Thank you screwy, 'not in-game footage' with your flashy effects and fake graphics)

Surely if they spent more time actually planning a game through instead of saying 'Lets go whip that franchise until it coughs up something decent' we would end up with a lot more games that people with half a brain would actually want to play. Point in reference, Watch Dogs, at least there was a tiny glimmer of hope in the otherwise bottomless cauldron of despair called E3.

Father Time:

lol guess I've learned from Yahtzee not to fall for the E3 hype machine
I def waited until the gameplay demos before feeling excited for anything, and some those I thought (Halo 4 and AC 3 looked good)
but especially the Watchdogs demo, which was one I randomly watched because I was bored and WOW... o.O shiny

my friend got all excited by the Wii-U presentations and I tried to see why but turns out my friend is just kinda braindead and not my friend anymore :[

You stopped being friends over taste in video games?

actually it's more to do with that he's just really naive

I am a kind enough friend in that I try to encourage him to study more and not spend money he doesn't have lol

You know the problem with comparing Nintendo to George Lucas is he used Jar Jar Binks who nobody likes, not even the people that LIKE the prequels, instead of whiny loser Anakin and the fucking Space Australian Clone Troopers which get more face time than the cool characters that aren't played by completely wooden actors like Obi Wan.

Otherwise its just his typical Anti-Nintendo hard on.

upon reviewing this was quite an energetic video xD more encouraging than bashing in some ways lol

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