Zero Punctuation: Alone in the Dark

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Spot on again. I must say I like the intro/outtro too. Not as funny as the "obvious" song choices, but I do like the music.

Keep up the hilarity :)

Oh, and whoever complained about the Holocaust jokes obviously was lacking in the humour department.

if im the only one who whatches his videos to the end im going to be like an outcast does anyone besides me go to the very end becuase im the only one that seemend to notices that he gos free cam in his last 2 reviews?

sorry for all the missspelled words=(

Perhaps for the sake of accuracy, Terry would be the programmer and Gonad would be the publisher/marketing bloke who thought that open-world driving sections were trendy and that the game should be released prematurely.

Ooohoo, this made me titter. S'very good, the music's still crunchy, and I laughed so hard my face hurts.

There's a few sound glitches, though: the first one I noticed when the Bad Character Awards are being listed, and the second was... er, at a different point that I've forgotten.

Lovely. Thank you very much! I'm going to go and have some tea.

How does Yahtzee manage to come up with his absolutely side-splitting content every time?

I totally agree, advertising that game content can be skipped doesn't exactly fill me with gleeful anticipation.

john.smith.100@hotmail.com
john.smith_100@yahoo.ca

great, now I have to sit threw my meeting, trying not to laugh my arse off. Thank you Yahtzee

Well done Yahtzee, an excellent return to form. Although your voice seems to have.. broken. In your 20's?

It's another review I am glad to have seen... ( hopefully this is the right grammar I'm using...)
Good work Yahtzee

Very funny, I was cracking up.

Wow even less people will buy this game than already were going to now.

-Seamus
~~~~Free D3 from the rainbow, the evil must prevail

Great stuff as always.

The intro's crap, though. Not nearly as funny as the intro/outro music choices.

I won the game and I did enjoy a large portion of it. But I'd say anyone that hates it has the right to do so. A lot of things were overlooked that could have been improved upon. And the final chapter is essentially an excuse to drag the game out for 2 more hours. The puzzles were interesting however and the fire is fun to play around with.

CrossLOPER:
I enjoyed the review and I think "Terry and Gonad" explain very well what has been going on in gaming.

I agree but I think gaming these days is more like "Terry" and the "Committee of Gonad" on a good day. The rest of the time it tends to look like it was designed by a collection of Rube Goldberg want-a-bes who think sharping a pencil should take 20 steps or more.

This week = EPIC FAIL

haha, this was one of my favourites.
Great review

btw, what happened to the old intros/outros?

Intro is still stupid, review was OK.

ElliottC666: "btw, what happened to the old intros/outros?"

Maybe they began costing money. SABAM, anti-fair use loophole et cetera. Or maybe clever marketeers thought the majority of the target ZP audience actually likes bland metal jingles?

Rock on, air guitar, it's still free to watch, the main part isn't affected by it,
all that.

I was a tad worried there that Yahtzee was slipping due to the rabid feedback on the last few reviews. This is an okay review; though the nonstop anal jokes are starting to wear very thin, it was good to see more on the plate than just those.

There is only a small wonder, however, on how his review would have faired if he played "Alone in the Dark" on, say, the Wii instead of the Xbox. Perhaps there would have been another broken television, some missing fingers, and a law suit in the works.

love the translation at the end really summed it up for me :P

First let me just say that I really like zero punctuation. Yahtzee is incredibly entertaining, and aside from his disdain for western rpgs I find myself agree with him on almost every review. That being said, I do find the inconsistencies that at starting to crop up bothersome. For example, in this review he complains about the inventory being too small. However, in an earlier review (I believe it was the Drakes Island whatever one) he objected to the fact that the main character seemed to have a jacket that could hold "8 plasma TVs" (I think that was the phrase Yahtzee used). Also, in the bioshock review he talked about how unrealistic it was that everything froze and patiently waited for you to finish hacking, and how that detracted from gameplay, but here Yahtzee says its bad that the game doesn't pause when you make equipment. I'm not one of those guys who notes every consistency error in a movie, but it strikes me that a reviewer ought to have a static notion of what makes a game good.

Also, the new into is fine, but please go back to using music that fits the game (or your review).

loved it, laughed till the end, and am I the only one that thinks the new music is great?

Particularly high quality today. I'm a fan of the new intro and pantomime outro as well.

sinnombre:
First let me just say that I really like zero punctuation. Yahtzee is incredibly entertaining, and aside from his disdain for western rpgs I find myself agree with him on almost every review. That being said, I do find the inconsistencies that at starting to crop up bothersome. For example, in this review he complains about the inventory being too small. However, in an earlier review (I believe it was the Drakes Island whatever one) he objected to the fact that the main character seemed to have a jacket that could hold "8 plasma TVs" (I think that was the phrase Yahtzee used).

Arguably a small inventory is bad when you're expected to pick up all the random deritus around you to make useful things out of. If they don't tell you explicitly what goes with what to make what you'll have to do a lot of experimentation.

Good piece. It's disappointing that they've abandoned the whole "investigative horror" element, apparently, though clearly that's the least of their problems. Atari has made some weird decisions since- well, they've always made weird decisions, back to when they were an entirely different company.

I still don't like the new music. It's obnoxious. It's like you're trying to say "I'm so tough! Guitars!", like this is the "Yahtzee makes fun of videogames" show*. It certainly doesn't seem something a "serious reviwer" should use.

*In before someone claims it's exactly that.

Wow that one was great, quite the return to form after the Webcomic thing.

Still don't like the next intro and outro's.

But this one delivered in the funny.

sinnombre:
First let me just say that I really like zero punctuation. Yahtzee is incredibly entertaining, and aside from his disdain for western rpgs I find myself agree with him on almost every review. That being said, I do find the inconsistencies that at starting to crop up bothersome. For example, in this review he complains about the inventory being too small. However, in an earlier review (I believe it was the Drakes Island whatever one) he objected to the fact that the main character seemed to have a jacket that could hold "8 plasma TVs" (I think that was the phrase Yahtzee used). Also, in the bioshock review he talked about how unrealistic it was that everything froze and patiently waited for you to finish hacking, and how that detracted from gameplay, but here Yahtzee says its bad that the game doesn't pause when you make equipment. I'm not one of those guys who notes every consistency error in a movie, but it strikes me that a reviewer ought to have a static notion of what makes a game good.

Also, the new into is fine, but please go back to using music that fits the game (or your review).

Oh come on now, he's not contradicting anything. There's a big difference between being FORCED to enter your inventory screen to make a firebomb in AitD (Because big enemies can ONLY be killed by fire) and choosing to hack a camera in Bioshock. Hacking a camera should be a challenge - it's a way to avoid combat and thus should require some effort to compensate for the effort you don't need to expend on the fighting. Likewise, since it can make your life significantly easier it shouldn't be as simple as walking up and pressing a "Join my team now" button.

Combining items in AitD is compulsory and a key part of combat - if you're out of molotov cocktails or fire bullets you're often well-and-truely screwed until you find more supplies somewhere, and when you do it's inevitable that you'll have to dick around with the inventory a bit before you can actually use them. If you were being chased by zombies and your only way to fight back was chucking a bottle of fuel at them and shooting it, would you do that as soon as you picked it up, or would you pick up said bottle, place it in your coat, then take five to ten seconds to re-equip said bottle and throw it. Forget actually combining the thing with something, just to equip it you have to deal with this delay.

As to inventory size - different games call for different things, and you're dealing in extremes here. It was the Silent Hill Origins review where he commented on the main character's jacket size, and he was perfectly justified in doing so. The game has a limitted weapon endurance system which presumably was implemented to make you have to be conservative with your weapon usage. Giving the player a ridiculously large inventory defeats that purpose, though, by ensuring that they'll be hard-pressed to actually run out of weapons.

In AitD's case, I didn't particularly feel as though the inventory was too small, but he is correct that by the end of the game you'll have occupied about a third of it with utility items that you either HAVE to have on you or will be bereft without (Lighter, knife, plot item, bullets), and it leaves you with little say in what you carry on the left side of your jacket (which holds the smaller items). But you can't compare what's said about one game's inventory with that of another - you can only compare how well the inventories fit their respective games.

Bravo, well done. Taking a stand against shitty game design and making terry and gonad publicly aware.

So...would buying this game make me:

1) An idiot?

or

2) Someone who wants to convey to the designers that he likes what they're doing so they'll try harder (less-hard?) to make the next game?

Great review. Always good to give something a good kicking that deserves it. Hmmm can you review Piers Morgan next time please :)

In other news, no the music hasn't grown on me yet. Not that my opinion counts for anything, but you asked and I'm a polite Englishman so...

I'm Surprised he didn't mention the awful ending, although killing the demented-demon-things did put me off too.

your the only reason i wake up anymore!

I loved the Terry and Gonad part.

That, and the skip part was so funny, because its true.

A great review, and it is rather sad that they had to note that you could skip the very bad bits of the game by flipping chapters.

I would like to raise my hand for a moment to say that, after working in a Holocaust museum for a summer, there most certainly are Holocaust survivors who are still kicking it.

RE: ending video- Wot, did nobody understand what Yahtzee was saying in the unsubtitled edition? Shame on ya'll, go back to body language 101. :D

Kidding. Great review. Shame about the game being crap. The concept seems decent, despite the horrible execution. And, really, can game designers please start portraying girls as more than a set of boobs and as integral, not-annoying characters?

ETA:

hitheremynameisbob:
lots of words and very good points

:thumbs up: Nice.

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