The Stupidest Thing You've Ever Heard

 Pages PREV 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 NEXT
 

Nice Tattoo, Is it yours?

Drakmeire:
when I got in a 7 minute argument with a girl who claimed Europe was a country and that Britain Spain Germany and every other area in Europe are states. way to go public school system.

You have my condolences.

OT: A while ago on here there was a thread entitled "So, Crash Bandicoot. He's a fox right?"

true sometimes i miss with attempts at humor...however in this case...

[quote="CJ1145" post="18.195864.6292343"][quote="catalyst8" post="18.195864.6290920
.[b]Never even heard of Italian wall lizards, and I've debated this with more well-informed men than you.][/b]

http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2008/04/080421-lizard-evolution.html

[b] Lizards Rapidly Evolve After Introduction to Island [/b]

oops....

savageoblivi0n:
true sometimes i miss with attempts at humor...however in this case...

[quote="CJ1145" post="18.195864.6292343"][quote="catalyst8" post="18.195864.6290920
.[b]Never even heard of Italian wall lizards, and I've debated this with more well-informed men than you.][/b] [/quote[

http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2008/04/080421-lizard-evolution.html

[b] Lizards Rapidly Evolve After Introduction to Island [/b]

oops....

Oops indeed. You fucked up that quote badly. As for the case here, that's what I would call micro-evolution. It's still recognizably the lizards from before, but with a new internal structure and slight physical changes that adapt it to its environment. Regardless, micro-evolution is proven, nobody's arguing that (I hope). It's the big, T-rex to chicken stuff that bugs me.

Sleekgiant:
There was this thread were the OP basically stated anyone who didn't know what his avatar meant was stupid, it was really not the brightest thing to do.

funny *claps sarcastically*

The fact that people pay money for "Twilight."

rescuer86:

Dumbest thing I have ever heard in person? I know a college educated woman who believes that the Holocaust never happened. It is just a conspiracy created by the Jews to help them take over the world.

interesting theory, hell of a set up i must admitt. has it occured to you she may have been joking?

I don't remember the full story, but I think someone compared Halo to Star Wars: A New Hope.

Now doing so isn't stupid. But the guy said something in the ways off:

"Halo is similar to Star Wars: A New Hope, and A New Hope is a flawless masterpiece. Therefore Halo is a flawless masterpiece"

Again, we are not at the stupid part.

The stupid part is where I said "Now, I love A New Hope, but even I can admit that it is far from flawless" to which the guy replies:

"I'm just a bigger Star Wars fan than you then".

Which is retarded.

And the guy couldn't shut up about his "College degree in arts".

How the fuck does that prove that you're right?

CJ1145:

savageoblivi0n:
true sometimes i miss with attempts at humor...however in this case...

[quote="CJ1145" post="18.195864.6292343"][quote="catalyst8" post="18.195864.6290920
.[b]Never even heard of Italian wall lizards, and I've debated this with more well-informed men than you.][/b] [/quote[

http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2008/04/080421-lizard-evolution.html

[b] Lizards Rapidly Evolve After Introduction to Island [/b]

oops....

Oops indeed. You fucked up that quote badly. As for the case here, that's what I would call micro-evolution. It's still recognizably the lizards from before, but with a new internal structure and slight physical changes that adapt it to its environment. Regardless, micro-evolution is proven, nobody's arguing that (I hope). It's the big, T-rex to chicken stuff that bugs me.

heh yeah i did..not quite sure what happened there :/ *chalks it up to pebkac error*

ah well yeah that i can understand, just thought i'd point you to some info on them

Subzerowings:
"Grammar and punctuation don't matter at all"
That one kills me.

fixed that for you.

OT: (usually told to musicians) "You're a sell-out because you make money!!"

/facepalm

antidonkey:
I'm going to have to go with the follow clip from youtube. Just listen and be prepared for the stupid about to pour from your speakers. The women seems to have a complete lack of knowledge about anything. I'm a bit shocked she can even talk.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jg0pDPK56Ys

the presenter there was abnoxious, you cant blame the woman for being open-minded and she DID make some valid points there

A random person:
That the Illuminati created love to control the masses. This explains why the Bible, another one of their mind control devices, has Jesus say the greatest love is laying your life down for a friend. Also, the Illuminati created the family in the stone age.

The above came from a men's rights conspiracy theorist known as Globalman.

This sounds like something that I would say to confuse 5th graders....

Neikun:
In my grade nine English class we were analyzing a short story about an alien sniper who had to shoot humans from his tower. A classmate suggested that the story took place on Earth, when I asked him why he felt that was he said it was because this planet had gravity.
I told him that all planets and even the moon has gravity to which he and the teacher both told me I was incorrect. I almost walked out of that classroom.

i want to find your teacher and laugh at him/her

Ham_authority95:

A random person:
That the Illuminati created love to control the masses. This explains why the Bible, another one of their mind control devices, has Jesus say the greatest love is laying your life down for a friend. Also, the Illuminati created the family in the stone age.

The above came from a men's rights conspiracy theorist known as Globalman.

This sounds like something that I would say to confuse 5th graders....

Try sane people.

Also, look up The Spearhead or Globalman (with the former check the comments). Believe me, that guy has a goddamn goldmine of unintentional comedy gold (so is The Spearhead itself), including a constant claim of "strawmen recapture" to free yourself from paying taxes or child support (to elaborate from what my sane mind could grasp, it's basically copyrighting yourself. I'm as confused as you are).

i just remembered something from the good ole pokemon red and blue days (you probably wont "get" this if you havet played those games) i was watching someone walk through the safari zone heading for the "secret house" at the end, i wondered why he was walking and asked why he didnt ride his bike to which he repiled "cos then ill run out of time quicker" then he made that annoying "duuuh" noise, somehow only highlighting what a brain-dead plonker he was

(in the safari zone you have a limited number of steps before youre kicked out, so obviously, riding a bike WOULD result in less time but only because youre moving faster, if he couldnt make that connection i almost wonder how his brain functions at all)

Skylane14:

Jedamethis:

Skylane14:
The Theory of Evolution.

Yeah, go ahead, laugh. I'm entitled to my opinion, and you can pry it from my cold, dead hands :P

If you don't mind my asking, why is it the stupidest thing you've ever heard?

Well, because it is often trumpeted as the end all, be all solution for where life came from, when it is actually laughably flimsy. I'm a very "prove it" sort of guy, and so far I haven't seen any proof that evolution is even possible. Natural selection, yes. Evolution? No.

I guess I should reform my statement a bit: The theory, as presented by Charles Darwin, while somewhat ridiculous, has merit, as a theory and a theory alone. The way it is presented, at least around here, as the Holy Grail of Science makes me absolutely sick to my stomach. That slavish devotion to a theory that hasn't even been proven as of yet tops every stupid thing I've ever heard from a religious fanatic, if only because religion, in and of itself, attracts fanaticism and fervor. It is built on the principle of believing the unbelievable. Science is supposed to be above that, but that sadly ceased being the case some time ago.

what are you talking about?!? you can see evolution with your own two eyes! you can see as fossils slowly change shape as you go on to younger fossils in sinc with the transformation of the earth! its there! its solid fact! anything else is just wishful thinking (aka - religion)

Skylane14:

Well, because it is often trumpeted as the end all, be all solution for where life came from, when it is actually laughably flimsy. I'm a very "prove it" sort of guy, and so far I haven't seen any proof that evolution is even possible. Natural selection, yes. Evolution? No.

oh and btw natural selection and evolution are pretty much the same thing, natural selection is the process through which evolution occurs, say, the freaky fish thats (100-1 odds) grown legs hops out of the water and all his brothers and sisters get eaten by sharks, his kids inherit legs - they survive etc

Since I'm so edgy and hip I'm going to have to go with religion.

I can't accept people for who they are so I'll use this irrelevant thread to explain my world views in a smart sarcastic comment.

"Don't use tampons because they'll break your virginity and you won't be able to have babies."

interspark:

Skylane14:

Jedamethis:

Skylane14:
The Theory of Evolution.

Yeah, go ahead, laugh. I'm entitled to my opinion, and you can pry it from my cold, dead hands :P

If you don't mind my asking, why is it the stupidest thing you've ever heard?

Well, because it is often trumpeted as the end all, be all solution for where life came from, when it is actually laughably flimsy. I'm a very "prove it" sort of guy, and so far I haven't seen any proof that evolution is even possible. Natural selection, yes. Evolution? No.

I guess I should reform my statement a bit: The theory, as presented by Charles Darwin, while somewhat ridiculous, has merit, as a theory and a theory alone. The way it is presented, at least around here, as the Holy Grail of Science makes me absolutely sick to my stomach. That slavish devotion to a theory that hasn't even been proven as of yet tops every stupid thing I've ever heard from a religious fanatic, if only because religion, in and of itself, attracts fanaticism and fervor. It is built on the principle of believing the unbelievable. Science is supposed to be above that, but that sadly ceased being the case some time ago.

what are you talking about?!? you can see evolution with your own two eyes! you can see as fossils slowly change shape as you go on to younger fossils in sinc with the transformation of the earth! its there! its solid fact! anything else is just wishful thinking (aka - religion)
oh and btw natural selection and evolution are pretty much the same thing, natural selection is the process through which evolution occurs, say, the freaky fish thats (100-1 odds) grown legs hops out of the water and all his brothers and sisters get eaten by sharks, his kids inherit legs - they survive etc

Um, no. There is no evidence of either of these claims. Name one, just one, that actually has a full record, and then we'll talk.

You don't need a full record to witness macro-evolution in process - like the aforementioned periodic table example. Even though dozens of elements were yet to be discovered, using the atomic model, scientists could determine that there would be elements that exist *in theory* for certain atomic numbers. They (Mendeelev or something, I forget his name) still allocated a space for the undiscovered elements. The fact that Silicon was yet to be discovered did not mean that the body of evidence/the model for atomic theory was incorrect.

Also, as Interspark suggests, natural selection is indeed basically the same thing as evolution. You appear to believe in micro, not macro evolution. To return to a former question - how do you think species like Homo-sapiens began to exist (dawn of civilisation approx. 8000BCE?)? Did they spring into existence one day? I'm not being sarcastic here; I'm genuinely interested how you think 'young' species started life.

How could you EVER have a full record anyway? That would mean billions upon billions of examples. Even then you could argue it was incomplete. Also, there is no such thing as a single fossil record for a species, as I outlined earlier that there is technically no such thing, in evolutionary terms

Skylane14:

interspark:

Skylane14:

Jedamethis:

Skylane14:
The Theory of Evolution.

Yeah, go ahead, laugh. I'm entitled to my opinion, and you can pry it from my cold, dead hands :P

If you don't mind my asking, why is it the stupidest thing you've ever heard?

Well, because it is often trumpeted as the end all, be all solution for where life came from, when it is actually laughably flimsy. I'm a very "prove it" sort of guy, and so far I haven't seen any proof that evolution is even possible. Natural selection, yes. Evolution? No.

I guess I should reform my statement a bit: The theory, as presented by Charles Darwin, while somewhat ridiculous, has merit, as a theory and a theory alone. The way it is presented, at least around here, as the Holy Grail of Science makes me absolutely sick to my stomach. That slavish devotion to a theory that hasn't even been proven as of yet tops every stupid thing I've ever heard from a religious fanatic, if only because religion, in and of itself, attracts fanaticism and fervor. It is built on the principle of believing the unbelievable. Science is supposed to be above that, but that sadly ceased being the case some time ago.

what are you talking about?!? you can see evolution with your own two eyes! you can see as fossils slowly change shape as you go on to younger fossils in sinc with the transformation of the earth! its there! its solid fact! anything else is just wishful thinking (aka - religion)
oh and btw natural selection and evolution are pretty much the same thing, natural selection is the process through which evolution occurs, say, the freaky fish thats (100-1 odds) grown legs hops out of the water and all his brothers and sisters get eaten by sharks, his kids inherit legs - they survive etc

Um, no. There is no evidence of either of these claims. Name one, just one, that actually has a full record, and then we'll talk.

Please, just stop. Not just you, stop this pointless argument. You're not going to change your mind, they're not going to change theirs, it's just getting pointless now.

OT: Read this on the internet about a college science lecture
Teacher: If an astronaut drops a pen on the moon, will it move or stay still?
Student: It will drop.
Teacher: Incorrect, as there is no gravity on the moon. (most of the class agreed with her)
Student: That makes no sense. If there is no gravity, then how do the astronauts stay there?
Teacher: They have heavy shoes...

Also, youtube comments

Go to any of the Clock Crew's pages on Newgrounds.......... i dare you

Neikun:
In my grade nine English class we were analyzing a short story about an alien sniper who had to shoot humans from his tower. A classmate suggested that the story took place on Earth, when I asked him why he felt that was he said it was because this planet had gravity.
I told him that all planets and even the moon has gravity to which he and the teacher both told me I was incorrect. I almost walked out of that classroom.

Looks like they were both riding the slow pony to the rubber forest.

*cookie for reference*

EDIT: Woah, 1500 posts? You don't look at it for a while, then you glance and it's surprising!

Teacher: 2 apples minus 1 apple
Student: 1 apple
Teacher: 2 carrot minus 1 carrot
Student: 1 carrot
Teacher: 2/3 minus 1/3
Student expresses herself by looking like a horse

And the above repeated itself FIVE F*CKING TIMES! God I hate thick people.

Arkvoodle:
The fact that people pay money for "Twilight."

I laughed myself off my chair good sir. YOU win the thread!

EDIT: Did you see the Twighlight woman comment on The Wolfman? GOD THAT WAS HILARIOUS

milkoy:

Sennz0r:
I once heard someone try to explain to our maths teacher that you can in fact divide by 0, using dividing pizza to further explain his theory. It was so stupid I can't even remember the specifics.

You can divide by zero; the result is infinity.

Basic math fail. Our entire mathematical system is built upon/based upon the zero, and you can't divide by it. If you could, the whole system would never have worked/existed in the first place and we would probably live in a very odd universe.

EDIT: I qualify Milkoy's post for this thread!

Wow, After reading most of the other responses,

I complimented a girl on her boots, and she asked me if they were "real leather made of cows?" "I replied, no Jackie, these are fake leather made of cows, real leather is made of woven human hair." And she believed me, funniest thing i have ever seen.

Today I learned from the village idiot that Furries are not much different from Transgendered people.

MCDeltaT:
My Sister (14): "When I get a pet I'm going to get a dragon"

Me: "Dragon's are fictional"

My Sister: "Yeah, that doesn't mean they aren't real"

Bearded Dragons? Technically Lizards, but soooo cute.

milkoy:

Sennz0r:
I once heard someone try to explain to our maths teacher that you can in fact divide by 0, using dividing pizza to further explain his theory. It was so stupid I can't even remember the specifics.

You can divide by zero; the result is infinity.

I always wondered about that.

nickd007:
The following actually took place today in study hall. Our teacher is Buddhist and so is his daughter, which for some reason bothers my friend (he's a Christian, albeit not a terribly good person. Weird, I thought that was what they were supposed to be...). I was talking to this friend of mine when the teacher's daughter walked in, and this is the conversation that occurred.

Friend: "God, what is this, a Buddhist convention?"
Me: "Dude, what's your problem with them?"
Friend: "She's probably only Buddhist because he is and he said it was good when she was growing up."
Me: "Isn't that why you're Christian? Because your parents were?"
Friend: "Well, yeah, but Christianity is good. Buddhism is a heap of shit."

What. The. Fuck.

Also, he seems convinced that Buddhism was started when Buddha said, "Hey, fuck God! I'm gonna sit around and gain weight for a few years, and then you guys should worship me." No shit. That is what my friend said word for word.

Your friend is an intolerant retard. I recommend getting another.

The following actually took place today in study hall. Our teacher is Buddhist and so is his daughter, which for some reason bothers my friend (he's a Christian, albeit not a terribly good person. Weird, I thought that was what they were supposed to be...). I was talking to this friend of mine when the teacher's daughter walked in, and this is the conversation that occurred.

Friend: "God, what is this, a Buddhist convention?"
Me: "Dude, what's your problem with them?"
Friend: "She's probably only Buddhist because he is and he said it was good when she was growing up."
Me: "Isn't that why you're Christian? Because your parents were?"
Friend: "Well, yeah, but Christianity is good. Buddhism is a heap of shit."

What. The. Fuck.

Also, he seems convinced that Buddhism was started when Buddha said, "Hey, fuck God! I'm gonna sit around and gain weight for a few years, and then you guys should worship me." No shit. That is what my friend said word for word.

 Pages PREV 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 NEXT

Reply to Thread

Log in or Register to Comment
Have an account? Login below:
With Facebook:Login With Facebook
or
Username:  
Password:  
  
Not registered? To sign up for an account with The Escapist:
Register With Facebook
Register With Facebook
or
Registered for a free account here