Ruin-A-Wish Foundation.

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Everyone hates that your criticism is just mindless vulgarity without any substance and, just like the Irate Gamer, you're forgotten (but without the stigma of plagiarizing AVGN).

I wish plagiarists were more commonly exposed and laughed out of their chosen fields.

The react like Steam Greenlight "devs", lashing out at every hint of criticism, false accusations of defamation and creating "work" which is nothing more than a bitter attack on anyone they don't like.

I wish characters didn't lose all their upgrades at the start of sequels.

characters now start sequels vastly overpowered and are completely unstoppable, removing any and all challenge.

I wish Alan Rickman was still alive.

He has no work.

I wish I was credited for bringing back the mullet and moustache look.

Sure thing, and everybody rightly hates you for it.

I wish mullets never existed.

What do pro-wrestlers and action movie heroes have to sport now?

I wish John McClane got some respect for his heroism.

Granted, the movies are loved by millions because (deep exasperated sigh) "fuck you it's Die Hard".

I wish Doug Walker never saw any Die Hard movies.

Why would one wish that on him?

I wish for an ultimate weapon.

Did you see the quote? His list of best Christmas movies is a definite low point.

You're arrested for possessing a weapon of mass destruction and raped in prison.

I wish human feet were more durable.

Now feet are hard as rock.

I wish there were no anti-science movements.

Granted we now exist only as pure balls of light floating through space and time eternally.
As a result though Game of thrones was never finished.

I wish to be brave.

You are Merida and your mother is either forcing you into marriage or a bear.

I wish we could switch between solid and light-beam bodies at will, and use this power to explore the Universe.

Good idea, just watch out for black holes and other hazards.

I wish capoeira was a genuinely dangerous fighting style.

Granted. It is declared inhumane by the U.N. and being caught using it is now punishable by lifetime incarceration.

I wish Mo Lewis had missed Drew Bledsoe. Tom Brady never becomes the starter and is traded to Cleveland.

Tom Brady kills his slaver overlords and escapes to a lawful world.

I wish to never hear or read another pro-athlete's name as long as I live.

Well, you can no longer live on earth then.

I wish I could use inception to convince my friend to divorce his evil wife.

All 3 dreams involve vilifying the wife in a way that accurately portrays her, but he remembers that you were there, knows that you have that dream-sharing machine, and the idea doesn't stick.

I wish to use time-travel to make video recordings of misunderstood historical events and long-extinct species.

The reality of these events are dull as dishwater and these species are noisy, lazy critters.

I wish hidden collectibles affected a game's story with positive, maybe negative results.

Granted but the one you want is behind that invisible wall.

I wish for noclip

All clips are removed from every video website on the Internet.

I wish every online game, namely MMOs, included a strict offline mode.

Some quests are harder without backup. Even though I approve this wish.

I wish it was possible for Xbox users to earn double Gamerscore after reaching a certain milestone and Playstation invented diamond trophy for every 5 platinums.

That Diamond Trophies work by a different metric (simple math) than the rest sends the gaming community into PS3 announcement levels of mockery that Sony never recovers from; and Xbox offers double the score after you've 100%ed their most broken games.

I wish DC would quit it with the corporate meddling crap and just let talented people work their magic.

DC becomes nothing more than "Marvel Light"

I wish I was a Master Exploder!

You've practically redefined what it means to explore: you've invented methods to ignore any temperature and pressure, making the depths of any planet or star a popular tourist destination. But the tourists pollute these cores so much that stars often fizzle out and planets collapse.

I wish "100%ed" wasn't considered a word by spellcheck.

BuildsLegos:
You self-exile to the Moon with your telepathic wife because your every whisper could shatter mountains. And do you REALLY want your significant other to know literally every thought in your head? Also the Hulk shows your pummeled corpse to the world as a declaration of war.

was that first part a reference to black bolt? if so well done sir.

back on topic:

Spellcheck instead recognizes something you find even more obnoxious as a word.

quite some time ago in this thread I wished for real life to have cheat codes. the ruination of such was the console is on Mars. so I wish I had the training and resources, as well as a space suit and shuttle to take me to said console on Mars.

Drake the Dragonheart:

BuildsLegos:
You self-exile to the Moon with your telepathic wife because your every whisper could shatter mountains. And do you REALLY want your significant other to know literally every thought in your head? Also the Hulk shows your pummeled corpse to the world as a declaration of war.

Was that first part a reference to Black Bolt? If so, well done sir.

So was the last part, Black Bolt was Hulk's first victim in World War Hulk.

You are able to survive the same way Matt Damon did on Mars, but there is no electric generator to power your console. Enjoy your poop potatoes!

I wish Assault on Arkham was made in live-action, and the movie actually called Suicide Squad was never made.

It's not very good for a number of reasons. (Which I'll let you imagine.)

I wish Kratos wasn't such a selfish, indifferent, brutal S.O.B.

He is longer any fun to play in the God of War Series.

I wish I could invent a microwave that makes reheated leftovers taste like they just came out of the oven. i.e. no more soggy pizza!

Granted but because we are all transendant balls of pure energy floating through space we don't need food anymore.
No pizza, Tacos, Bacon........

I wish for a strong drink.

Powerful enough to put you in a come for weeks.

I wish to fight drug dealers NARC style.

Due to a lack of depth in reality, you can only ever see straight lines that sometimes represent drug dealers to shoot.

I wish all console games had the vast swath of options that PC games do.

Granted but because of this extra power the console wars of 2009 killed us all..

I wish they still made Mega man games.

The in-game graphics look like the original Mega-Man box-art.

I wish EA never devoured beloved developers.

EA devours you instead.

I wish I was the legendary dragon knight, with the power to become the dragon!

While in your dragon form, other knights slay you.

I wish Roland Emmerich's Godzilla was just named something original but the movie was otherwise identical.

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