Mall Fight (ENDED: New One is on Forum Games)

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I run back to the food court and see Knife at a counter. I kill him with the nail gun. The waiter gives me a chocolate fudge ice cream and says "$23.40, please.". I kill the waiter as well and take the ice cream.

I speed back in the Homestuck store,I drop all of the crap I got,only keeping the DSWDCATIPAFAMGTPAACDP,and I take a Proton Cannon.

"how the fuck do ii even manage two hold thii2 2hiit?!" (Me)

"I just got stabbed by a sword made of plush dolls. How does that even work?"

Regardless of reason, I sit up on the floor clutching my spleen. I run in pursuit of Tox.

I respawn, kick Ren in the balls, and run of with my ice cream.

I run to the food court,and the idea of BLOWING EVERY FUCKING THING UP quickly gets away from my mind,as I see a bowl of chili.

"Chili." (Me)

I remember the first time I ate chili in Mall Fight 2,and nostalgia takes ahold of me.

I walk over to the suddenly larger bowl...AND I EAT THE FUCK OUT OF IT WHILE BLOWING EVERY FUCKING THING UP!

I respawn in a Homestuck Store, put on a shirt with a Cancer symbol, "LET'S GET ON WITH THIS SHIT!", I grab Homes Smell Ya Later, and head out.

I spot Knife and slash him and run away.

I spot Tox at the food court. I casually walk up slam his face in the bowl, drowning him in chili.

I respawn in the food court,and I quickly snap RaN's neck before he can take my DSWDCATIPAFAMGTPAACDP.

I snap my neck back into place.


I snatch the weapon out of Tox's hands and break it in two.


I grab my Proton Cannon,and I PROTON CANNON THE SHIT OUT OF RAN,before I start running around,rebuilding the DSWDCATIPAFAMGTPAACDP.


I die and respawn on the roof. I head for the TF2 store.

I sneak up beind Tox and slash his neck, "SWEET DREAMS, FUCKASS."

+1000 XP

I respawn,I double chainsaw/shotgun/flamethrow/machinegun/pistol and candy dispense the shit out of Waffles,I grab the bowl of chili,I run into the gun store,and I start crafting even more shit on my all-purpose gun.

You've crafted the Diamond Shotgun-With-Double Chainsaw Attached To It Plus A Flamethrower A Machine Gun Two Pistols A Candy Dispenser A Sniper Rifle And Sniper Scope Two Other Shotguns Three Machine Guns Two Grenades Launchers-Fuck this,I'm just calling it the Swiss Army Gun,or SAG.

I try holding up the gun,but it's so fucking stuffed with crap that I can't even hold it,or move it.

"Fuck this." (Me)

I un-craft the weapon,and I keep the shotgun and one chainsaw.

Connor walks up to Tox, "That damn thing is overpowered."

"No, I got rid of it."

"Oh, OK." says Connor as he fills Tox with 50 10mm rounds.

"LOL U iz TeH SUX0RZ!!!!" screamed the giant troll as he blasted connor with the fail cannon.

I respawn,and I CHAINSAW the viking dude to death. I then re-craft the chainsaw and the shotgun.

You've crafted the Chainsaw Shotgun!

I steal a Thompson Model M1A1,and a Model 1921,and I rush into the TF2 store.

Tox is mowed down by my Lvl. 4 sentry, which is very much akin to a Lvl. 3 sentry that has been crafted with a chainsaw, flamethrower, two pistols, a candy dispenser, a scoped sniper rifle, two shotguns, four machine guns, and two grenade launchers.

"Good thing I found those spare guns lying around."

I respawn,and I blow up the sentry with some C4,before CHAINSAW/SHOTGUN'in RaN to death.

I then throw away the Chainsaw Shotgun,and I run inside the Fallout 3/Fallout New Vegas store.

[OOC=Tox, the fallout guns are at the Gun Runners, which has a vedo-Dalek.]


I then turn around and run into the Gun Runners store,when I see a Dalek.


I then quickly run away,searching for a high-tech weapon store.

I respawn and hide near a corner. I hit Tox with a clothesline as he runs by.

I get hit,and I start sliding through the Mall,because apparently,somebody's been cleaning the floor,and I arrive into a high-tech weapon store,where I crash into a pile of Delta Rifles.

"WOO!" (Me)

I also get a hoverboard,and I start hoverboarding back to the Gun Runners.


I run back to the TF2 store and grab a grenade launcher from the pile of weapons.

I arrive at the Gun Runners.


I Delta Wave the shit out of the Dalek,killing/disabling it,I throw him in a pit of lava that was in a closet for some reason,and I start my equiping by grabbing a Gobi Campaign Scout Rifle,Holy Frag Grenades,and a Riot Shotgun.

The Dalek respawns as Tox walks off.

"lolololl, epic failz" says Connor, still under the affects of the fail cannon.

Tox notices and shoots Connor in the head.

Connor respawns in the Homestuck Store, "Man, what the fuck is all this crap?" he says as he takes a Large Pogo Hammer.

I Delta Wave the Dalek again,and I steal an Experimental MIRV with a whole bunch of mini nukes.

"AWW YEAH!" (Me)

I walk into the park,as the Dalek respawns again,and I test the MIRV,by firing a shot at a large steel tower that was built here for no apparent reason.

I fire the mini nukes,also killing me in the process,and causing all the trees to fall down,leaving only the clock tower standing,in the heaping pile of steel,trees,blood,and parts of a massive laser cannon.

I rush into Gun Runners and... oh, they're dead already.

I run out into the park.

I respawn on top of the clock tower,and I basejump back onto the ground,safely landing thanks to a parachute that I pulled out of my ass,just like Rico Rodriguez.

I then run back inside the food court,but not before throwing Holy Frag Grenades all around the place.

"That gives me an idea."

I run to the blacksmith.

"Sup." says the Blacksmith to RaN.

I crash into the food court,and I just prepare myself to drink wine,when I see a door leading to a stairwell,and most likely the maintenance tunnel.

"Oh yeah!" (Me)

I start running down the stairs to the lower floors of the Mall (No fucking relation to anything in Mall Fight 2).

There,I find some drilling gear that I use to drill back to Gun Runners,right under the Dalek,causing him to fall an extremely high fall,and since he always respawns in the same place,it becomes an eternal life-death cycle,while I grab a Tesla Cannon and run out of the store.

RaN: "Nothing much."

Smithy: "Same as usual?"

RaN: "Nah. You got any bear traps?"

Smithy: "Bear traps? Heh, I can do better than that."

The blacksmith hands me a crate of landmines.

RaN: "Holy shit, that's awesome! Where'd you get this stuff?"

Smithy: "Pawned it from some guy I met back in Iraq."

I pick up the crate.

RaN: "Thanks!"

Smithy: "Careful with that! That stuff's potent!"

I lay landmines around the Homestuck store.

I rush into the Homestuck store,and I get killed by the landmines.

I respawn in the Homestuck store,and I get killed by more landmines.

This goes on for a while,until there's no more mines,and I can finally get myself the Fluorite Octet,before I put on a T-Shirt with the Scorpio symbol on it.

"Aww yeah,8itches." (Me)

While Tox is still inside, I lay a few more landmines near the entrance of the Homestuck store.

I roll the dices,and I end up with 4/6/7/4/6/7/8/1,which results in an explosion,triggering the landmines in advance.

"Ok,I didn't see that one coming." (Me)

I grab the dice,and I then stab myself to death with a Caledscratch.

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