Zero Punctuation: Left 4 Dead 2 & New Super Mario Bros Wii

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Hmmm Bowser can breathe fire and stomp a lot. The tank can stomp a lot and jump really far.... Well being able to jump really far has defeated Bowser for 20 years so the Tank would obviously win.

Best way to kill a tank is to set it on fire.

Bowser would win.

[edit]Also, New Super Mario Bros Wii is actually tons of fun. It plays a bit like Mario Bros 3, but is that honestly a bad thing?

Oh man I dont think anyone could have said it better than Yahtzee. Awesome reviews I completely agree with.
I've always viewed Nintendo as an abuser of its customers so I'm not surprised at all that their latest Mario is the same tired old shit but with rage inducing co-op. As for L4d2, I only recently started playing the original with some friends so skrew shelling out more money for an expansion pack labeled as a full game.

Shiva H Vishnu.

I have never heard a more delightfully acerbic and bitter shredding of a game since ... actually I think this review has finally toppled the idea that Yahtzee cannot better himself.

11/10. Sheer unadulterated brilliance. Yahtzee should get flu more often if this is how he comes out of it.

Root's Seal of Approval on this.

I'm not sure if that was a review or just getting anger out..still entertaining.

Bowser vs Tank?

Depends? Are we talking about go-carting?

Good review. I was so excited about Super Mario Wii, when I got it, I was disappointed that they managed to basically only rehash Super Mario 3 and allow 4 players.
Not that Super Mario 3 was bad.. but like... I played the balls off that game already.

Oh and while I disagree on his view of L4D2, he still made some hilarious points and an even funnier credits animation.

I like Sew Buper Wario Nros. Bii. It's a fun game. And the co-op is a cluster fuck of insane enjoyment.
Much better than Yahtzee's portraying it. But then again he didn't like GhostBusters much or Smash Bros. Brawl much either...

Still given a choice between the two of them, I'd go with the new Mario game. In fact I think I will.

Don't worry Yahtzee, I'll be your friend! :)

I think putting two games into the same review is a little bit of a cop-out, meaning you'll only have to do half as much work searching for things to complain about in each game, but it was still entertaining to say the least. Besides, I suppose you could be forgiven for trying to do as many reviews as possible, seeing as Chrissy is coming and there are a bunch of new releases coming out. I hope you'll try to stick to one game at a time from now on though.

I agree with him on alot of these points. Especially on New Super Mario BRothers Wii.

however, I guess I enjoy that they didn't change much. It's really nice on the nostalgia.

Wow i seem to be getting that horrible neurotic disease where you start to know almost exactly what Yahtzee is about to say before the review starts. I agree on all parts with the left 4 dead 2 review. I can not wait to purchase/steal/ beat down a hooker to obtain and play this game. Mario seems to be a big *rent* for me. I'll probably be playing it single player, because it just seems to roll better that way.

In the words of my friend, this is how he describes Gabe Newell and the development of HL2 Ep3:
"Programing games is hard! If you leave me alone then it will be finished. Can we buy another mod to buy some more time?"

also whats with Nintendo releasing games designed to have some one to three players dead by the end of the night? (FF Crystal Cronicals, The Four Swords, and now this)

Actually it's Springfield 1903, .30-06 is its calibre.

Heh, that was just what I needed to lift me from the depths of a crappy day.

My favorite quote:

"As the skeptical friend said to the inventor of the Feces-powered helicoptor, 'This Sh*t will not fly!'"

Oh, Gosh, that made the video for me. Excellent work, as always.

Anything to make the fanboys and idiots contemplate, eh Yahtzee?

Fine, fine. I'll play your game, ya rogue. Tank kills Bowser. He flattens King Koopa easy after he knocks the scaly green goon on his back.

So true about Nintendo. It's just tragic that they have suhc a loyal fanbase who seem to just lay back and take it. But then I suppose they're shooting themselves in the foot because when those fans grow out of gaming they'll be left with nothing!

Also I agree, where the hell is HL2Ep3?!

Glad your all better yahtzee!


hilarious highlight to my week, as per usual. nice to see he's got his headset voice back.

he hasn't discouraged me from getting mario bros wii, since personally i love the old-style l to r way of playing mario (since why i liked super paper mario), although why in all humanity there are two toads i don't understand. surely there could have been one toad and one, i dunno, evil mario or something? hehe, actually, they could have made players 3 and 4 wario and waluigi. that would've been awesome.

I'm facepalming so hard at this thread, with people lauding and defending what Nintendo does, and then agreeing that L4D2 was 'too soon.' Go back to your copypasta Mario and Zelda games, the rest of us have grown out of Nintendo's bullshit.

Didn't I just point out a few pages back that comments like these are the reason why Nintendo's so quick to fall back on the big name franchises in their vaults again? Shut up. Enjoy the game for its fun factor instead of bitching about it being another Mario game. You stupid cunt.



Edit: You'd think it'd be obvious that anyone who comments without seeing the review is suspended, why don't people realize that? Wait, don't answer that, stupidity has no clear reasoning.

It's fun for me and Furburt. We place bets on how many will get banned each week!

LOL! Sounds like it could be a new weekly thread. "Place Bets - ZP Weekly Banning Numbers".

May have to figure out a way to shorten the name, but that'd be awesome heh.

I honestly don't feel out of line here when i say WORST EPISODE YET. seriously yatzee. have you run out of matireal? i think that i have heard every joke you used in that video befor... used by you. the # thing was from the orange box, the name thing in riddick, and the lack of imagination thing in everyone of your videos about Nintendo. on a compleatly unrelated note, I have enjoyed all of your other videos and hope your next one fix the above probloms. Thank you.

Good episode.


It's great seeing the correlation between the monotonous Mario franchise and the zombie fad that's stayed a couple years past its welcome.

This Mario installment felt very monotonous. Considering Nintendo's counterintuitive push for nostalgia and innovation, is there any conceivable way to revitalize the side-scrolling platformer and its credibility, or do you stand by your previous reviews that Mario, like many of Nintendo's first-party titles, need to be scrapped altogether?

On the question of innovative side-scrolling platforming, do you feel that Little Big Planet was a step in the right direction? I've not played it.

I can't agree any more. L4D2 is just an L4D expansion, nothing more. Its just a a bunch of new maps, a few useless melee weapons and thats it. And about New Super Mario Bross Wii, well, its a ripoff from New Super Mario bross DS wich is a ripoff from Super Mario 3, so its not a big surprise that it dont have anything new(as the title says, btw)

You can't say that new game of a franchise is a rip-off of an older game in the same franchise. That's like saying halo 3 is a ripoff of halo 2 which is a ripoff of halo the original.

I found the L4D2 part of the review to be accurate, I hated it as much as the first one. My friends and I however can't seem to put Mario Bros Wii down.

sooo L4d 2 wins?

I agree. L4D2 is L4D1 with some makeup and a foot up its ass.

you raised an important point...where the f@#k is half-life 2: episode 3 dammit?!!

Not having looked though the eight pages (at the time of typing) of posts, plus any other New Super Mario Brothers Wii topics that may exist on The Escapist, I'm not sure if this has been mentioned yet. I was perusing the latest volume of Edge Magazine when I came across an ad for "NSMBW", as it shall now be called, which seemed to confirm that the Nintendo marketing bods are either a little to full of their companies own self importance or have gone completely loopy.

The heading for ad went something along the lines of "Great Moments in History"

Just below that was the invention of the wheel, which is fair enough, but below that itself was, you guessed it, a picture of Mario, Luigi and the two generic Toads (all looking like twats) accompanied by the legend "New Super Mario Brothers Wii".

Really? The release of this Mario game comparable to the invention of a wheel? That's quite a stretch if ever there was one.

3:20 of this is by far the most true thing and meaningful thing that Yhatzee has ever said. I agree so much.

Uh, isn't it a bit hypocritical for Yahtzee to review Left 4 Dead 2, despite the fact that he seems to hate online multiplayer with an almighty vengeance rivalling that of the various denizens of Mount Olympus? Or New Jersey?

definitely the funniest for a couple of weeks now!

and I called how he was going to react to New SMB Wii...

Ah, the ZP comments thread... the ultimate group-think exercise.

I loved the Shawshank Redemption reference. Great film. :)

Either way, that was an awesome, enjoyable review. Thanks, Yahtzee!

L4Y Duke:
Uh, isn't it a bit hypocritical for Yahtzee to review Left 4 Dead 2, despite the fact that he seems to hate online multiplayer with an almighty vengeance rivalling that of the various denizens of Mount Olympus? Or New Jersey?

Well, he did review games like EVE Online, which are strictly or intended to be multiplayer only. I think he has no problem reviewing multiplayer only games, just has a problem with weak single player, with competitive multiplayer. Maybe he has an exception for co-op games.

either that or he reviews whatever he gets only, discounting GAME TRADERS ROBINA.

Bowser would definitely win. He'd just spit a flame on the tank and back step until the tank collapses in a pile of flaming super zombie.

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