Zero Punctuation: Portal 2

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They have to be taken with a grain of salt, but Yahtzee's complaints are definitely valid. In particular, the cavernous testing facilities in the middle bog down a little. I think they're really cool and kind of a fascinating look into the history of Aperture Science, but I'm not gonna lie, it got a bit bland after a while.

Wish he'd said something about Wheatley, though, if only just some offhanded comment that it's in contrast to how the British are usually characterized in video games. Although I guess it's not really that he's actually a Brit, more of just he has an accent, come to think of it.

I agree with the fact that the puzzles are easier, and obviously there are long connecty bits, but I don't think this detracts from the game. I think it comes down to this - Portal 2 isn't Portal. It's different. Not better, but not worse - it's just different. The co op brings a huge amount of puzzle goodness, anyways.

I COMPLETELY agree with the bit about carrying co op though - We're gonna need continual puzzles to make that work well. I think Valve is capable of releasing a few Portal chambers now and then, though.

AssassinJoe:
If Portal 3 takes place in space, how would momentum work?

MAGIC! That's how!

I gotta agree with Yahtzee. The biggest, BIGGEST problems with sequels is that they gotta jump over that height the bar set into by its original incarnation. If the bar is low enough, like, say, Final Fantasy, well hey, no problems there. But "Portal" pretty much sets up a friggin' GOLD standards for the sequel to topple, and like every single nerds who screamed "HAN SHOT FIRST!" all over the internet, you just know how that particular story is going to end.

Also, I'm of the mindset of "smaller dev teams is better", in which that there will not be too much meddling in its planning and execution. A buddy of mine says it best: "too many cooks spoils the broth", and that's exactly what we're seeing here. Seriously, this game would've benefit much, MUCH more if they had decided to call it something else other than "Portal 2".

Summed up my thoughts pretty well. Glad I got a refund.

Ephraim J. Witchwood:
Summed up my thoughts pretty well. Glad I got a refund.

You do realize that if you agreed with what he said, then you thought the game was good. Why would you get a refund if you thought it was good?

I don't get why anyone would complain that Yahtzee tends to be negative. Do they want him to lower his standards? Or do people actually think that this is some kind of golden age of games? That would require a very short memory.

Well, can't say I'm surprised, it's practically impossible to live up to the first Portal.

Portal 2 was just missing something for me... lets hope the dl content can make up for it.
that being said i really did enjoy the game and i think Glados is funnier in this one XD it was a hard thing to live up to though, so it did well imo :D

wiiwiieddie:

Ephraim J. Witchwood:
Summed up my thoughts pretty well. Glad I got a refund.

You do realize that if you agreed with what he said, then you thought the game was good. Why would you get a refund if you thought it was good?

Well, other than that.

I like Portal, will have to give Portal 2 a go. Most likely rental, I've been burned with sequels before.

it sure is a good game. i enjoyed it. but of course its not as good as part 1. but i also missed the cake in it and some of the humor we know from part 1. its still a good game and i can only recommend it. not every sequel is good but this one is.

Kinda surprised to not see Yahtzee call Portal 2 a rehash/money-grab. He rags on and on about Nintendo doing this with their franchises (iteration instead of innovation) but doesn't even pretend to mention it here.

To recap: Portal 2 is only marginally longer than Portal, costs significantly more, doesn't change the gameplay in any meaningful way, the puzzles have been dumbed down and linear-ized, and has a vanity DLC cash shop. Also, there was no good reason to bring back GLaDOS, and she sticks out like a sore thumb of mediocre when standing next to Wheatley and Cave Johnson. Oh, and the loading screens.

Oh, and I guess I should mention that I loved Portal 2 and would recommend it to anyone, but there is definitely more negative here than simply "It's not as glorious as the original."

This seemed very much like the SotC review. He liked it, but it didn't live up to the first. I'd say it was the first but fleshed out into a full game instead of a demo, but that's just me. I feel it was what the first needed to really live up to the Half Life universe.

I didn't realise quite how unnecesarily cynical Yahtzee is until now...

I can't think of any criticism for this video. Usually, I can at least say that there's some minor quibbling difference between Yahtzee's opinions and my own (OK, usually one big honking difference), regardless of how much I agree with the rest of the commentary, but I think he exactly summed up my own opinions of the game.

So this video:me::portal:yahtzee.

Cant wait for Port3l

Portal 1 had the element of surprise. Something Portal 2 (ARG's and all) clearly doesn't have. And Portal didn't have expectations, Portal 2 does. There was MUCH more pressure to deliver and to VALVe's credit; they handled it BEAUTIFULLY. Portal 2 is UNDENIABLY a better game than Portal 1 because despite the 1 centimeter drop in quality there was a comparatively 1 KM jump in total content!

Besides which; Yahtzee is a CRITIC. It is his JOB and WAY OF LIFE to be critical, It just so happens Portal 2 has much more content to be critical of.

There was one cake joke in it, but it's well hidden. Once you portal into the room which GLaDOS has set up as a trap to kill you, shortly before the roughly half-way point in the game, the door which falls down reads "blah blah blah and Cake Distribution Room".

And I'll say this, Portal 2 probably has the best writing in any video game ever.

I've never played any portal game, I may rent it but I can't imagine why people like it so much... Must be a you have to play to know thing so that's what i'll do :P

Please review Mortal Kombat 9? That would be awesome.

Wow, this is the first time I've ever watched any of this... Yahtzee guy's videos, but what the heck! All he does is find ways to be unhappy!

Haha, ok ok just kidding. Mostly.

I hope they make Half life 2 episode 3 FIRST before portal 3 if they decide to make another portal game.

trollpwner:

Russian_Assassin:
To be honest, I liked the second Portal better. Maybe because it let me explore the personality of my arch enemy some more, or maybe it was figuring out the story behind Aperture. All and all, I regard both Portals (the games, not the actual portals) as two of the best games I've played in my life.

Also, how could someone not like the turret opera?

I agree. This is the first time I have been really dissapointed with a ZP video. There really wasn't anything WRONG with portal 2, it was just DIFFERENT. So why did he complain because it wasn't small-scale? It was better in EVERY way!

Why are you so disappointed? he never said at all that portal 2 was a bad game he only said that portal 1 was better because of how utterly mind bending it was playing because it was the first time anyone had experienced such unique game play. I'm very happy that he brought up a point that no other person has so far, can't you respect that?

the whole first chapter is is the part that killed it. They should have made it a optional tutorial, because it was so boring it failed to get my dad to leard how to controll FPS games on PC. Then I let my sister try the levels starting where you pick up wheatley and she liked what she was playing from the start. Damn you production values, mofos spent 99 days making the physics for motel room destruction.

Random Fella:
I've never played any portal game, I may rent it but I can't imagine why people like it so much... Must be a you have to play to know thing so that's what i'll do :P

Please review Mortal Kombat 9? That would be awesome.

Im pretty sure thats been banned in Australia, he wouldn't be allowed to import it and then do a video on it.

I'm getting really tired of this "it's popular, now it sucks" mentality, especially as I see people make the point over and over with regard to the humour in Portal.

Also, most of the people talking about how "easy" the puzzles were need to (a) go back and play Portal and (b) realize how the puzzle design has shifted focus. People are not remembering how easy the overwhelming majority of puzzles were in Portal. Most of the "hard" puzzles in Portal were reflex tests, forcing you to fly through and quickly place a number of portals while carefully controlling your falls. They were difficult from a platforming perspective rather than a puzzle perspective. Portal 2 did away with most of the reflex-testing and actually added some complexity to the puzzles. Also, you have to consider that you had no prior training with the gameplay mechanics going into Portal whereas you have potentially an entire game's background going into Portal 2. As for the linearity of the puzzles, I don't even know what to say. You went through a NUMBERED SEQUENCE in Portal. Portal 2 isn't any less linear, but I don't really see how it is (or really could be) more linear.

And I flat-out do not understand some of his complaints in the video. There are too many sequences where you have to try to find portal surfaces and where the path forward is difficult to find, yet the game is too hand-holdy by giving you directions? These things cannot both be true. And given the story, wouldn't you expect the game to point you in the right directions since it's part of a controlled laboratory test?

It would have been nice to see him stress more how great a game it is and also mention how it can't quite live up to the predecessor rather than the opposite stressing. This feels vaguely dishonest - if you realise that your review is being biased by comparison to the predecessor, you should try to avoid that bias, not embrace it.

ImBigBob:

Yopaz:

ImBigBob:
I'm surprised you didn't mention the frequent and annoying loading screens.

You know if you play this game on a PC like you should that cuts loading times a lot, never had an issue with them.

Great review, I was surprised to see that he like it this much, I would even say it seemed like he loved it, just not as much as the first one.

All I have is a laptop, which can't run anything more advanced than Torchlight. For a game like Portal, it lags like hell, so I'm playing it on PS3, thank you very much.

Besides, Uncharted 2 was a hell of a lot better looking than Portal, and I don't think there was a loading screen in the entire game. Every new locale was completely seamless. Meanwhile, Portal 2 has you exploring interesting locales and just when you're getting interested, -LOADING-.

So you got a crappy laptop and tries to play Portal 2 on it with bad results... That's kinda like watching a movie on a 14 inch TV and complain that the movie's hard to watch because of it. Annoying, but not the movie's fault.

He hit the nail on the head
portal 2 is not as much as a puzzle game as portal thats why I cant replay it as much as portal
also WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO THE ADVANCE MAPS!!!!!

Agree entirely. Portal 2 was good... but it wasn't great, like Portal 1.

They didn't do anything useful with CJ; GLaDOS was toned down; Wheatley suddenly being "a moron" because the game decided to start calling him one was really clunky. And Yahtzee is right - the "squint around this environment till you find the one portalable surface" stuff got old really quickly.

It wasn't bad, but it wasn't as perfect as Portal 1.

To be honest, the funniest bits were in the trailers.

Right on again, Yahtzee!

TimeLord:
No memes?

Well my response to that is Lemons and Spaaaaaaaaaaaace!

Your avatar scares me greatly.

I think I understand Yahtzee's beef with Portal's fans. You see, I was there.

A few years ago, the Australian Centre for the Moving Image (ACMI) in Melbourne hosted a video game exhibition. And there were free public lectures presented by the museum. Mr Croshaw was a guest speaker. The lectures were pretty packed. Only a couple hundred people could fit in the room, and roughly three times as many people wanted in. So, the hardworking staff, some of them volunteers helping out on the weekend, tried to funnel an overcapacity crowd through their facility. They handled themselves with grace, courtesy, and elegance.

Less so the crowd. I got into the afternoon lecture. It was cool! TV personalities and game design types, and we got a great panel discussion of game criticism and whatnot. But.

But, a mob of feral fanboys chose to hammer on the glass doors and whoop it up. You see, Yahtzee was fresh, new, popular! So it was necessary to make him unpopular with the venues that might choose to host him again one day.

And that's not even the worst! As we were filed out of the hall, a mob of around 150 dickheads, all clogging the foyer area and the reception desk where the lovely staff were trying to work - helping out visitors, directing people to the toilets, explaining the exhibits - well, they decided to start singing.

One or two selfish idiots kicked it off. "This was a triumph" they began to drone in their hideously untrained nerd-quack. See, a couple of them had caught sight of Ben Croshaw, who had not that long before flashed a "Best Game EVAR!" caption on one of his video reviews. So, clearly he was yearning to be barked at, for almost five minutes, by a herd of dribbling morons.

I remember standing aside, and chatting to a buddy, commenting on the display of fuckery unfolding. She was all: "Oh, they're just excited". But I had to break it down for her.

You're a nerd, right? That's why you like this stuff. Now, recall times in YOUR life when you have been affronted by, say, mobs of drunken arseholes bellowing at each other of their excitement about the latest sports event in their lives. They take over the public space - street, pub, train, whatever. And they FORCE you to listen to them. You can't ignore them, you can't even move past them to your chosen destination. They are being DICKS.

And that's what was going on that day at ACMI. Gamers, geeks, the crowd that should be proud to be different, were making utter bastards of themselves, bringing shame upon everyone around.

I caught sight of Mr Croshaw's face several times during the lecture, and afterwards, and he seriously looked like he was regretting his career decisions to date. I think we're lucky he decided to carry on with ZP and the Mana Bar and anything else he has going on, because the fans almost killed the joy for him that day.

AssassinJoe:
If Portal 3 takes place in space, how would momentum work?

Momentum exists in space...

Perhaps you mean gravity and jumping?

p=mv

CaptainCash:
I hope they make Half life 2 episode 3 FIRST before portal 3 if they decide to make another portal game.

i agree with you, i've been waiting for episode 3 for a long time now.....

Yahtzee sounds a bit like a videogame hipster in this review. At least he admits he'd be salivating over it if it didn't have to be compared with the first, but still...

I'M IN SPACE

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