Zero Punctuation: Sniper Elite V2

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canadamus_prime:
You jerk off to Disney Princesses?

... you don't?

OT: I'll admit it, the wee-poo joke got me too.

The Gentleman:
The ultimate irony? That game is based on the actual US/Soviet raiding of V2 scientists in Germany. In it's attempt for realism, the game becomes boring...

That's what I was thinking: they forgot the part where you round up Nazi scientists to bring back to the US to build missiles.

Misspost. Ignore this! Or Delete it. Either :P

Falseprophet:

The Gentleman:
The ultimate irony? That game is based on the actual US/Soviet raiding of V2 scientists in Germany. In it's attempt for realism, the game becomes boring...

That's what I was thinking: they forgot the part where you round up Nazi scientists to bring back to the US to build missiles.

Yes, but that goal was two fold:

1) Get scientists

2) Don't let Russians get the remaining scientists

I imagine they don't exactly need a sniper for number 1...

i'm pretty sure Yahtzee would get along with that Russian woman, seeing as to how she HATED HIM

Lol, I understood what the Russian girl said, "I despise you".

trollpwner:

Raiyan 1.0:

DVS BSTrD:
Even if you don't get to kill Hitler, as long as you end the game killing Nazis it'll still feel like a...

*puts on sunglasses*

...Goodwin

Alright, that was good, I did Nazi that coming.

O.K., stop please. This is just getting reich-diculous.

EDIT: ninja'd. Blimey, this is as bad as the time we had that page about a guy who killed his family with a sword and we had 7 pages of blade-related puns.

EDIT 2: Oh, here it is.

Hey, these Nazi jokes are Goring nowhere, Anne Frankly, I find them Heilarious.

Woodsey:

canadamus_prime:
You jerk off to Disney Princesses?

... you don't?

Since most Rule 34 "artwork" is sickening to the point where I want to gouge out my eyeballs, no.

Whoop! WAAAAAALLLLEESSSS

Grey Day for Elcia:
Lmao. I kind of hope you aren't kidding, just because that would be so hilariously insane.

Well, I just googled and game sites are confirming it was pre-order exclusive "DLC." I don't know if it'll remain exclusive, but the fact that it's DLC means it's an additional part of the game. Which is, of course, hilariously insane.

Balkan:
She said
I despise you !
and btw the funnyest ZP in a year .

TheIronRuler:
Lol, I understood what the Russian girl said, "I despise you".

"I hate you" actually.

did the US even have Sniper units in WW2? I know Russians had some nasty bad asses who ranked up hundreds of kills and so did Germans and Brits to some extent but I think the US didn't have any Sniper units and mostly just let armored units take front or in the case of a lot of green soldiers "went prone and waited for German snipers to pick them off one by one".

LOL at my own flag being represented in such a way.

yay for the accurate representation of the welsh!

only a minor issue though, all our world war 2 era tanks have sheep's wool covering them so we can hide them in fields near our borders.

It will soon be our land!!

The single picture bit at the end was pretty damn ingenious this time.

DanHibiki:
did the US even have Sniper units in WW2? I know Russians had some nasty bad asses who ranked up hundreds of kills and so did Germans and Brits to some extent but I think the US didn't have any Sniper units and mostly just let armored units take front or in the case of a lot of green soldiers "went prone and waited for German snipers to pick them off one by one".

Ima let you finish, but the Fins had arguably the most successful sniper of all time.

fanklok:
Yahtzee you didn't even mention getting to assassinate hitler. ASSASSINATE HITLER.

Pre-order DLC only. If he "picked it up" as a spur of the moment thing, like he was describing, it wouldn't have been a pre-order.


I enjoyed this game a lot. Once I'm done with the co-op I'm going to stick it on my shelf for a year before playing it again. It's short, sweet, not much replay value but definitely a keeper.

I love watching me a nazi's bones torn apart from a bullet o' mine. Best part of the game, really <.<

DVS BSTrD:
Even if you don't get to kill Hitler, as long as you end the game killing Nazis it'll still feel like a...
*puts on sunglasses*
...Goodwin

Oh you smart bastard!

In case you're wondering what the Russian girl said while skipping along with Yahtzee: "I hate you." Aw, that's so cute. :-)
And so ninja'd. :-(

Yahtzee's been leaning pretty heavily on the English->Russian google translate lately, the Russian temp worker might not have been a passing phase.

Try the Swedes or Poles one of these days, now those f****** are crazy.

I just realized Yahtzee used a Hitcher-hiker's guide to the Galaxy reference back there with the flying whale.

Classic.

NameIsRobertPaulson:
But I hate sneaky games.

Having played it I can tell you its not all sneaky sneaky. You are given a pistol and SMG and can just sprint through the levels mowing down all the enemies.

The dick jokes felt really forced this time. Methinks it's time to find some new jokes.

"SNIPER ELITE: WE POO" Even yahtzee couldn't hold back the laughter! Just like that time he mentioned "experience with relationships [SNORT]" in his "Catherine" review.

And the puns, Oh God the puns, MAKE IT STOP!!!

It hit me while watching this video that the whole Russians-as-villains thing is something developers do to get back at the Russian gaming community, who from what I hear are... problematic.

I hope Yahtzee realizes that you DO get to kill Hitler in this game.

Disney princesses huh?

Stop reminding me that I can't afford diablo 3 escapist!

DanHibiki:
did the US even have Sniper units in WW2? I know Russians had some nasty bad asses who ranked up hundreds of kills and so did Germans and Brits to some extent but I think the US didn't have any Sniper units and mostly just let armored units take front or in the case of a lot of green soldiers "went prone and waited for German snipers to pick them off one by one".

All sides had snipers in world war 2, but this was back in the days when stalking living people and blowing their terrified, shell-shocked brains out through a scope so powerful you can see whether or not they're married was considered a somehow unsavoury pastime rather than fuckin' awesome bro! so they didn't talk about it.. except the Russians who as you rightly said were totally into that.

Snipers in world war 2 would not generally be taken prisoner if captured.

It makes the current 'cult of the sniper' seem a bit weird, in context. Maybe we've not had enough wars with routine use of snipers by both sides..

Oh! Boyo! What's your beef with the Welsh?

or should that be lamb?

Marik Bentusi:

Personally I thought the game was extremely dull and repetitive, especially with the unbelievable health regen making it really damn hard to die on any difficulty level. The gore shot gimmick is interesting at first, but after replaying a demo for some time you pretty much got the whole experience in my opinion.
Story is really bland (oh look we must stop the not-a-nuke), characters are pretty much nonexistent, it's invisible-wall-level linear. Tutorial took that up to eleven.
Plus the AI was so balls-to-the-walls stupid you basically got no enjoyment out of stealthily outsmarting them. At least in Thief: Deadly Shadows the AI was so stupid it was hilarious again, and if they found you they could still knock a considerable amount off your health bar before you can initiate countermeasures.

I like how they made sniping on harder difficulties a bit more skill-requiring and by extension more rewarding when you blow up a group by shooting a grenade like it's a pinto, but between that and the killcam novelty there was nothing about this game that struck me as worthwhile.

Basically this, although I will add that the rigid enemy spawns annoyed me.
I spend 15 minutes silently clearing a bridge of nazis, lining up my shots to get the most kills per bullet, and waiting til the sound is masked by bombs, and what do I get? More nazis spawn out of a door when I am halfway across the bridge! I reloaded and tried waiting for them, I even tried to get their attention by shooting at the door out of which they were running, but no. They spawn when you cross the bridge. And it's like this the entire game!

For me that ruined the game. I love preparation and sneaking, and nothing makes me feel cooler than picking oblivious idiots off 1 by 1, but in this game, probably about 5-10% of my kills were the sneaky kind, and the rest were cover-based headshots of instantly by-default alerted enemies.

Also the enemy counter snipers. God, they are annoying. The only way to spot them is by taking a bullet from them, and then scope out the location the shot came from.

Myself from 2007 would have never conceived that someone, especially Yahtzee, would find relief from World War II games. I remember those things were such a curse on gaming, I refused to play a Call of Duty game after the first one. Times have certainly changed...

That Scotty reference was kind of topical. They just shot his ashes and the ashes of about 200 other people into space yesterday from Cape Canaveral aboard the new SpaceX rocket. I'm sure he'll be up there beaming us all up in due time.

Yeah... I think you should probably get that looked at.

canadamus_prime:

trollpwner:

canadamus_prime:
You jerk off to Disney Princesses?

Frankly, who doesn't? Rule 34, my friend, it's a horrific, disgusting and wrong wonderful thing that every human who doesn't have a one single shred of dignity and deserves to die should see.

Um... well I don't.

You've never lived.

No mention of the testicles? He just keeps surprising, even after all this time.

I must say after seeing some gameplay videos of the game, the x-ray bullet penetration view invokes the same disgust that Mortal Kombat (whatever the newest number is) does with its x-ray views of bone breaking and internal damage. I'm so used to thinking that shooting an enemy in a game just spawns blood spatters and reduces hitpoints.

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