Zero Punctuation: Age of Conan

 Pages PREV 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 NEXT
 

I had a feeling you were going to review this.
But i'm still waiting for a Nimja Gaiden 2 review.

Best review in a while and I find it adoreable that Yahtzee is finaly coming to terms that he doesn't just think WoW is a good game, he actualy seems to like it.

The midsomer murders thing was brilliant.

hehehe I liked the midsomer murders reference, the TV equivalent of of an MMO, boring, repetitive and making what 2 hours of your life back.

David_Cat:

Aries_Split:

David_Cat:

Spinwhiz:

David_Cat:
This is going to rock! As usual

Are you telling me you made this post even before you watched it?

Yes, that is why I said "This is GOING to rock" rather that "This DOES rock"

Which is why you are now going to be banned. Good bye!

Well, if one gets banned on these forums for predicting that a feature is Going To Rock, then by all means ban me.

Well, predicting that ZP is going to rock is like predicting the sun will set today.

Couldn't agree with him more. Age of Conan= Another boring MMORPG with the same fetch missions and design flaws.

Spinwhiz:

David_Cat:

Aries_Split:

David_Cat:

Spinwhiz:

David_Cat:
This is going to rock! As usual

Are you telling me you made this post even before you watched it?

Yes, that is why I said "This is GOING to rock" rather that "This DOES rock"

Which is why you are now going to be banned. Good bye!

Well, if one gets banned on these forums for predicting that a feature is Going To Rock, then by all means ban me.

Well, predicting that ZP is going to rock is like predicting the sun will set today.

Yes, but banning someone for stating the obvious sounds very Fascist.

didnt like the review... in retrospective this is loosing it... i mean the touch... didnt laft ... yes it got the info i needed to know about the game ... maybe its just me... and i miss the intro and end songs...

Aries_Split:
Yahtzees been seeming not himself lately. Like in the MGS4 series, he criticized redundant stories. HIM! The creator of the Chzo series!

Not to spark off that debate, but he criticised MGS' story for slowing down the game. The Chzo series never had any delusions about being action packed or stuffed full of gameplay.

David_Cat:

Spinwhiz:

David_Cat:

Aries_Split:

David_Cat:

Spinwhiz:

David_Cat:
This is going to rock! As usual

Are you telling me you made this post even before you watched it?

Yes, that is why I said "This is GOING to rock" rather that "This DOES rock"

Which is why you are now going to be banned. Good bye!

Well, if one gets banned on these forums for predicting that a feature is Going To Rock, then by all means ban me.

Well, predicting that ZP is going to rock is like predicting the sun will set today.

Yes, but banning someone for stating the obvious sounds very Fascist.

Try reading around the escapist first.

David_Cat:

Spinwhiz:

David_Cat:

Aries_Split:

David_Cat:

Spinwhiz:

David_Cat:
This is going to rock! As usual

Are you telling me you made this post even before you watched it?

Yes, that is why I said "This is GOING to rock" rather that "This DOES rock"

Which is why you are now going to be banned. Good bye!

Well, if one gets banned on these forums for predicting that a feature is Going To Rock, then by all means ban me.

Well, predicting that ZP is going to rock is like predicting the sun will set today.

Yes, but banning someone for stating the obvious sounds very Fascist.

Agreed. At least he didn't post then edit it just to be guaranteed a comment box on the first page like all the other morons.

As soon as AoC releases a free 10-day trial I'm all over an all-nude server. :D

Seriously, I think the entire marketing to AoC is right there in the banners, "Titty titty titty titty SWORDS titty."

Anyway, I love the little naked sprite running around with "Jugs" written on her chest. XD

If Gamespot has taught me anything it's that Yahtzee will be fired by the escapist for not licking Age of Conan's balls.

Any chance of getting Yahtzee in a loincloth? Maybe there could be a Yahtzee calender? Yahtzee wearing nothing but his hat and a cleverly placed Guitar Hero guitar, Yahtzee wearing nothing but his hat and a cleverly placed DS, Yahtzee wearing nothing but his hat and a cleverly placed my face, Yahtzee wearing nothing but his hat and a cleverly placed... well you get the idea. Oh wait! Yahtzee wearing nothing but his hat and it's cleverly placed.

I'm not joking. I'm one of those guys who watches this with his boyfriend but only because I very publicly want to cleft Yahtzee in two with my "plot important MacGuffin".

Anyway, classic base-line Zero Punctuation.

Gah...I had a nice wall of text there and then it 404's me.

Ah well.

Here's a review of the review.

Yahtzee, that charismatic stallion seems to have incontinence at the moment. Whilst being upgraded to the big time, all of that rich food seems to make him deliver more and more bile everytime; and some of it is splattering on our clothes.
Comparing MMO's to WoW seems to be missing the point somewhat. It's like comparing Tim Henman to John McEnroe. We all know who'd win, but we want to know the good points. And there were better, faster and prettier tennis players way before the ball was in.

Whilst running through his usual gobbets thrown at the walls a la Family Guy, there's a picture emerging that perhaps he just doesn't like reviewing games. He certainly is foregoing the review more to making Angry Jokes, and to help with this, he's actually going out there to make people angry. What exactly did you THINK would happen with a naked necromancer? People would applaud you for your roleplaying skills?

Anyway, I'd rate it good but lacking. Sort of like McCain Micro Chips. It smells ok and it sates me, but it's nothing compared to the greasy goodness of newspaper wrapped slabs of potato served by a woman in uniform.

And you still have that stupid steenkeng intro/outro.

Another Boris Vallejo reference!

sweet, columbo in a mmorpg!

Sorry if this has been posted before, but why does Yahtzee say that he's 'fat' at the end of his review? He always made jokes about being undernourished and scrawny back in his Fully Ramblomatic days.... Ehh, maybe I'm looking too much into this, though it is rather intriguing.

Oh, and AWESOME review, as expected. He might do an E3 one next week (you guys really expected him to do it this week?! [the poor guy needs time to rest, you know]), but he already did a little podcast on it; he mostly talked about the new Prince of Persia game, as well as his 'misanthropic cynicism', for those of you who are too lazy to check for yourselves.

EDIT: Oh, and what the hell, people? I'm not trying to flame anybody, but I wouldn't exactly call it unprecedented to ask you all what the fuck you're talking about when you bash on the new theme. Sure, the old ones were no-doubt clevar in their relevancy, but this is YAHTZEE - this is something that was pretty much created by the man himself. How can you not appreciate that?

Also, who in their sane mind doesn't like classic rock with a heavy dose of squealy guitars?

Noooooo! Please don't kill wombats!

Very nice. I still don't like the new beginnings and ends but overall it's still a jolly good time.

Stupendous! Fantastic! Another superlative!

Also *whispers*, yes that music is growing on me. In the same way that tumors do, but growing nonetheless.

I miss Yahtzee's music choices. He used to pick songs for the beginning and end of the review that fit the game, or his opinion of it. I guess you can only do it so many times before it gets difficult to find good songs.

David_Cat:
Well, if one gets banned on these forums for predicting that a feature is Going To Rock, then by all means ban me.

Granted.

From here on, I will be pronouncing "niche" like "quiche" as Yahtzee did in this review.

He's absolutely right, however that every MMORPG should strive to be like WoW. 10 million people can't be wrong. They can be dumb, but they can't be wrong. It's a good business model, really.

Another spot-on review - finally getting used to the music. And hooray for more gay jokes, as well as the shout-out to a pure RPG like Baldur's Gate.

Best moment: the notice about the exclamation points over people's heads and the clear reference to Solid Snake. I am still annoyed about that loud noise that popped up in Metal Gear Solid every time someone saw you, second to my annoyance about Metal Gear's inability to kill off any of their main characters - the same reason I avoid the X-Men comics.

Still not quite understanding the ban fest that is going on but... This was quite humorous since I actually did play Age of Conan but never got past level 20...or level 17 for that matter before I gave up due to the instancing and boring grind fest that is every MMO. >_<

Ya know, I used to roll over laughing at these but now I seem to only smile and nod admittingly at the truth of these. Interesting how stuff like that happens. At least you aren't going to make a webcomic about miscarriages eh? =P

jeh not bad i liked the solid snake joke.

something_clevar:
Sorry if this has been posted before, but why does Yahtzee say that he's 'fat' at the end of his review? He always made jokes about being undernourished and scrawny back in his Fully Ramblomatic days.... Ehh, maybe I'm looking too much into this, though it is rather intriguing.

He's probably won the fight against the hateful little angel who pops up on his shoulder to talk him out of buying an Cornetto every time he walks past the corner store (see: Haze review for clarification).

Good luck on that all nude server!

This review seemed not quite unpredictably funny, still good though and even points out some things reviews didn't like to mention, like loot not really impacting gameplay much.

excellent episode, as usual

lol. loved that ending :P

Ahh, hahaha - nice reference

LesIsMore:

something_clevar:
Sorry if this has been posted before, but why does Yahtzee say that he's 'fat' at the end of his review? He always made jokes about being undernourished and scrawny back in his Fully Ramblomatic days.... Ehh, maybe I'm looking too much into this, though it is rather intriguing.

He's probably won the fight against the hateful little angel who pops up on his shoulder to talk him out of buying an ice cream cone every time he walks past the corner store (see: Haze review for clarification).

Ahh, hahaha, nice reference thar! But come on now, do you really think I'd be much of a fan if I had to go consult the old reviews because I missed out on a reference? Pffft...

EDIT: Uh, does anybody mind me asking why the hell there are, like, five overly-harsh bans on the first page? Does this happen very often? I'm new here....

Yeah, MMOs have a big problem in that they are all mindless grind-festivals. It's a bit tragic that the game developers still do not try to get one step further and introduce intelligence into those games. Granted it's a hard task, especially if you intend to make money with it in the long run, but I've seen no MMO right now which managed to hook me for longer than at most a couple of weeks.

That said the review has been good and funny. Still the opening is annoying but there's nothing one can do about it. At last with the new ( crappy ) video streaming soft they use you can not rewind to the very beginning only like up to 10 seconds or something like this more or less skipping the annoying introduction :P

good review, pretty funny. dont play mmorpgs myself, find them so boring and a huge waste of time. aoc looks neat, i wouldn't mind a single player game like aoc.

 Pages PREV 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 NEXT

Reply to Thread

Log in or Register to Comment
Have an account? Login below:
With Facebook:Login With Facebook
or
Username:  
Password:  
  
Not registered? To sign up for an account with The Escapist:
Register With Facebook
Register With Facebook
or
Register for a free account here