Mall Fight - Back To Basics (Open)

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I respawn on the back of the cart, and pick up Sir Head. "You look familiar... Have I met you before?"

I yelp in fear and do some specifically NOT sweet-ass, or ninja-style, moves and buck Zeph, Mr Body and myself off the cart.
I land in a hat shop, and decide to declare myself Baron von Hattington.

I grab one of those beer helmets, and headbutt Twibly.

I resist getting lamped by wearing a trilby.
Trilbyception.

I respawn, and walk over to Eric. "A gun that shoots killer bees eh?" I say, "Well I counter with *Drematic Reveal* the CANDY CORN HANDGUN!
image

I gather up many hats and get back on the cart, then drive dangerously around.

I respawn on top of the cake crushing it. In a blind fit of rage I dive into the shadows and bite out Trilby's jugular vein.

I find a vending machine and smash it grabbing to root beers and a 'Sir Fizzy'z Absurdly Fizzy Drink in a Can'... I stick the two root beers into the beer helmet, and start to shake the third. Eventually the pop was about to burst and I walk over to the nearest person and offer it to someone.

I drive violently at Zeph's face (and the rest of his body too).

I throw the pop can at the cart, hopping the little knock will make the pop can explode.

The can doesn't explode, but it bounces up and hits me in the face. I swerve and bump into Zeph side-on. "You got my trilbies wet. FOR THAT, YOU MUST DIE!" I say, then I pounce on Zeph, grab a can of soda and turn it into...

club soda.

TrilbyWill:
The can doesn't explode, but it bounces up and hits me in the face. I swerve and bump into Zeph side-on. "You got my trilbies wet. FOR THAT, YOU MUST DIE!" I say, then I pounce on Zeph, grab a can of soda and turn it into...

club soda.

I respawn in a music store next to a drum set.

"AH! CLUB SODA! MY ONE WEAKNESS!!" I scream.

I make a sad face. "WHY WOULD YOU EAT MY HAT!" I yell, then give Bryghtside a Glasgow Grin with a breadknife.

"Trilby! Look over there!" I point in a random direction. "A DISTRACTION!!"

Using a piece of wiring like a vine, I swing along and grab SirBryghtside. "Never fear, I will save you!" I say, before he slips out of my hands and into the broken glass store.
"..."
"Well shit"

I tackle Zep into a tank of acid inside the acid store.

I watch as a guy named Zap Brannigan get attacked by Eric. "Well that was odd."

"Trilby? Can you get off me now?"

"ZEP! I SAID ZEP!" (Me)

I get my baseball bat and hammer the can into Joe's forehead.

Realizing that Eric had infact hit Zep instead of Zap, I died instantly to the acid. "AH!! I must have had an ACID trip!?"

Trilby kills an innocent stickman, who was looking at buying some ribs from a local butcher.

"Wankah!" I say, doing my best impression of the Sniper from TF2.
I decide to write 'Zerg' on my chest and rush Eric.

Due to the pendulum effect, I swing back, hitting Eric, and causing Trilby to run into a wall.

I rub my nose and add 'made me run into a wall' to my List of Vengeance.
"KNIFE!" I yell, rushing him with my bat and knife.

As I swing back, I jump off the rope, tackling Trilby off the baclony.

As I fall I do this:
image
image

I respawn with Mjolnir.

"Is this a conventional weapon?" (Me)

I land next to Eric. "No it is not!" I say, before the hammer explodes, killing both of us.

Nothing to see here >.>

I respawn and grab some bubble soup and a large bubble machine, and start to fill the mall with zillions of bubbles.

"MY EYES, THEY BURN!" I cry, respawning in the soapy mass of bubbles.

I approach Zeph under cover of daylight, and get distracted by the bubbles.
I officially declare them
image

I belive the word is I have returned

I see demonjazz.
"IT BEGINS!!!"

yes it does (gets stilleto out of pocket)lets dance

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