Zero Punctuation: Top 5 of 2011

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1st thought: There we go guys Both BF3 and MW3 got worst game by YZ. You can all stop the "my game is better and you suck" rant. And for goodness sakes clean up your room! All these bodies you have yet to sacrifice to the MW or BF gods is making the whole house stink!

2nd thought: When did YZ review Bastion?

BrownGaijin:
1st thought: There we go guys Both BF3 and MW3 got worst game by YZ. You can all stop the "my game is better and you suck" rant. And for goodness sakes clean up your room! All these bodies you have yet to sacrifice to the MW or BF gods is making the whole house stink!

2nd thought: When did YZ review Bastion?

He did a joint review of it with From Dust a few months back.

Vault101:

Gorilla Gunk:
This is why I can never take Yahtzee seriously as a game critic despite the fact that I love his "reviews" and look forward to them every week.

I mean, BF3 and MW3 are your worse games of the year? Worse than Mindjack, DNF, and the new Red Faction that effectively killed it's franchise? Not to mention the other games you reviewed and hated like Brink and Call of Juarez: The Cartel? Really? I mean I'm not the biggest fan of those games (Black Ops > MW3, KZ3 > BF3) but it just comes across as him making a rather tone-deaf statement than saying they're really that bad. Like a stuffy movie critic naming a big-budget 3D movie as their worse film of the year because it's in 3D.

To me Yahtzee is no different then a comedian riffing on whatever movie he just saw. Sure it's funny and he brings up a few decent points, but are you really suppose to take his opinion seriously? No, you're not, and if you do you're an idiot.

what is it with people and telling yahtzee his opinions are wrong?

it sounds like your essentially saying "yeah but you should have chosen THEASE games because everyone else did and you want to fit in right?"..... (like the those effing skyrim fanboys)

also I get the feeling he trashed a game you liked, it doesnt take a genious to see the come vailid arguemnts he puts forward

I fail to see how he could give a valid opinion on either MW3 or BF3, seeing as how he avoids multiplayer like the plague... and it's the central focus of those 2 games.

It's like asking someone who's lactose intolerant to give their opinion on whole milk vs 2%. Yea, they have an opinion I'm sure. But how much is it worth really?

Yahtzee hates FPS's. We know this, we get it. At this point I'm tired of hearing him regurgitate the same shit review he gives every single one. It's getting to be as unoriginal as the very games he accuses of the crime. If he's going to review games that are outside of his field of interest, enlighten me as to why I should give a fuck what he has to say? Do you review games in genre's you hate, then expect your word to be law? I should hope not.

The video was good for a laugh, but I'll judge a game's value for myself, thanks.

Aeonknight:

Vault101:

Gorilla Gunk:
This is why I can never take Yahtzee seriously as a game critic despite the fact that I love his "reviews" and look forward to them every week.

I mean, BF3 and MW3 are your worse games of the year? Worse than Mindjack, DNF, and the new Red Faction that effectively killed it's franchise? Not to mention the other games you reviewed and hated like Brink and Call of Juarez: The Cartel? Really? I mean I'm not the biggest fan of those games (Black Ops > MW3, KZ3 > BF3) but it just comes across as him making a rather tone-deaf statement than saying they're really that bad. Like a stuffy movie critic naming a big-budget 3D movie as their worse film of the year because it's in 3D.

To me Yahtzee is no different then a comedian riffing on whatever movie he just saw. Sure it's funny and he brings up a few decent points, but are you really suppose to take his opinion seriously? No, you're not, and if you do you're an idiot.

what is it with people and telling yahtzee his opinions are wrong?

it sounds like your essentially saying "yeah but you should have chosen THEASE games because everyone else did and you want to fit in right?"..... (like the those effing skyrim fanboys)

also I get the feeling he trashed a game you liked, it doesnt take a genious to see the come vailid arguemnts he puts forward

I fail to see how he could give a valid opinion on either MW3 or BF3, seeing as how he avoids multiplayer like the plague... and it's the central focus of those 2 games.

It's like asking someone who's lactose intolerant to give their opinion on whole milk vs 2%. Yea, they have an opinion I'm sure. But how much is it worth really?

Yahtzee hates FPS's. We know this, we get it. At this point I'm tired of hearing him regurgitate the same shit review he gives every single one. It's getting to be as unoriginal as the very games he accuses of the crime. If he's going to review games that are outside of his field of interest, enlighten me as to why I should give a fuck what he has to say? Do you review games in genre's you hate, then expect your word to be law? I should hope not.

The video was good for a laugh, but I'll judge a game's value for myself, thanks.

Yahtzee doesnt hate FPS's (again doesnt take a genious to figure that out) he hates COD style "realistic" bland multiplayer focused FPS's....(which I hope your not implying represts everything in the FPS genre)

and I dont know if you were listening "its not like thease games were badly made or fail at what they set out to do" he hates what they REPRESENT (and its funny to hear him rip them apart) and while I bought and played (and enjoyed for a very short time) BF3 I understand what he means

its kind of like me and Skyrim...skrim shits me to no end, especially because of all the drooling adiration it gets..BUT I can give credit for what is represts (as jim said) going against all those annoying trends..and for that reason alone I'm glad it exists

and so what if his "opinion isnt vaild" on those games...go to ANY OTHER site and youll probably get 5 star reveiws if thats what you really need to affirm your liking for them, why do you get your underware in a twist over one guy reveiwing them because its funny? why dont you get your undies in a twst over the MANY people out there on the interent who complain about "brown shooters"

Looking back at all the other Top 5 (or 10) lists I've seen - as in those from the Escapist and Blistered Thumbs - I'd say the "face-pissing puppy" analogy makes sense. Because after all, who doesn't love puppies? They're cute, playful, and make you feel important, just like Skyrim (except that Skyrim is beautiful instead of cute, but you get the point). Sure, they make messes, but even the worst "carpet stains" can be cleaned out.

For context, 3 out of 6 main Escapist team members and 2 out of 3 Blistered Thumbs reviewers had Skyrim AS NUMBER ONE. However, the other reviewers did not, probably to give space for Batman and such.

I'm surprised no mention of Deus Ex (in the good) Arkham city (same) or Saints Row 3 (in the bad).

Don't really see the point of the number one spot though, he has always stated that he doesn't like either series in the current gen,mainly due to multiplayer. Just comes across as bashing them purely because everyone else does.

I will always say, both MW and Battlefield are not the best thing in gaming by far, but that doesn't mean they don't have a right to exist. I enjoy the singleplayer of both in the same way I would an old Schwarzenegger or Stallone movie, OTT action, but with the added bonus of dropping an airstrike on your friends.

Vault101:

Aeonknight:

Vault101:

what is it with people and telling yahtzee his opinions are wrong?

it sounds like your essentially saying "yeah but you should have chosen THEASE games because everyone else did and you want to fit in right?"..... (like the those effing skyrim fanboys)

also I get the feeling he trashed a game you liked, it doesnt take a genious to see the come vailid arguemnts he puts forward

I fail to see how he could give a valid opinion on either MW3 or BF3, seeing as how he avoids multiplayer like the plague... and it's the central focus of those 2 games.

It's like asking someone who's lactose intolerant to give their opinion on whole milk vs 2%. Yea, they have an opinion I'm sure. But how much is it worth really?

Yahtzee hates FPS's. We know this, we get it. At this point I'm tired of hearing him regurgitate the same shit review he gives every single one. It's getting to be as unoriginal as the very games he accuses of the crime. If he's going to review games that are outside of his field of interest, enlighten me as to why I should give a fuck what he has to say? Do you review games in genre's you hate, then expect your word to be law? I should hope not.

The video was good for a laugh, but I'll judge a game's value for myself, thanks.

Yahtzee doesnt hate FPS's (again doesnt take a genious to figure that out) he hates COD style "realistic" bland multiplayer focused FPS's....(which I hope your not implying represts everything in the FPS genre)

and I dont know if you were listening "its not like thease games were badly made or fail at what they set out to do" he hates what they REPRESENT (and its funny to hear him rip them apart) and while I bought and played (and enjoyed for a very short time) BF3 I understand what he means

its kind of like me and Skyrim...skrim shits me to no end, especially because of all the drooling adiration it gets..BUT I can give credit for what is represts (as jim said) going against all those annoying trends..and for that reason alone I'm glad it exists

and so what if his "opinion isnt vaild" on those games...go to ANY OTHER site and youll probably get 5 star reveiws if thats what you really need to affirm your liking for them, why do you get your underware in a twist over one guy reveiwing them because its funny? why dont you get your undies in a twst over the MANY people out there on the interent who complain about "brown shooters"

Doesn't like FPS's you say? I'll take that bet.
He didn't like Bulletstorm, Killzone 3, Brink, DNF, Red Faction, Dead Island, Resistance 3, Hard Reset, Rage, BF3, MW3, Gears 3.
Games he did like this year? Crysis 2, Fear 3 (sort of), Portal 2, Serious Sam 3.

Notice the ratio of like to dislike. To be fair, alot of those were indeed terrible. But even the ones that got it right within their genre of "bland military shooter" got a severe thrashing from him.

Also, you kinda failed to address my earlier point. If Yahtzee is giving reviews on games that aren't his cup of tea, "bland realistic military based multiplayer focused shooters" as you call them, then why should I care? It's not that I think he's wrong (hated MW3 myself actually. Also opinions can't be wrong OR right) or that my enjoyment of a game needs to be reinforced by someone over the internet, it's that when I can guess what's going to come out of his mouth before he even says it, that makes for a cliche, predictable, boring review. But that won't stop his fanboys from parroting everything he says as fact I'm sure...

As for hating those games based on what they represent, about the only one I could see him having a leg to stand on would be MW3. It is quite literally the rehash all the haters say it is. And this is coming from a fan of the series...
Gears 3? BF3? they weren't the direct cash grab sequels that MW3 was. Sure the companies that own them have made some absolute prick decisions, but rather than let game politics sway my opinion on the game, how about I let the game itself do that instead?

Aeonknight:
Yahtzee hates FPS's. We know this, we get it.

Yahtzee on:

Half-Life series: A beacon of excellent design philosophy.
Team Fortress 2: A multiplayer experience matched only by competitive breast massage.
Painkiller: Fucking awesome!
COD4: Deserves the praise it gets.
Resistance 3: Isn't bad at all.
System Shock 2: Brilliant.
Serious Sam 3: This retro style holds appeal for me.
Crysis 2: Definitely above whatever fetid set of values passes for "average" these days.
Fallout 3: Yeah, it's pretty good.
Metroid Prime: A good console FPS.
Bulletstorm: ...everything you need to stave off your workplace shooting rampage for another few grim, torturous days.
Modern Warefare 2: From a purely mechanical standpoint, Modern Warfare 2 is absolutely perfect.
S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Clear Sky: ...weirdly compelling....quite an immersive game once you adjust for the steep difficulty curve.
Bioshock: Incredibly good-looking, brilliantly written, masterfully atmospheric, and resoundingly imaginative...probably one of the best games of the year.

erttheking:
Call of Duty and Battlefield were worse than Duke Nukem Forever...I think Yahtzee is letting his hatred of military shooters get the better of him.

Maybe their campaigns were, or at least Battlefield 3's. That was pretty average. However if Yachtzee's allowed to say that a game can be subjectively judged on one small facet of the overall package then I can do the same.

Battlefield 3's multiplayer is amazing. It's so epic my friends and I have actually inadvertently re-enacted set pieces from the various Modern Warfare campaigns. Sniping out of a chopper as jets run airstrikes, while dodging enemy anti air fire? Done that. Guiding a heavily outnumbered squad as they infiltrated the enemy position from an aerial vehicle, using thermal vision to help get the job done? Done that. Intense urban firefights as helicopter parts fall from the sky? Done that. Knifing an enemy before jumping off a cliff? Done that. Breached a building with C4 and killing the enemies inside? Done that.

I tell you as soon as I get a decent graphics card I'm recording this crap.

Also MW3's multiplayer is good if you're into ADD hyperactive quickscope stuff.

Ergo by Yachtzee's rule both games are good and BF3 is in fact GOTY (in my opinion)

Joccaren:
Well, why did it deserve to get any higher? It wasn't great by any means, and after 10 minutes I had experienced everything it had to offer. There is no real reason for re-playability, and several semi-game-breaking bugs. The world was large and open, but felt dead, and after the first hour the game stopped being fun. I'd imagine Yahtzee had the same experience as I, and kept pushing on to see if it got more fun, but just found more of the same. The best thing Skyrim did was the grey choice between Stormcloaks and Imperials. In Yahtzee's own words [Though when reviewing a different title] "Everything it's done has been done before - and better". I'm surprised it even made it to five, and I'll agree with Yahtzee it was probably peer pressure. I don't get at all what everyone finds so great about it, except Jim Sterling's ideas on how the game proves the industry wrong.

You're really emphasizing the 10 minutes thing, aren't you? I'm not going to tell you that your opinion is wrong, but when you state that a game most people say is great "wasn't great by any means" as fact, you're expecting an argument. So I'll give you one.

The game has no replayability and you experienced everything in it in 10 minutes? The simple fact that people play the game for hundreds of hours completely destroys your ability to say that. Maybe it had no replayability for you, but it definitely has replayability. And 10 minutes? The game isn't just dungeons, you know. There's a huge amount of interest in just wondering around and stumbling on things, like a lighthouse full of bodies that starts an unexpected quest to find their murderer or a sunken ship or a shrine to a dark god who commands you to go solve their problems. Not to mention all the side quest-lines with their own plots, characters, tones, and several hours of gameplay. Then there are numerous playstyles which, due to the leveling system, become more defined and distinct as you go along. Archery or magic in the first ten minutes is definitely not archery or magic 10 or 20 or 50 hours in. There's a lot to do in Skyrim and there's a lot of variety in doing it.

TLDR: You didn't experience everything in Skyrim in 10 minutes, you experienced 10 minutes of Skyrim in 10 minutes. If you didn't like it it's fine that you quit(not like you need anyone's approval anyway), but people aren't playing it for 100s of hours because it's the same ten minutes over and over. That's just false.

Yahtz you're my hero :D and why CS never got a response like MW or BF? Because back in those days, 12yr olds couldn't get their hands on these games. Nor did the francise milk the shit out of us. Lastly, mods. Imo anyways...

I can't agree with Dead Island or BF3...

Dead Island is great, boo freakin-hoo it turned out to be a game rather than a marketting video. Personally I think it's the best zombie game since RE4, people should give it a try rather than listening to regurgitated reviewer opinion - you won't know until you've put a sledgehammer through your first zombie skull.

BF3 is currently standing on Red Rivers balls, asking it who the fuck it thinks it is. I tried Red River, and thought it was a complex mish mash of realistic shooter and rectal exam. What exactly is a realistic shooter anyway?, Red River is more complicated, that is all. BF3 is by and large, my ideal online FPS. There is nothing more satisfying than getting a headshot from 300 yards because that requires a degree of skill, nothing makes me happier than rigging a tank with C4, then standing back and watching the carnage. Maybe the problem some people have with BF3 is that you have to work at it, you have to earn your stripes and improve your kit, and consider team play the whole time. If you have trouble getting to the action, here's a thought... why not spawn near the action, or take a vehicle, or point your control stick thingy at the red diamond and press the other stick thingy forward. People really want a realistic shooter when they can't cope with being more than 100 yards from someone to shoot at, give me a break!.

Now that 2011 is over with, can we all agree on the following...

1. Dead Islands trailer was great, but some people didn't like the game.
2. Battlefield3's single player campaign is not very good.
3. Skyrim has some glitches. I know, this one time a dragon flew backwards, the horror.
4. DNF sucked, and took a long long time to make.

And can we shut up about it now. We have to make the most of the awesome games we got in 2011, because I don't think 2012 has much to offer us.

Freaky Lou:

Aeonknight:
Yahtzee hates FPS's. We know this, we get it.

Yahtzee on:

Half-Life series: A beacon of excellent design philosophy.
Team Fortress 2: A multiplayer experience matched only by competitive breast massage.
Painkiller: Fucking awesome!
COD4: Deserves the praise it gets.
Resistance 3: Isn't bad at all.
System Shock 2: Brilliant.
Serious Sam 3: This retro style holds appeal for me.
Crysis 2: Definitely above whatever fetid set of values passes for "average" these days.
Fallout 3: Yeah, it's pretty good.
Metroid Prime: A good console FPS.
Bulletstorm: ...everything you need to stave off your workplace shooting rampage for another few grim, torturous days.
Modern Warefare 2: From a purely mechanical standpoint, Modern Warfare 2 is absolutely perfect.
S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Clear Sky: ...weirdly compelling....quite an immersive game once you adjust for the steep difficulty curve.
Bioshock: Incredibly good-looking, brilliantly written, masterfully atmospheric, and resoundingly imaginative...probably one of the best games of the year.

Ok, so you want to bring up reviews he made years ago as evidence to contradict my assumption. "I didn't say he always hated them, must be a recent development." There, satisfied?

Refer to my list above for this year alone. I could go looking into prior years for FPS games he disliked, but I already wasted enough time on the post above, I'm not about go digging through every single review he's ever done to find more evidence to support my notion about him. Feel free to consider this a "raising the white flag" on my part.

sigh...

I remember when ZP used to make objective reviews and it's end of the year lists made a concerted effort to genuinely list the best and worst games of the year....

I still watch because Yahtzee is entertaining but man, he used to be entertaining AND deliver honest reviews not just hate on popular stuff to wind up the fanboys and set out to trash every game even if he likse it because 'its funnier'. Personally I think the one of the best reviews ever seen here was portal 1, a game Yahtzee heaped unashamed buckets of love upon and it was STILL funny.

1. Ok you dont like modern shooters, good for you, you dont like multiplayer, fine thats your personal taste but then why bother reviewing the likes of BF3 at all? A game that is by all accounts a mutlipalyer game that only even has a single player game tacked on 'because MW3 has that too'. Honestly if I only played the single player part of it I would have thought it was awful too. But the thing is if I hated mutliplayer FPS play I wouldn't buy a BF game and I sure as hell wouldn't review one. Even STILL though. Can you really truly and honestly say it's single player was WORSE than Duke Nukem forever? Really? REALLY? I've played both BF3 and DNF. BF3's single player campaign was a pile of arse but the people responsilbe for DNF should be put on trial at the Hague.... My issue here to be clear isnt that you dislike the game. Thats fine, my issue is this: If you hate modern shooters and multiplayer so much why bother reviewing a genre you hate, I don't see a review for Forza 4 (which is fine because you by all accounts hate driving games so it would be a waste of effort (and yes I know, Driver SF, but thats not really a 'driving game' imo as much as it is a story driven adventure involving cars ).

2. Dead Island. Ok it had it's flaws (personally I quite liked the game though it had about as much to do with the trailer as something and some other totally unrelated thing (its early and I've not had my morning bucket of caffeine yet, gimme a break ;)) but surely there were games you must have despised more? What about Call of Juarez? Sure that deserves a spot in the 5 biggest turds?

Thats pretty much it, the 5 games you liked I have no beef with whatsoever as always its just the hating on stuff seemingly just to spite folks when theres ACTUAL crap games that could be hated on that winds me up, you have all that wonderful hatred and bile and your wasting it on stuff that isnt ACTUALLY that bad rather than the stuff that really DESERVES a roasting...

The list was pretty spot on,both in best and also in the worst games section.

Had a few good laughs so my day is pretty much complete.

Thanks again Yahtzee!

Nice to see Portal 2 get a number one nod. I mean it has a couple but not as many as when it came out which is understandable of course.

And as to the CoD/BF3 thing - yep, fair call. I haven't played the latest CoD, I didn't want to go back on my word to let the franchise ferment in peace, but I enjoyed and still enjoy BF3's multiplayer. And you know what I even enjoyed the single player... some of it... when you weren't lead along or pushed around by AI or waiting for your team to 'stack up'. It looked really pretty and felt intense at times. That's something I suppose.

BUT

I really dislike everything both of them represent. Whether it was that shamefully pathetic pissing contest that got everyone riled up over which is superior or the last squeak of air from a deflated balloon that represented the so-called ultimate(s)in modern warfare gaming... talk about anti-climactic.

Look, modern warfare shooters are the easy sell, it's no wonder no real imagination and effort is being put in. I say ignore the genre for a few years. Then, maybe, when a modern warfare shooter is something different and worth putting real effort in to make it good because developers won't just get another crack at it next year, maybe then the unrelenting over-hyped mediocrity will end. I'm not holding my breath though, just my wallet.

Aeonknight:

He didn't like Bulletstorm, Killzone 3, Brink, DNF, Red Faction, Dead Island,, Rage, BF3, MW3, Gears 3.
Games he did like this year? Crysis 2, Fear 3 (sort of), Portal 2, Serious Sam 3, Resistance 3, Hard Reset.

Fixed. Seems pretty even to me. And as someone who loves FPS I must say: It is about the same list as mine when it comes down to good FPS released this year.

I like a lot of what he said except for the bit about Battlefield 3, no matter what that game is amazing for the multiplayer sandbox it offers up. Not sure about his game of the year either, actually I was shocked to hear my game of the year not mentioned at all: Deus Ex. Oh well, whatever, I guess Driver must be something mind-blowing that I missed...

I'm going to be that idiot that ducks just as the capping beggins

I'm honestly surprised to see a game such as Driver SA so high on the list. Not that I have played it. Then again I guess it just shows how fair Yahtzee can be, awarding such a high place to a game genre he wouldn't normally play.

Putting Skyrim as number 5 must be his way of staying within the parameters of the pretentious game journalist club and still pleasing the slavering Skyrim fans (me included.)

A refreshing list including some genuine shockers, for that you have my respect. Bravo my man, bravo.

Gorilla Gunk:
This is why I can never take Yahtzee seriously as a game critic despite the fact that I love his "reviews" and look forward to them every week.

I mean, BF3 and MW3 are your worse games of the year? Worse than Mindjack, DNF, and the new Red Faction that effectively killed it's franchise? Not to mention the other games you reviewed and hated like Brink and Call of Juarez: The Cartel? Really? I mean I'm not the biggest fan of those games (Black Ops > MW3, KZ3 > BF3) but it just comes across as him making a rather tone-deaf statement than saying they're really that bad. Like a stuffy movie critic naming a big-budget 3D movie as their worse film of the year because it's in 3D.

To me Yahtzee is no different then a comedian riffing on whatever movie he just saw. Sure it's funny and he brings up a few decent points, but are you really suppose to take his opinion seriously? No, you're not, and if you do you're an idiot.

He outright says he put them there because of what they stand for. Which I think is fair enough. and it isn't like a movie critic complaining about 3d, it would be more like if everyone still used VHS and they were complaining about the big budget titles holding us back by releasing the same film every year in a shitty format even though DVD and blu-ray is readily available to do amazing things with.

For the record, I think CoD multiplayer is amazing fun, and although I haven't played battlefield for some time, I still really enjoyed the ones I have played.

P.S. Why should we not take his opinion seriously? It's an opinion, the stuff reviews are made of. No different to any other reviewers.

Gorilla Gunk:
I know it's his list and I understand he doesn't think MW3 or BF3 are bad gameplay wise. Still doesn't make it any less of a stupid move. All he's doing is standing on a pedestal, proselytizing and trying to make a big statement (Still not sure exactly what he means by "what they represent"). I was expecting him to really dig into another bad game like he did with Kane & Lynch 2 but instead he sat me down and tried me a lecture and expects me to nod and take him seriously. It was lame and not very funny or entertaining. This is definitely one his weaker videos.

What they represent is samey multiplayer-only churned-out year after year money grabs which completely stagnate the FPS genre by completely dominating it and making every other company try to emulate them. I think that is more than reason enough to make them worst game of the year.

FaceFaceFace:

Joccaren:
Well, why did it deserve to get any higher? It wasn't great by any means, and after 10 minutes I had experienced everything it had to offer. There is no real reason for re-playability, and several semi-game-breaking bugs. The world was large and open, but felt dead, and after the first hour the game stopped being fun. I'd imagine Yahtzee had the same experience as I, and kept pushing on to see if it got more fun, but just found more of the same. The best thing Skyrim did was the grey choice between Stormcloaks and Imperials. In Yahtzee's own words [Though when reviewing a different title] "Everything it's done has been done before - and better". I'm surprised it even made it to five, and I'll agree with Yahtzee it was probably peer pressure. I don't get at all what everyone finds so great about it, except Jim Sterling's ideas on how the game proves the industry wrong.

You're really emphasizing the 10 minutes thing, aren't you? I'm not going to tell you that your opinion is wrong, but when you state that a game most people say is great "wasn't great by any means" as fact, you're expecting an argument. So I'll give you one.

The game has no replayability and you experienced everything in it in 10 minutes? The simple fact that people play the game for hundreds of hours completely destroys your ability to say that. Maybe it had no replayability for you, but it definitely has replayability. And 10 minutes? The game isn't just dungeons, you know. There's a huge amount of interest in just wondering around and stumbling on things, like a lighthouse full of bodies that starts an unexpected quest to find their murderer or a sunken ship or a shrine to a dark god who commands you to go solve their problems. Not to mention all the side quest-lines with their own plots, characters, tones, and several hours of gameplay. Then there are numerous playstyles which, due to the leveling system, become more defined and distinct as you go along. Archery or magic in the first ten minutes is definitely not archery or magic 10 or 20 or 50 hours in. There's a lot to do in Skyrim and there's a lot of variety in doing it.

TLDR: You didn't experience everything in Skyrim in 10 minutes, you experienced 10 minutes of Skyrim in 10 minutes. If you didn't like it it's fine that you quit(not like you need anyone's approval anyway), but people aren't playing it for 100s of hours because it's the same ten minutes over and over. That's just false.

You seem to think I spent only ten minutes in game. I have sunk 200+ hours into it, hoping it would get better. It didn't.

Magic is the exact same at the start and end game, except that you have a different spell that you continually cast until you're out of mana, then drink a mana potion or run round like a retard until your mana fills up.
Archery is very similar at the start and end game too. What do the perks do? Allow you to zoom in? Slow time whilst you're zoomed in, that's the big one. Its still the same motions as it was early on, with nothing much changed.

Exploring would be interesting if they focused more on making each area look different to the other areas. Get me a screenshot and I'll get one of an extremely similar looking area. There are a few uniquish areas, but most of them are the same thing in a slightly different order. Hardly exiting.

The same deal goes for quests. Outside of the questline ones (Dark Brotherhood, Thieves Guild, Companions, College of Winterhold, Main Quest About three Daedric quests (Sanguine, Molag Bal and one other I can't quite remember), they were all the exact same quest, just with a different location.

Now, for your 'You couldn't have experienced it in ten minutes'. My first ten minutes of Skyrim went something like this:
-Finish intro
-Ignore everything, head to that cool looking dungeon over there
-Complete first of many samey dungeons, this one feeling unique because it was the first one.
-Use all main styles of combat, to get a feel for which one I liked best (Single Handed Warrior, Single Handed Assassin, Single Handed shield warrior, Stealth archer, Warrior Archer, Destruction magic [Admittedly the other magics were not available at that time. After that time, I found out for the most part that conjuration is the most boring way to play the game, illusionist and alterationist can be interesting, but turns into a repetitive grind once you get a good style])
-Go to riverwood and get dumped with misc quests and a storyline quest.

Now, did I fight a dragon? No.
Does it matter? No. Dragons are some of the least interesting fights in Skyrim. A bear can kill one. Solo. No joke. I saw it happen. Dragon fights consist of waiting for it to land/stay still so I can stab/shoot it with my sword/bow/magic repeatedly until it dies.

The main problem with dragons, like everything in Skyrim, is that they are far too easy to kill. Short of a Chuck Norris topless hand to hand style battle, there is no challenge to them. Even with that, just chug 1 potion of resist fire and punch away. You'll eventually kill it.
The problem here isn't so much that they are too easy in and of itself - in Morrowind after a short while everything was piss easy and you could accidentally a god. The problem is that the fun things like hovering, scroll of Icarian flight or W/E, custom spell making, ect. were taken out to give the game some challenge and a form of balance, whilst the game itself presents no challenge and I'll be damned if its balanced.

The most redeeming feature of Skyrim is its mods - yet they are not the game itself, and Bethesda actively tried to stop you from using too many with their removal of Large Address Awareness from the PC version.

Skyrim contained a brief breath of fresh air from most titles of the day, but it was hardly remarkable or amazing in its own right. I had much the same experience all my friends had.

First day "Skyrim is so intense I play BF3 when I need to calm down"
End of week: No-one playing Skyrim, all on BF3. Except me, the ever hopeful it-might-get-better that played DN:F almost through to the end because the first 20 minutes were refreshing and I had hoped it would get back to that sort of thing.

Other than the surface of the world being mostly open and without loading screens, what was so amazing about Skyrim that makes it better than any other game this year? One feature doesn't redeem an entire game, especially when the only thing different about that feature is 'mostly no loading screens'.

Now, all that said, I'm off to play Skyrim. Not for the game, but to see just how many NPCs my PC can handle at once. I'll see if I can get a good 300 v 300 battle going somewhere...

Locutus9956:
sigh...

I remember when ZP used to make objective reviews and it's end of the year lists made a concerted effort to genuinely list the best and worst games of the year....

(they never were)

Either my tastes differ from everybody else on the planet, or I was really, REALLY high when I played Dead Island.

The story was almost-non-existent, the characters were as deep as a sheet of paper, but the gameplay at least was fun as Hell. So why all the hate, damn it?

Joccaren:

Magic is the exact same at the start and end game, except that you have a different spell that you continually cast until you're out of mana, then drink a mana potion or run round like a retard until your mana fills up.
Archery is very similar at the start and end game too. What do the perks do? Allow you to zoom in? Slow time whilst you're zoomed in, that's the big one. Its still the same motions as it was early on, with nothing much changed.

I'm not sure what you were expecting, maybe flossing teeth with the bow before firing?. The perks can be useful, personally I've concentrated mostly on archery, so now I can take down pretty much anything, I always play these games as a hunter. Anyway, theres a perk to speed up draw speed, drawn movement speed, increases critical, stun etc etc.

Joccaren:

Exploring would be interesting if they focused more on making each area look different to the other areas. Get me a screenshot and I'll get one of an extremely similar looking area. There are a few uniquish areas, but most of them are the same thing in a slightly different order. Hardly exiting.

That can be said of real life mate, take a castle, or even just a tower, and compare it to another tower, you'll find they look pretty similar. There is only so much they can do, they really have no choice but to re-use furniture and meshes, otherwise we'd have longer loading times, and that usual degredation in media quality as the game progresses. I mean, what game out there is as big as Skyrim, yet has more detail?

I mentioned something in another thread relating to Skyrim, and got shot down, so here is my underbelly...but...

PC gamers tend to ruin games for themselves sometimes. It's too easy to say, ''Sod it, I'm off to spawn this or that, or mess with this, or I'm too impatient to wait on that levelling up.'' Then the cheats set in. Everyone I know with the PC version of Skyrim has made the game pointless for themselves. I don't need anyone saying 'not me!', because I don't know any of you personally, I'm only going by my experience. I am playing it on XBox, I haven't cheated... except maybe looking up a youtube video of a treasure map location. Anyway, I trully think that I play Skyrim very differently than my PC-gaming friends. I can't cheat, so it doesn't bother me, I know that levelling up takes time and effort, and that's the whole point. The minute that you don't necesserily have to spend an hour crafting and enchanting to boost skills, you can just cheat, and a lot of you do, don't you?

Play Skyrim once more, play by the rules, ban yourself from cheating, and I guarantee you'll enjoy the game a lot more. I struggled with some quests early on, had to backtrack out of dungeons a couple of times (mostly due to powerful mages), but now I'm bad ass, I can snipe any human enemy with 1 shot - but I earned that, I spent the time levelling up so that I would be fairly bow-epic. Console gamers don't have the option of cheating or modding, and in the case of Skyrim I'd say that makes it a better game. I've put in over 200 hours too, and for me Skyrim is hands down GOTY.

Am the only one who are sick of always hearing the hate for COD and Battlefield? CoD is not a bad game, but it's not a good game either. It is decent. Also that their is no Dragon Age 2 at the worst off list is beyond reason.

I've got no problem with Yahtzee's pick for the worst pair of games, but I'm a bit suprised that he stressed at the start it is purely based on how much fun he had with it. I didn't play MW3, did play BF3, and the singleplayer isn't anything spectacular, but it is at least a functional game. That's more than we can say from games like Mindjack. If he'd put BF3 and MW3 at the top for what their lack of innovation, or their message, or what it means for the game industry to have those be the most heavily marketed and hot selling games of the year, I can get behind that. But is Yahtzee so sick of 'realistic' shooters that he hates just playing a functional game more than a broken piece of buggy shovelware? Well, apparently...

totally heterosexual:

Locutus9956:
sigh...

I remember when ZP used to make objective reviews and it's end of the year lists made a concerted effort to genuinely list the best and worst games of the year....

(they never were)

Reviews should be subjective anyway, as it is one persons opinion. Yahtzee is very good at what he does. I think that people do sometimes find it difficult to take someone disliking something they love. Also I think that sometimes people find it difficult to know whether Yahtzee likes something due to to the fact there isn't an 8/10 or a 4/10 at the end of every review.

He also places more emphasis on originality and pure fun than many other critics, as well as story. So if games flounder there they suffer in his eyes. See MW and MW3 reviews for reference.

And he has stated that anything he doesn't mention in his reviews is basically fine. But I find it useful for someone to mention a games faults, even if it is something that has been rated highly, and that I may end up buying and liking. Just becauase a good game has faukts doesn't mean it's not a good game.

icaritos:

GonzoGamer:
Every year there's that one game that I DON'T regret buying. In 2011, that game was portal 2. Good choice.

Xman490:
Skyrim FREEZES? I thought Bethesda was over "New Vegas" levels of glitchiness! I thought that Skyrim's worst bugs were along the lines of "hovering ground ladies" or spinning horsemen (as seen in a Youtube video).

Has anyone else had serious glitches with Skyrim? I'm starting to doubt whether I should get it if it's going to crash on me.

If you're on the PC, wait for the modders to fix it.

If you have a 360, play it for 10 mins at a time so it doesn't melt.

If you have a ps3, avoid it like the plague.

They say patch 1.4 will "address" it which means that they can't "fix" it.

I'm guessing they didn't send Yhatzee the ps3 copy...
Oh yea, he's a reviewer.

Can't fix what is fundamentally a hardware issue. Unless they send someone in your house to shove more RAM into your PS3 it is quite likely that there won't be any massive improvement.

Is that even possible. If you were to somehow install more memory on your ps3, would the machine even recognize it?
I think I know what I'm going to do the next time I have one of my Frankenstein moments.

It's missing the music from the last one. It wouldn't even bother me if the last one didn't have music but now it does.

Happy New Year, Ben
You did not get me a present either, Shithead.

Nice compilation

GonzoGamer:

icaritos:

GonzoGamer:
Every year there's that one game that I DON'T regret buying. In 2011, that game was portal 2. Good choice.


If you're on the PC, wait for the modders to fix it.

If you have a 360, play it for 10 mins at a time so it doesn't melt.

If you have a ps3, avoid it like the plague.

They say patch 1.4 will "address" it which means that they can't "fix" it.

I'm guessing they didn't send Yhatzee the ps3 copy...
Oh yea, he's a reviewer.

Can't fix what is fundamentally a hardware issue. Unless they send someone in your house to shove more RAM into your PS3 it is quite likely that there won't be any massive improvement.

Is that even possible. If you were to somehow install more memory on your ps3, would the machine even recognize it?
I think I know what I'm going to do the next time I have one of my Frankenstein moments.

I don't think that would be possible unfortunately. The mobo is far too old, the likehood that it would support more RAM is small.

I can see why Yathzee doesn't like the SP part of Bf3. It wasn't great but I found it to be ok. You actually wasn't really a super hero in it but more of a normal soldier.

Though the MP part of BF3 for me is so much better. So much enjoyment from it.

I watch Yahtzee every week because he never fails to make me laugh. My biggest laugh this week was putting CoD and Battlefield as the worse games of the year.

Any critic that wasn't going for laughs and put them as their worse games of the year, I'd have to think they were huffing glue in between taking mushrooms and LSD.

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