Zero Punctuation: Spore

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Every second of that nooooo adequately covers 3 fucking months of hype about that game that we had to deal with. Don't like it? Don't let a game get hyped for five goddamn centuries next time.

I can't give Yahtzee too much credit for this review if only because at this point ragging on Spore is like playing Duck Hunt with the Zapper two inches from the TV. You don't really have to play Spore to review it now, just write your best possible variation on "five half-baked games come together to produce a half-baked game", rag on the DRM if you feel it'll help, and voila, a thousand words that write themselves and amount to "Spore's reach exceeds its grasp. And EA sucks. Next!"

So basically,this game is about eating cells, creating freaks, killing freaks, destroying cities and destroying planets. I might get that game.

Thank you Yahtzee I was sick of everybody giving this game near perfect scores I found this game incredibly boring and bad (although i have always hated sim games). And your video is awesome and i think all the other people who say you're becoming stale are foolish you're just changing up your style like de-rez.

Edit: Plus he doesn't have many games to work with major title releases have slowed down (besides Star Wars TFU which is awesome) so when it gets closer to christmas and more big titles come out i think he will get funnier.

I always enjoy ZP, but that was one of the funniest I've seen in a while.

it was funny but not his best

it was basically a rant i thought not a proper review..and this is coming from a big fan of his

I enjoyed colonizing those silly infadels. *Long, evil laugh*

Needless to say there were some flaws here and there but that's what sequels are for.

In my opinion, this game is fun. Also, I have been able to get past the herbivore part of the tribe without being attacked once.

Pretty funny, but it seems like you sound as you did in your original videos.

Okay, but just doesn't sound as good.

It's alright, but great?


The prolonged NOOOOO was probably the only time I thought "shut up, already!" while watching Yahtzee's videos. It was still funny.

Otherwise, decent review. Not as hilarious as some of the other ones, but still good. I knew at some point he was going to make a reference to penis monsters.

Sadly, you didn't play the game enough to work out how not to be attacked as a Herbivore. Plus, you can still attack as a Herbivore if you want... you can be a veggie warmonger no problem. Also, you didn't mention it's all on one disc, and the possibilities for expansions, modding, etc. Which was mentioned for The Sims, i.e. Batman et al.

Oh, and I found The Sims boring as hell beyond locking someone in a room until they piss themselves or setting them on fire. I'm liking Spore.

Disappointed with this week's episode. After playing Spore I was expecting its heart to be ripped out and the bug, glitches and down right fucking annoying broken bits to be displayed in all it gorey detail...However....

This Episode = Fail

Barely even registered on the humor scale to be honest, the long drawn out idiot sounding no pretty much killed any humour that had managed to worm its way through.

Pretty funny, it's always nice when a hyped game gets it's heart ripped out and shat on. Makes me feel all warm and happy inside.

The second "Noooooooo" should have been shorter.

that was great

I thought it was funny, and certainly more entertaining than most anything else one will find on the web.

Personally, I love Spore, but this was just hilarious. Kudos.

I'm somewhat confused. I learned that Spore was being released only a few days before it came out so I missed all the hype and the ads, so I really didn't have any ideas in my head when I went to play Spore. Maybe that's why I liked it so much.

Did... Yahtzee actually play the game though? I know I found playing friendly (herbivore, social, etc) I had it quite easy. Playing as a herbivore, your only chance of defeat is if an Epic creature comes after you. Otherwise, your chance of being mauled is 0%, because everything else can simply be walked up-to and sung to.

Now I'm not saying he didn't try the game out, but if he did, then why did he only really quote all the negative aspects from the forums and stuff? Why didn't he mention all of the bugs or the fact that the game is hardly as customizable as it seems? If you want the most powerful creature (either in friendliness or in ferocity), you only have a few things to choose from. Nothing is based on looks, it's all on stats if you want to successfully beat the game. He also didn't care to mention that all other tribes in the Tribal stage were one creature, nor did he mention that all civilizations in the Civilization stage were just copies of your own creature.

I love sim games like civilization,, the sims, sim city, the tycoons all those but was whole heartly disapointed. I bought spore one of the few this year I actually purchased and now has reminded me why I should go back to downloading them. I wanted to go for a swim but all that I got was a little sit in the kiddy pool. Where was the depth we were promised. Seriously and why did they remove all basic colors why couldn't I choose a cherry red, black or royal blue. Why were all the colors taken from a 80's soft rock album color with the wishy washy pastel covers. The game lacked even a hint of realism like you find in the character designs of the sims. I hope the developers of the civilization games take a look at this and go hey we can make this good and more awesome. Hated the game want my $50 dollars back but then I reminded myself I'm just spirtually paying for all the other games i rip off so i dont feel bad about it.


definitely not your best, NOOOOOOO isn't funny unless Family guy does it, it made sense, it just wasnt very funny, and you didnt write anything in the box, you just wrote you were reviewing SPORE, huh...

hopefully next week will be better

Yahtzee's reviews seem to be getting more and more bitter and less funny...

Why would you compare Spore to The Sims? Maxis didn't want to make both games the same, or else they'd just make another damn expansion pack.

Spore was very new and distinctive, I like it.

I agree that the review was funny, but not as much as his some of his older ones.

Why would you compare Spore to The Sims? Maxis didn't want to make both games the same, or else they'd just make another damn expansion pack.

The point was that Will Wright is some sort of genius, and that we should accept his games as such. Same with Sid Meier. Same with Peter Molyneux.

It's like Spore is supposed to be awesome because 'they' said so. And while it's an inventive game, it's nothing special. It sort of is like the Sims, only, uhm, more 'user creative' and less 'Sim-ish'.

Spore was supposed to take 'Sim' games to the next level. Allowing people to create, birth, evolve, and expand a 'thing'. But in the end it turned out to be just a really good avatar creation system that also had a small simulation game attached.

seems some people missed the joke behind the second 'no'.


the first 'no' was a short answer

the second 'no' was the loooooong answer.

the third 'no' was also a short answer

the joke is just thinking how long the 4th 'long' no would be given the length of the second one in relation to the first.

hope that clears that up

Still yet to play it and I was so looking forward to it but this review, coupled with the evil DRM may have effectively turned me off.
If you ever actually read this far Yahtzee
this could be fun:
Nice work as always

I have to agree with Yahtzee on this one Spore was really overrated (like most games in the past 2 years, see Halo 3). Progressing through the game as someone who chooses destruction & domination really makes it hard for anyone who chose the opposite, the horrible pansies they are. I stopped playing as soon as it got to the final phase as it just turned even more repetetive than the start. Bottom line if you like Sim City series don't buy this untill it comes down in price.

Hit the nail on the head with this one Yahtzee. Good work.

I was really disappointed with this review. Bashing Spore for shallow strategic gameplay is like bashing the Sims for its repetitive point-and-click activities. You're missing the point that it's supposed to be a CREATIVE game, not a objective-based one.

All in all I felt like I was watching a slightly funnier version of IGN's review. It's kind of sad considering that I usually watch Yahtzee's reviews to get away from that sort of thing.

You tried Will Wright, you really did. We're sorry.

Each episode we are faced with more notes about Yahtzee's somewhat homosexual fantasies.

Stretch out that "Noo" a little longer.

Next time you might be able to get away with not even really making a video.

:P Im just teasing.

Actually we are affected by foreign policy decisions. Those of us in the military fight the violent one, those of us who do business outside the states may end up without our customer for a number of reasons due to foreign policy, and we are the ones who get taxed to pay for it all for good or ill. We usually don't end up with violent responses here though.

Interesting review, if a bit stale.

Also, WAY too many ads.

Did you notice that that Warhammer ad went for longer than the actual feature? I have a limited amount of downloads, and I don't want to be wasting them on that, every single time.

SIDENOTE: No one banned on the first page? No "FIRST!" trolls? Is this the apocolypse?

I liked the review (although the 'NOOO...' was about 5 seconds too long to remain funny all the way through), but I also liked Spore.

Although Yahtzee's comments have me stratching my heads somewhat - about how difficult this and that is - On my first run through, I created a peaceful herbivore species and had no trouble surviving at all. Cell stage was also easy for me. I dunno, maybe he was trying on the Hard difficultly whereas I played on Normal.

to put fifteen seconds of no into your vid is an insult
to bash spore is an even bigger one
just because your mind has corroded from eating to much gaming shit and a game does not pull your cock the right way, you shouldn't stop being open to new technology and new gaming-ideas
space age sucks in some ways
but thats about it
good night and good luck

lol fanboy.

Good review!

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